8/27: Open game thread

I've sat staring at this blank text entry form for a good thirty minutes, unsure of what to write about the baseball game we are about to have between the Seattle Mariners and the Texas Rangers. What else is there to say that hasn't been said one hundred times before? So instead of the usual brief intro followed by surface-level pitching analysis and snide comments about lineups, I'm going to just leave a quick sentence here to put it all into perspective:

It's almost September and the Mariners are pushing for the playoffs and beating up on the Texas Rangers, who are the worst team in baseball.

Go ahead and bookmark this page--for the hard days, for the breakups and the car accidents and the unexpected medical bills. For when you're passed over for a promotion at work because that asshole Jordan spends more time brownnosing at stupid networking functions than he does actually working. Bookmark it and read it so you can know that for one year--even if the Mariners don't make the playoffs--everything went right in one corner of the world, for once. The Rangers are the worst team in baseball. The Rangers are the worst team in baseball.

And if you don't want to do that, read Jake's series preview to learn all about Colby Lewis, and everyone's favorite detesticled haphephobic third baseman instead.

Game info

• Rangers @ Mariners, 12:40 PM PST
• TV: ROOT, Radio: 710 ESPN
• Online: mlb.tv

And for the news sticklers:

Miller the new Bloomquist according to McClendon. Ready to play 1st and OF.

— Shannon Drayer (@shannondrayer) August 27, 2014

James Paxton optioned to Tacoma to open spot for Erasmo today. Paxton will be recalled when rosters expanded to start Tuesday in Oakland.

— Greg Johns (@GregJohnsMLB) August 27, 2014

McClendon says it's "very possible" Erasmo stays in rotation going forward in September. Has been impressed with his growth this year.

— Greg Johns (@GregJohnsMLB) August 27, 2014