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It's the last regular season game against the Minnesota Twins. The Mariners are one win away from their second series win against the AL Central first place squad and also one win away from .500 (again). I would like both of these things to happen today, please. Thank you.
Ben Gamel survived his close encounter with the outfield wall last night and is leading off with his infinity BABIP. Side question: if you'd been the fan sitting next to the wall there, would you have given his hat back so easily? What player would if have to be for you to be an absolute dick to and not give it back? Or at least fuck with him a little bit? Answer in the game thread, please.
Also, this is the first game that I've covered since Mitch da gawd came back and boy, did I miss that guy. What a hunk.
Also also, I would be remiss not to mention that Jose Berrios has gotten it together this season and has been very good so far.
Nevertheless, get that meatloaf, Mariners. And here is some Meat Loaf to make your morning nonsensically dramatic.
This is one of the worst karaoke songs, by the way. Don't ever try it. The DJ and entire bar will hate you.