Sometime around 3 o'clock in the afternoon on Sunday, July 10th, all the members of the Seattle Mariners not attending the All Star Game in San Diego will have a decision to make. Just where in the hell are they gonna spend the next four days until a home series starting the following Friday night against the Astros. These sorts of decisions aren't easy to make. Even more difficult is that the team will be in Kansas City, an airport with direct access to almost nowhere you'd want to be. Although, Wade LeBlanc might be sorta right where he wants to be.
Look, vacations are hard to plan, and there's a million ways to enjoy four days off when you are getting paid hundreds of thousands if not millions of dollars per annum. I should know, I'm starting a business. However, let's be honest. You only have four full days to burn here. Depending on your vacation style, this is most likely too short of an amount of time to fall in love with a new city, so nearness is prioritized. We gotta get in and out and relax all in one fell swoop. Well, fear not, Uncle Dave is here, small drink umbrella in hand, to get you nice and chilled out for the All Star Break.
Stay "Local" - New Orleans, Austin/San Antonio
What's the quickest way to vacation from Kansas City? Easy, you're already half-way across the country, so why not just stay out that way. Listen, with Jamie Moyer 2.0 on the squad in the form of Wade LeBlanc and all his Down South Knowledge, the fellas who are willing are bound to have a good time with a boot-kickin' couple days Down Under. Sure, it isn't actually Australia, but New Orleans is almost as lawless. Imagine open-carry laws with Seth Smith, Steve Clevenger, and Wade Miley all eatin' shrimp Po' Boys and singing jazz. Leonys Martin probably has an amazing two-step. Beads, beads everywhere.
The other option for staying local is heading down to the Great State of Texas. Sure, sure, everyone on Twitter wants to tell you that Austin is amazing for this and that and really it's just because they wish they were still in college and think that they're younger than they really are. Austin is great for music and food, but for the full-meal deal, you stay two days in Austin, and ride, via horseback, down the tributaries of the Rio Grande to San Antonio. Here, a peaceful river walk can turn into a raucous river-swim with Ketel Marte in a ten-gallon hat and Chris Iannetta pretending he's Davey Crockett on top the Alamo.
Go Fishing - Yakima River, Snake River, A River in Alaska
We all know what Tony Zych, Donn Roach, Wade Miley, James Paxton, Seth Smith, and Nelson Cruz really want to do. They wanna go get lost in the wilderness and catch a couple brown trout. For the stay close option, I'd send these fellas on the Yakima River. Sure, it's hotter than Hell this time of year and the hops aren't ready, but the hills are alive and the river is teeming with lil' fishies. For a greater escape, these dudes just might consider taking a full-day's drive out to Montana to see the Last Great Place, get away from it all, and fish the Snake River.
I imagine that there would be just not enough denim, felt, and leather to pass around with cowboys such as these losing lures and cracking "Just one more beer". Enjoy yourselves, you little rascals.
I feel like this is where Guti is going so I'll probably be there, too. North Beach, Oahu is a great place to catch some surf and later in the night you can mosey down the west coast to all the nice hotels for Pool Time turning into Hot Tub Time. I love Hot Tub Time. Refreshes the legs.
Also, Mai Tai's. A drink almost designed for Taijuan Walker.
Seattle And Chill
The weather in Seattle is typically phenomenal around the All Star Break and some might just want to take it really easy for the four days off. I imagine Steve Cishek reading some Blaise Pascal while walking around Greenlake, or Shawn O'Malley having a fine dinner at Manolin. There's all sorts of things to take in that most of these guys haven't had a chance to see. Edwin Diaz would probably love the Seattle Aquarium, and why not make a day of it and go to the Woodland Park Zoo as well. Why not take a beer bicycle tour through Ballard with Kuma and the King? Everything is your oyster in your own hometown. Snoqualmie Falls is well worth escaping the city and a fine, local brewery is even opening there soon!
Who am I kidding, Shawn O'Malley is eating at Dick's all four nights and sprinting seven miles a day.
Now, if you aren't asked to the All Star Game, or voted in, you may wonder why you'd want to go down to San Diego anyway? Well, because San Diego friggin' rocks. Coronado Island and the Coronado Hotel compose one of the more ideal vacation locals on the entire West Coast. Between taking in the Derby and the Game, you can brewery hop all over town, and simply get your toes on the beach.
I love a good sea breeze.
Robinson Cano will probably sponsor a trip worth remembering here. I'm in, just to see Britney Spears alone.
Push-ups And Squats
Someone needs to keep Seager company.