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No Mariner News, No Problem

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It's been pretty boring in Marinerland over the past couple weeks, especially since Bavasi hasn't found any mediocre free agents to overpay or declining veterans to trade for. This was the perfect time for Jeff to take his vacation, spending four weeks gallivanting around Europe rarely, if ever, thinking about Mariner baseball while the rest of us still cautiously check sports websites throughout our day hoping that there won't be any new Mariner news.

So with the lack of any new Mariner related news or topics, there hasn't been much for those handling the reins of LoL to talk about. Which leads us to today's post. Yesterday, Positive Paul and I were passing time at our respective jobs shooting the collective breeze when Paul made up a humorous Mariners baseball slogan (listed below) and an idea struck me like JJ Putz fastball to the temple. I figured that with today being a Friday on a short work week following the holidays, it would be a good idea to have a little creative fun and allow everyone to release their frustrations from the current offseason (and even past few seasons) and create their own version of what they believe the 2007 Mariners slogan should be.

So have fun. Here are a couple thrown out there to get those creative juices following:

"Mariners baseball..."

  • "The sound of one-hand clapping." - courtesy of PositivePaul
  • "You'll come for the Willie." - courtesy of PositivePaul
  • "My, oh my." (Actually, this was last years actual quote and it ironically fits)
  • "If the raw fish in the IchiRoll doesn't kill you, the baseball will."
  • "What a show...of incompetence."
  • "Haven't you had enough?"
  • "Sodo Notto." - (Weak translation - Baseball south of downtown smells like crap).
  • This is more of a TV commercial but allow me to set the scene anyway.

    An older woman is sitting in a rocking chair watching a Mariner game. The camera zooms in on the television, showing the bases loaded with Mariners and Adrian Beltre up to bat. The opposing pitcher makes his pitch the screen goes black, the crack of a bat is heard. Dave Niehaus' excited voice follows with:

    "Get out the rye bread and the mustard, Grandma," and the television screen comes back only to show an Adrian Beltre foul out to the first baseman to end the inning. Niehaus continues:

    "and invite the family over for Matlock reruns over salami sandwiches and save them the $200-300 they would've spent at the ballpark."

  • "Get all of it...and then wish you could give it all back."
  • "Come for the baseball, leave with narcolepsy."
  • Enter Don LaFontaine's voice - "Every so often a team of destiny emerges to take the nation by surprise. No, it's not the Mariners; I'm just making an open-ended statement. But please come spend your money anyway."
  • "45% of the time, we win everytime."