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First Half in Review, Again: Passing Out the Grades

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Same format as last year's entry. Copying and pasting the intro:

I was in the process of writing up position-by-position performance reviews when I realized that (A) it was boring, and (B) a lot of the players sucked. So, in lieu of the individual write-ups, here's a team report card, which is a lot easier to slap together, since I don't have to explain myself on the questionable ones:

(Note: defense matters.)

And away we go.

Catcher: B+
First Base: D-
Second Base: A-
Shortstop: C+
Third Base: D
Left Field: A-
Center Field: D
Right Field: B+
Designated Hitter: F
Bench: D
Starting Rotation: C-
Middle Relief: D
Setup: A-
First Closer: F
Second Closer: A+

Top Three Players Most Likely to Improve In The Second Half:

Felix Hernandez
Richie Sexson
Adrian Beltre?

Top Three Players Most Likely to Decline:

Gil Meche
Jamie Moyer
Raul Ibanez

Top Three Minor Leaguers Most Likely to Make an Impact:

Chris Snelling
Adam Jones
Francisco Cruceta

Top Three Players Most Likely to be Somewhere Else Before Long:

Joel Pineiro
Carl Everett
Shin-soo Choo

Top Three Players Most Likely to Carry the Team On Their Back Into the Playoffs:

Ichiro
Kenji Johjima
Chris Snelling

Top Three Players Who Would Provide Immediate Help to a Thin Rotation and Bullpen:

AL pitchers
NL pitchers
Minor league pitchers

Top Three Mariner Farmhands Who Could Open Some Eyes in the Second Half:

Ryan Feierabend
Justin Thomas
Steven Uhlmansiek
(Include Mark Lowe if he ever goes back to the minors)

Let's see your first half report cards in the comment thread.