Part one
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The Seattle Mariners won the World Series.
Just now. Like a minute ago. Just a minute ago, the Seattle Mariners won the World Series.
I'm not going to write anything tonight, and you're not going to read anything tonight, because I'm a Mariners fan, and you're a Mariners fan, and tonight we go crazy, because THE SEATTLE MARINERS WON THE WORLD SERIES
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