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Celebrate National Poetry Writing Month With the Mariners

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Because poets and Mariners fans share equal temperaments

Roses are red, violets are gray, if you don't perform, Jerry will send you to Tampa Bay
Roses are red, violets are gray, if you don't perform, Jerry will send you to Tampa Bay
Scott Halleran/Getty Images

April is almost to a close--already!--and with it the end of National Poetry Writing Month. If you don't know, NaPoWriMo is a challenge to write a poem every day for the month of April. If you feel inspired to catch up in a burst of mad genius, you can find more info here. In celebration of the first true month of baseball coming to an end, I present to you a series of famous poems, recast for our lovable band of goofballs.

(Perfect) Love

For Felix Hernandez

With apologies to Samuel Taylor Coleridge

All thoughts, all passions, all delights,
Whatever pitches catchers frame,
Are all but ministers of Our King Felix
And feed his no-nos, his perfect game.

Our hope, our joy, our one true king,
We rise to appear in his court.
Every fifth day we stand and sing
And shout down death for one day more.

The Passionate Fan to the Gold Glove

For Kyle Seager

With apologies to Christopher Marlowe

Come live at Safeco and be our love
And we shall wreath you with a golden glove.
Flash the leather, step up to the dish;
We will grant you all the time you wish.

And we will sit upon the stairs
To watch you play and make no errors;
You who oft web-gem but never brag:
Our sweet prince, our own K-swag.

The grounds-crew shall dance and sing
For thy delight each fifth inning.
If these delights thy mind may move,
Then stay with us, and be our love.

To the Rookies, Make Much of Time

With apologies to Robert Herrick

Gather ye popups while ye may,
For Jerry’s phone has been updated;
And this same player that smiles today,
To-morrow may be traded.

Over the glorious roof of Safeco, the sun
The higher it is getting,
The sooner the team will score a run
And nearer the season’s ending.

So be not coy, but use your time;
and while ye go, not TOOTBLAN--
For have ye but one athletic prime
And Jerry will wait for no man.

Bitty Baseballer Boogie Powell

With Apologies to Shel Silverstein

Bitty baseballer Boogie Powell
Refuses to play the field shallow
He’d rather run and jump and fly
To pick the ball before the batter’s eye.
Until one day he jumped too high—
it was a hot day in late July—
and over the fences he did fly.
Farewell, dear Boogie, goodbye!

Hope Is The Thing With Feathers

With apologies to Emily Dickinson

"El Guti" is the thing with feathers -
That perches in left field -
And glides about on healed wings
And never stops - just swings.

And sweetest - the bat crack - is heard
Though low-scoring might be the game -
That could lift up the 2015 Mariner
Who kept all our hearts aflame.

The Large Boomstick

With apologies to William Carlos Williams

so much depends
upon

a large boom
stick

glazed with Astros’ fan
tears

flipped beside the white
basepath