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Kendrys Morales wins Edgar Martinez Award, fire him into space with it

Call it a lifetime un-achievement award.

Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images

Yesterday while I was sitting around waiting for the Mariners to trade, not trade, tender, or not tender Mark Trumbo all day a bit of news passed by my eyes. It was about an award, which doesn't mean anything to me in particular. Baseball awards, like all awards, are largely give a satisfaction to the creator and determiner of said award, rather than the participant. I bet Derek Jeter put a few of those Gold Gloves in a few gift baskets over the years.

HOWEVER, one award is named after Edgar Martinez, the greatest DH to ever play the game. It is called, you guessed it, the Edgar Martinez Award. Due to my love for Edgar the DH of the year award, more than most others (at least Cy Young Awards that involve Felix) will at least get to me to read the announcement all the way through.

So when I read  the following:



Kendrys Morales....

Ok here's the deal: I do not like attacking players. As I've gotten older and replaced my youthful hot blood with mid 30's disillusionment and resignation I often can't summon the energy hate requires. In addition, as I shuffle along this mortal coil I recognize that professional athletes, just like us all, are merely temporal beings, and for all their fame and wealth they will one day be feeding the grass the lizard people will graze their four headed ox herds on, just like you and I.

AND YET if there is one baseball player today who can make me feel the intoxicating rush of adrenaline and rage again it is Kendrys Morales, who is the damn worst. LET'S RECAP:

Kendrys Morales wRC+ - 2014: 72
Kendrys Morales wRC+ - 2015: 131

Mariners games out of playoff position in 2014? That would be one single game, which is almost the exact amount below replacement production Morales gave the Mariners in 239 plate appearances. Your math is correct. Kendrys Morales played at a WAR/600 PA rate of -2.3.

In September, while the Mariners desperately tried to make the playoffs for the first time in 13 seasons Morales triple slashed .183/.276/.355. Add onto this failure the fact that his fielding and baserunning contributions were exactly in line with his career norms and you have a truly useless baseball player.

Is scapegoating bad? Of course it is! But Kendrys Morales is worse! I will forever and ever choose to blame him for the Mariners missing the playoffs, Felix losing the Cy Young vote, and the abject misery of the 2015 season.

Now, after watching him sprint slowly back to dugout after a soul-crushing double play time and again for my team he won a World Series, and baseball wants to award him for it with the very award named after one my team's greatest heroes. Hilariously because fate, much like Kendrys Morales, is a total prick I'm now forced to note that, ahem, (clears throat) DAVID ORTIZ DESERVED THIS AWARD YOU IDIOTS! That's right, David Ortizthe very player whom I spent a few hundred words calling overrated on this very webspace, was somehow overlooked for an award he has already won seven times for a man who had the 3rd highest fWAR of any full time DH in the AL, and 7th for players Fangraphs qualifies for the position.

This is 2015: The year my least favorite player won the award named after one of my favorite players by wronging another player who is incorrectly given much greater acclaim than that aforementioned favorite player.

Make a trade Jerry, flip the calendar ahead 30 days, acquire Kendrys Morales and then demote him to Single A. Something, anything. I just don't want to look at it anymore. What a terrible year.