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Six line drives and one home run in 2.1 innings of work. Carlos Silva, you may not be the shittiest Mariner pitcher about whom I've ever blogged, but in a matter of months you've rapidly become one of my least favorite.

It's sort of troublesome, too, because no matter what a handful of Angels fans might tell you, I do pride myself on being able to simultaneously remain both emotional and objective, but Silva just makes it so flipping difficult to keep evenhanded. His contract sucks. His skillset sucks. His personality sucks. Carlos Silva the pitcher is a decent back-end starter who can blend in with the 4's and 5's of the world, but I find him so totally loathsome that it's hard to keep my opinions and my evaluations separate. While, generally speaking, I can usually tell when I'm being unfair, the inclination is there to give him a shorter leash than everybody else. And that puts me in a precarious position, because which way do I want to go? On the one hand, he's a half-decent pitcher who doesn't deserve his sky-high ERA, but on the other, oh my god I hate him so much

I guess all I can really do is tip you off that, while I will forever try to stay as objective with Silva as I can, there will be times at which I can't keep myself from ripping into the fat son of a bitch like he ran over my kid, because he's annoying, and I hate him, and I hate what he stands for, and the fact that he's locked up through 2011 with an unmovable contract means we're stuck with him in close quarters, and I defy you to hang out with someone this unpleasant for that long without allowing yourself the occasional snap. It just isn't possible. People need to vent, and Silva makes for a good target, because he's frequently the one who makes me have to vent in the first place. Couldn't you have at least waited a few more months before making me consider adding you to the list of the worst contracts in franchise history? Do you have any positive attributes at all? Good gravy you suck.

Three and a third years left to go. We are living Bill Bavasi's buyer's remorse. For your sake, you better pray you're one of those people who can effectively block out unwanted distractions, because this one's not going anywhere for a long long time.


Biggest Contribution: Kenji Johjima's knee, +14.6%
Biggest Suckfest: JJ Putz, -74.2%
Most Important AB: Vazquez error #3, +39.7%
Most Important Pitch: Vazquez double, -64.0%
Total Contribution by Pitcher(s): -90.7%
Total Contribution by Lineup: -14.1%
Total Contribution by Opposition: +54.8%
(What is this chart?)

No, I don't care how the game ended. You shouldn't either. At this point, the sole purpose of the season is to gather as much information on our own players as possible, and finding out that JJ still has a ways to go before he even dreams of getting back to what he used to be does this organization every bit as much good as finding out that he's back and healthy and better than ever. Forget winning. Here's to the pursuit of knowledge. Noble goals, both, but given our situation, one does far more good than the other.