Seattle Mariners baseball exists all year. Not the games, thank most of the Gods, but the organization. And since the organization exists, the entertainment complex exists and thus the media coverage exists and thus this blog exists and thus we have to keep writing stuff! Why can't we just shut down for four months? Go somewhere else! Go read about other sports, or ski conditions, or rocks. Go read a physical book!
Oh ok, fine. Posts. Nah, that's too much work today. A poll? Brilliant!
So since the Mariners are around in all up in your life all the time, which of the following actual calendar months do you think is the worst? In other, more conversational terms, what's the worst time of the year for a baseball fan?
January? It is the furthest point from actually counting baseball games.
February? Most of the free agents have already signed and there's just nothing happening except for word that Franklin Gutierrez is injured again.
March? Because Spring Training "news" is the worst news and Franklin Gutierrez gets injured again.
April? Everyone goes apeshit over small sample sizes and Franklin Gutierrez gets injured again.
May? Nobody is going to vote for May. Correction: nobody was going to vote for May, but because I wrote the preceding sentence, some people will now vote for May.
June? The novelty of baseball every day has worn off by this point and you start skipping games for other stuff.
July? The annual reminder of how stupid the All-Star Game is and that Bud Selig is still in charge of baseball and that amazingly he's the best of the major sports commissioners.
August? Baseball is still going? Oh god, why? [May be Mariners specific]
September? All these crummy rookies, huge rosters, most teams have nothing to play for and NFL is back.
October? Because playoff baseball is exciting baseball but playoff baseball is not Mariners baseball.
November? The first month after baseball stops completely is when you miss it the most, maybe.
December? Because the winter meetings are one giant slob fest of Ken Rosenthal and Jon Heyman and the word "might", which transmits no -- NONE!! -- actually useful information, is uttered ten trillion times a day.