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The Three Best Parts Of Rosenthal's Trade-Felix-Hernandez Piece

Here's your source. Let's not waste any time.

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My initial thought was that if the Mariners traded Hernandez, they might as well cease to exist.

National baseball writer Ken Rosenthal's initial thought was that, if the Mariners were to trade Felix Hernandez, they wouldn't only become irrelevant now - they would become so irrelevant for so long that there would no longer be a reason for them to be. The Mariners won 85 games two years ago, and 88 games two years before that, and they have other players - like a lot of other players - but trading Felix would be tantamount to closing up shop forever and turning Safeco into a trendy nightclub. Ken Rosenthal's initial thought was apparently that the Mariners would trade Felix for malaria and a liquor license.

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Their current plan, to build around Hernandez, is not illogical. Right-hander Michael Pineda projects as a worthy No. 2 to King Felix. Left-hander James Paxton, a recently signed fourth-round pick, could develop into another top-of-the-rotation starter. And the M’s could grab another elite young pitcher with the No. 2 overall pick in the June draft.

If all that happens, a turnaround could happen quickly. But it still would not be enough.

If the Mariners had Felix, and a worthy #2 to Felix, and a top-of-the-rotation starter, and another elite young pitcher, it still would not be enough. Ken Rosenthal projects the Mariners to score 80 runs, this year, and forever.

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The Mariners might not want to give up on the season before it even starts, which is understandable. But let’s see if their position changes when the team is 20 games out in June.

The only team to fall at least 20 games out in their division last June was the Baltimore Orioles. The Orioles were the worst team in baseball, and they were chasing the Yankees, who were the best team in baseball. Ken Rosenthal thinks the Mariners are going to be an absolute nightmare, which I suppose goes along with his 80-run projection.

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Truth be told, I didn't hate Rosenthal's column as much as I wanted to. I went into it assuming it would be a thousand words of pointless writer speculation, but Rosenthal actually took a firm and somewhat topical stance. Additionally, I think we all on some level understand that there's a rational argument to be made for trading Felix away, and the Yankees are an obvious match.

That said, I've been sitting here making fart noises for an hour. Felix is ours, and you can't have him.