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FanPost Friday: A Mariners Carol

Safeco Field was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that.

A Boston Red Sox fan holds up a sign reading “Scro
but did he knowingly alter the baseballs???
Photo credit should read JOHN MOTTERN/AFP via Getty Images

All right, English Lit nerds, this one is for you!

Prompt: Re-imagine “A Christmas Carol” with current and former Seattle Mariners

Grab your Charles Dickens (I am so sorry), put quill to parchment, and give me your version of “A Christmas Carol” with notable Seattle Mariners as the characters. It can be as simple as a cast listing, or as extravagant as a full rewrite.

A Christmas Carol At The Old Vic Theatre London Photo by Robbie Jack/Corbis via Getty Images

Here’s a start to get the creative juices flowing:

(enter mid-opening scene of Stave 1 with Lou Piniella as “Ebenezer Lou” and Joey Cora as his nephew)

“Don’t be angry, Uncle Lou. Come! Dine with us tomorrow.”

Ebenezer Lou said that he would see him -- yes, indeed he did. He went the whole length of the expression, and said that he would see him in that extremity first.

”But why?” cried Joey. ”Why?”

”Why did you get into baseball?” said Ebenezer Lou.

”Because I fell in love.”

”Because you fell in love!” growled Ebenezer Lou, kicking at the dirt, as if that were the only one thing in the world more ridiculous than a merry Christmas. ”Good afternoon!”

”Nay, uncle, but you never came to see me before I started playing baseball. Why give it as a reason for not coming now?”

”Good afternoon,” said Ebenezer Lou.

”I want nothing from you; I ask nothing of you; why cannot we be friends?”

”Good afternoon,” said Ebenezer Lou, throwing his hat on the ground and kicking it in the direction of his nephew.

(to be continued???)

Take a stab at this in any format you choose. We’ll front page the best submissions over the weekend.

BONUS PROMPT: What’s your favorite movie version of “A Christmas Carol?” Discuss in the comments!