In making a move that's a lot more fun than it is in any way meaningful, the Mariners have signed Moises Hernandez to a minor league contract. Moises Hernandez isn't just a guy with the first name of a good player and the last name of a good player; he's also the older brother of one Felix Hernandez.
And that's my favorite angle, here. Moises Hernandez is Felix's older brother. Moises Hernandez is 26. All signing Moises Hernandez really does for me is issue a reminder that Felix is somehow impossibly still just 24 years old, but thinking about that makes me really happy, so, in a way, signing Moises Hernandez makes me really happy. That automatically makes this a more satisfying move than signing Denny Bautista or Jamey Wright or whoever.
For those of you who're tempted to get ahead of yourselves, don't. Moises shares the genes and upbringing that got Felix into professional baseball, but he doesn't share the genes and upbringing that made Felix good. Moises has been in the minors since 2003, but has made all of ten appearances in AA and one in AAA. He missed all of the 2008 season for reasons I can't track down, and he missed all of the 2010 season for more reasons I can't track down. In 2009, he posted a 5.91 ERA over 35 innings. He's a guy with a decent fastball and a really cool brother, and that's about it.
But still, the brother connection is a neat one, and if having Moises nearby makes Felix's time in ST more enjoyable, then I'm all for it. There's no downside, and this has the potential for epically one-sided pranks.
Felix: :finds locker partially filled with packing peanuts:
Moises: :leaves ST facility pursued by black helicopter; right cleat explodes:
Obligatory Moises Hernandez fun fact: Moises Hernandez was the compensation sent to the Braves when the Orioles hired pitching coach Leo Mazzone. Player compensation for coaching hires is one of my favorite underexplored subjects in baseball.