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Mariners blow big lead but eke out win (this is the correct spelling of “eke,” let this be a lesson to you “eek”-ers out there)

Seattle Mariners v Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
SAME
Photo by John McCoy/Getty Images

Tonight was like the 2010s all over again, with Félix putting up a strong start and the rest of the team promptly crapping all over it. The non-Félix pitching was bad, but hey, remember when the Saints won the Super Bowl for a revitalized New Orleans? That was pretty cool.

The Chilean miners rescue: Jay Bruce, .359 WPA

BUT ACTUALLY, we all know who the real WPA winner is tonight (.153):

The Kardashian Kard: Anthony Swarzak, -.205 WPA

But ACTUALLY: Ruben Alaniz, -.118

The Mariners hitters struck out 9 times to the Angels 7, but they walked 11 times to the Angels 4. They also hit THREE dingers and committed just ONE error, which should really be wiped out because Ryon Healy played maybe his best game of third base ever, and certainly in a Mariners uniform.