clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

The Development Of John Jaso's Beard

Every so often we're supposed to write these sponsored posts, and I was supposed to write this one some time ago. It has to do with player grooming, like beards and mustaches and hair and stuff, and I never got around to it because I either forgot about it or didn't have any ideas when I remembered about it. Up against the sponsored-post deadline, I knew I had to scramble, so this afternoon I spent half an hour trying to figure out if Munenori Kawasaki is growing a mustache. (Results inconclusive.) Then I looked at a picture of John Jaso and now I'm writing a short post about John Jaso. Specifically, his beard, which he has, and didn't used to have.

I will show to you four pictures. This is John Jaso at the beginning of May. Do you remember this John Jaso? I know that this John Jaso existed, but it's startling to look at the photographic evidence. I mean, I always have scruff. I know that there was a time that I didn't, but once I saw a picture of the last time I completely shaved and it knocked me down. Who is that familiar-looking stranger!


One could tell that Jaso had strong facial-hair potential. One could tell that it took considerable work for Jaso to continue looking this neat. Before long, Jaso stopped putting in the work. The results have blossomed into something glorious. We follow over time:




In less than two months' time, John Jaso has gone from looking like a polite suburban neighbor to looking like a rugged, walking encyclopedia of survival skills. He's grown and shaped the kind of beard that everybody who tries to grow a beard wants to end up growing. Few can, but if more could, beards like Jaso's wouldn't be as special as they are. Jaso's beard is the rare beard that isn't an accessory, that doesn't just call attention to itself -- it works for him, and it suits his face so perfectly that you don't even notice at first that it's there. You see a picture of Jaso and you don't think "that's a man with a beard." You think "that's a handsome man." Then you think "and he has a beard!" Then you think "what a tremendous beard."

Dustin Ackley has a hint of a beard, but, I don't know. Seems like he should be more the scruff sort. Michael Saunders has toyed with a beard, but he can't help the color of his facial hair. Charlie Furbush has come out of nowhere to fashion one hell of a beard, and this post was nearly about him. Jaso's got the best beard on the team, though. The best beard, and I think the best facial hair in general. Look at that picture right above. You see Jaso running away from a group of baseball players, and it works. Now imagine a photoshop of Jaso's head on a man running shirtless through the woods, accompanied by his companion wolf Aleutia. Branches, roots, obstacles abound, but Jaso knows these woods, he lives in these woods, and he moves with all the speed and grace of a hawk above the canopy. John Jaso has the look. The right look for certain situations, or the right look in general? Yes.

This has been a short sponsored post about John Jaso's beard. Purchase the product that sponsored this post!