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Miguel Cairo

Why This Is Good: I uh

Why This Is Bad: ...hmmm

Why This Makes Any Sense At All: if

Why This Merits A Front Page Entry: ...well...

The only fun thing here is that, since we pretty much already had one of these guys on the team thanks to the miracle of genetic cloning, we're all set up to make endless jokes about Willie's non-union Venezuelan equivalent, Señor Bloomquísto. Other than that, whatever. There wasn't any need for a second, tanner helping of utility know-how, but there was no way this team was going to go through the offseason without adding a randomly-generated veteran to the bench, so here we are. On a Disneyland scale of It's A Small World to Splash Mountain, this move rates as the tram in the parking lot.

I did get a kick out of the article on the official website, though.

"Miguel strengthens our bench by giving us another player, along with Willie Bloomquist, who can cover all four infield spots and, in a pinch, the corners of the outfield," general manager Bill Bavasi said in a release. "This should allow [manager John McLaren] more flexibility to use Miguel or Willie earlier in a game, if he wants, and still be covered late."

McLaren: We have a lot of talent on the team right now. I feel like we're only one little adjustment away from really doing something.
Bavasi: Oh yeah? What's that?
McLaren: I'd like to be able to take my starters out sooner.
Bavasi: I'll see what I can do.