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# Mariners don’t C the Z, Consequently don’t W the G

Jerry’s Equation never lies.

Sometimes when I get stressed, I pick an upcoming event to get excited about. I have been particularly stressed this week with final papers, projects, and exams. I was most anxious about my accounting final, which I took yesterday (yes, on a Saturday. I know it’s stupid). To help cope with the pain, I told myself “once Saturday is behind me, I get to write the recap for the Mariners game on Sunday. Buckle down, Mounger!” On the bright side, I am done with Managerial Accounting; however, Sunday’s game didn’t do a lot to erase it from my memory. So, without further ado, here’s a very elementary-level accountants review of the Mariner’s tilt with the Angels.

My professor told us once that some numbers, like net operating income, can give misleading information about a segment’s performance. Essentially, a firm could report that one segment has a negative operating income; however, that loss could be the result of allocated common fixed expenses. Contribution margin, on the other hand, gives a more accurate representation of a segments performance.

Similarly you might hear that Tyler Smith slapped a two-run dinger in the second, which may lead you to believe the Mariners had themselves a good day.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but that is not the case. We have a much more telling statistic that I like to call NJU, which stands for Net Jerry Units. This figure suggests that today’s outing was not a profitable performance for the Mariners.

## NJU = (M’s pitcher K’s + M’s players BB’s) - (LA’s pitcher K’s + LA’s players BB’s) = (6+2)-(9+5)=-6

The wheels fell off in the second and third innings, when the Angels scored seven of their eight runs. Over that stretch, Ariel Miranda and Casey Fien combined to allow four walks, four doubles, a pair of singles, a wild pitch, and a two -run home run.

The Mariners weren’t the only group having a rough Sunday; our friends at MLB At Bat also looked to have their share of issues as well. Notice below that apparently Jesse Chavez threw only 27 pitches in four innings, 24 of which were strikes.

But let’s just pretend that this pitch count is correct. Apparently the average pitcher throws a little more than 15 pitches per inning. If that’s the case, then Chavez’ pitch volume budget variance must have been through the roof.

Adding insult to injury, the Angels elected to use Dustin Ackley as a pinch hitter in the seventh inning. He flew out in an inning that plated two more Angels runs.

But let’s look at the bright side. This game, like my accounting test, now resides in the past. Here are a few other noteworthy items from today:

• Ichabod Crane’s great, great grandson Max Povse shined in three innings of work today, highlighted by three strikeouts.
• Mike Trout rudely robbed Leonys Martin of a double.
• Jean Segura came through with a clutch double for the Dominican Republic today.
• Gonzaga earned a one-seed in the NCAA tournament. This frustrates me. My twin sister goes to Gonzaga. WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS GET WHAT SHE WANTS, MOM?!