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Mariners Hire Pete Vuckovich As Special Guy

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Update: according to Baker, Vuckovich will be replacing Boles. I wonder what this means! Seriously, I wonder what this means.

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His actual title is "Special Assistant to the General Manager," but we all know what that means. Honestly I probably wouldn't even bother posting about this had the Mariners not also promoted Roger Hansen to Special Assistant to the General Manager earlier in the week. There is potentially meaningful activity afoot. Or potentially non-meaningful activity, I don't know. Vuckovich and Hansen join Tony Blengino, John Boles, and Ken Madeja as guys in the front office with "Special Assistant" in their titles.

What does a special assistant to the GM do, exactly? I don't know the answer to that. Talk to the GM, probably. Discuss ideas. I would imagine that all of these special assistants have varying specialties, so it never hurts to be thorough.

Jack Zduriencik has worked with Vuckovich before. It's one of the reasons Zduriencik brought him in. They were co-workers with Pittsburgh, and, oh, about that:

Vuckovich's association with the Bucs began in 1992.

Vuckovich has worked for the Pirates ever since. 1992 was the last year the Pirates finished above .500. Jesus Christ, what are they doing! This guy is organizational poison!

Vuckovich's previous position in Pittsburgh was the same as the one he's taking in Seattle, so not much should change, aside from everything besides his job title. Before that - well I guess it doesn't really matter. One of my favorite space-fillers in press releases about these things is when the author describes the guy's playing career. Pete Vuckovich was a Major League pitcher between 1975 and 1986. Who cares? Who cares that Vuckovich won the Cy Young in 1982? Who cares that Vuckovich won that Cy Young with a 1.0 K/BB? I mean, I'm sure people care, but how is that information relevant today? "Remember, the trick to winning the Cy Young is making sure to walk as many people as you strike out." This would not be valuable advice.

Vuckovich was Clu Haywood in Major League, though. So now we have one special assistant who acted, and one special assistant who kind of looks like Harold Ramis. Maybe Jack Zduriencik wants to act.