Blah blah, they don't matter. I know. People will still talk about them, so talk about them in this meaningless thread. Feel free to not talk about them too. Or whatever.
Just for fun, I listed each player's rank in UZR amongst qualified players at his position for 2009.
P - Mark Buehrle
C - Joe Mauer
1B - Mark Teixeira (7th of 9)
2B - Placido Polanco (1st of 9)
3B - Evan Longoria (1st of 8)
SS - Derek Jeter (5th of 10)
OF - Adam Jones (17th of 34)
OF - Torii Hunter (13th of 34)
OF - Ichiro Suzuki (12th of 34)
Jeff's note: emphasis on "they don't matter." They don't. They don't matter. Do not get up in arms over poor selections, because they don't matter. Matter, they don't. You may think that they matter, but further investigation will reveal that they do not.
Congratulations, Derek Jeter!