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1986 Mariners: Week Two

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The Good Old Days sucked.

11/12: 3-1 loss

11/13: 5-3 loss

11/14: 5-4 loss

11/16: 10-5 loss

11/17: 3-0 non-win

11/18: 10-1 loss

11/19: 7-5 loss

Record: 3-10

The throwback Mariners preferred to hit their Hope Destroyers far earlier than the more recent editions, I guess. This seven-game losing streak drops the team to two back of the actual 1986 season pace (5-8) and six back of the division-leading A's. It's been two weeks and already any lingering sense of even guarded optimism has long since faded away. This team really ought to fire its manager.

The only real noteworthy performances in there were Ken Phelps going 2-4 with a pair of home runs in the most recent embarrassment, and Mike Moore getting the tough-luck complete game loss on the 17th despite fanning seven with zero walks. Seven games and two gold stars. Awesome. And damned if I can't get the simulator to stop using Steve freaking Fireovid all the time.

One thing that I've only now truly come to appreciate is that those 1986 Seattle Mariners were really bad at making contact. Like, really, really bad. The actual team led the league with 1,148 strikeouts, and you better believe that's shown up in the early results of the Strat-O-Matic season; Jim Presley, for example, is on pace to whiff a staggering 299 times. Along with Phelps and Danny Tartabull, the team has not one, not two, but three guys on pace to shatter Ryan Howard's pathetic little future strikeout record of 199. I know it's early, but sweet Mary mother of God is that ever impressive. Who said the M's weren't good at anything?

I think I've gained a whole new respect for those of you who were around to watch this circus 21 years ago. Yeah, the team was young, and there were some guys there who'd go on to do some good things, but the 1986 Seattle Mariners were horrible, and they weren't particularly entertaining. If you were able to make it through that, then I have every faith that you'll be able to handle anything and everything the Bavasi regime sends your way, because no matter what happens, there's just no matching that level of hopelessness. None. That is a point to which I think it'd be impossible for a non-Oriole team to return.

I'll get to the Felix review tomorrow night. How's that for Exhibit A on how far this franchise has come?