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Recap of a 7-6 Mariners loss from an Orioles fan

It's like Camden Chat, but on a teal background tonight

Seattle Mariners v Baltimore Orioles Photo by Patrick McDermott/Getty Images

[Editor's note: My imaginary Orioles-fan friend Matt has very generously volunteered to write this recap for me today. Thank you, Matt! You're welcome, Isabelle!]

Oh yeah, keepin' it hot, baby! Got that five game win streak going and it feels so go-

Sorry, what? What was incomprehensible? Ohhh, inconsiderate, I see. My bad, dude. The Orioles and the Mariners are kind of kindred spirits, I guess, so I can feel your pain. Um, alright, let's try that again...

Tonight, Chris Tillman was his pretty bummer Tillman self, but the bullpen locked it down for 3 23 innings and who needs pitching really if you've got Manny Machado, Chris(t) Davis [Editor's note: NO RELIGION], and Wellington Castillo? Now the O's are a game and a half back of the wild card spot. After the start of their season, hot damn does this feel good.

The Mariners scored first in the top of the second off a solo shot from Danny Valencia, who's one of the few guys on the team to not be a former AL East player. I wasn't too worried though, and the Birds proved me right in the bottom of the inning, knocking around Mystery Man Marco Gonzales for two runs thanks to a walk and three back-to-back singles. That double play Craig Gentry ground into afterwards was a real bummer though.

Speaking of double plays, have NL teams thanked y'all yet for snagging Mitch Haniger and rubbing your special Mariner Magic on him? You know, the magical ability the franchise has of taking solid prospects, letting them show some hope and promise, and then falling to piec-

Again with the censorship? My dude, come on. Ugh, fine, I guess it was a little harsh, and I guess he hasn't actually been bad bad since coming back from the DL. But he hit into two double plays in a single game! He was like the Kendrys M-

OKAY. Fine. Mitch Haniger is fine, and single game sample sizes don't mean anything. Happy now?

Anyway, things got a little tense in the fourth, when so-called Benny Ballgame Gamel crushed a ball to center field for a three run homer. Good 'ol Gentle Gentry came through in the bottom of that inning though, and had an RBI single to tie things up, and then our pal Marco hit Baltimore Orioles Superstar Tim Beckham. I'd probably be furious at you for hitting Swaggy T, but that HBP brought in a run, so we're cool.

Adam Jones homered in the fifth and HAHAHAHA you traded him for-

Nah, you don't need to stop me, I'll stop myself. That misery has been way overplayed. Look, we're really happy to have Jones in B-more, so I'll leave it at that.

It was a good thing Jone homered when he did, because the next inning Gamel singled out to center field and somehow Nelson Cruz and Kyle Seager were able to chug-a-lug-a-lug around the diamond to score and tie the game.

In the seventh Davis doubled, and another run scored, and then no one scored for the rest of the night. It was rough, but credit to Emilio Pagan and Christian Bergman over in your bullpen for putting in some major work. 4 23 innings isn't an easy ask for a bullpen, but they kept it tight and made it a fun battle. Fun, because the O's ended up winning, obviously.

Obviously I'm biased, but it felt like the O's had this one all the way. They were just making contact on everything, and once Tillman left the game the Mariners basically just flailed around, minus a hot moment in the eighth that was extinguished by a Mike Zunino strikeout.

Two more games left in our BBQ Bowl series, and you guys are still just half a game back from us in the WC. May the best birds win.

[Editor's note: Someday soon the Mariners will play baseball at Safeco Field again. During that stretch of time they may also decide to play somewhat exciting baseball, too. Who knows? Anything and nothing could happen.]