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Lockedout Landing Pilot: The Darkest Timeline

You’ve done it now.

MLB: Pittsburgh Pirates at Seattle Mariners
Are we having fun yet?
Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

Baseball dead? Baseball is dead. If you’re reading this, the players union and the owners have yet to come to an agreement over a new Collective Bargaining Agreement, and we as Major League Baseball fans will be feeling colder than ever this winter. Because the content wheel needs to continuously churn here at I have taken it upon myself (believe me, NOBODY asked me to do this. In fact a few DMed me on Slack asking me to specifically not.) to talk about what’s been on my mind since the season ended. 15 and 85, this is Lockedout Landing.

Shameless Plug-

I will be appearing at the 2016 Holiday Ale Festival on Friday, December 2nd in Portland, OR. I will make sure to bring a Sharpie from the office with me, and I’m more than happy to sign your free glass with ticket, ticket stub, or any other acceptable memorabilia.


These are things that I like. I’m not asking you to like them too because we are all different. That’s what makes society so great.


Atlanta is DOPE. The first season ended a few weeks ago, so you’ll have plenty of time to binge on this show. From the mind of Donald Glover, Childish Gambino, Troy from Community, or however else you know him. He’s described the show as Twin Peaks for rappers. I am not a rapper (don’t @ me about this) and I’ve never seen Twin Peaks (also, don’t @ me) but I enjoyed it even if I was not the key demographic. The episodes are available through the FX Network, and should be easy to find OnDemand on your cable box or FXNow if you’re living that AppleTV life.


I’ll admit I’m not crazy about Future. Most of the time he sounds like he’s autotune wailing over a track while someone who’s featured on the track does all the heavy lifting. That said, he released another mixtape with recently engaged Gucci Mane. Fire up your DatPiff and check out Free Bricks II: Zone 6 Edition. Gucci has been on fire since he’s been released from prison and this mixtape keeps that ball rolling.


Y’all going to miss Taijuan Walker. It might not be now, it might be now. But you’re going to be out on a midsummers night at Safeco Field watching Doug Fister bring that 89 MPH heat and a single tear will go down your eye thinking of what could have been.


  • I hear Metallica has a new record. Does it ROCK or what?
  • Go to No Boat if you haven’t already.
  • What is the maximum amount of money you can spend to feed one person at Taco Bell without looking like a glutton? I am asking for a friend.
  • My office password is expiring, I am open to suggestions.

This should probably do it for me. Join me next time as I watch the new season of the Gilmore Girls without any prior knowledge of the show.

One more thing. I am very open to feedback, so if you have any questions or suggestions, you can hit me up on twitter @EthanNovak