The signings of Hong-Chih Kuo and Shawn Camp to Major League contracts have restricted the likely openings on the Seattle bullpen for all those candidates that Jack Zduriencik gathered over the winter like an adorable little pika. With those two plus George Sherrill and Brandon League, the consensus is that the bullpen is already taking semi-rigid shape, like the frame of a tent with only the rain flaps and other doodads left to perch on top.

The favorites to make the trip to Japan along with their three-year weighted tRA+s:
Closer: Brandon League (117)
LH short: George Sherrill* (99) [signing link]
RH short: Shawn Camp (96) [signing link]
LH middle: Hong-Chih Kuo* (114) [signing links]
RH middle: Shawn Kelley (130)
LH long: Charlie Furbush* (81)
RH long: Tom Wilhelmsen (107)

The roles laid out are not requirements of course. The Mariners don't need to carry both a left and right-handed long man. The players drive the roles, not the other way around. I find it amusing though how cleanly it breaks down with this group of seven. The back three do not have much Major League experience, so take their weighted tRA+s with more salt than the first four, whom you should still take with quite a bit of salt because they are relievers. It's a lot of salt all together so I suggest having a friend or perhaps a nemesis assist you with the intake. Why salt anyways? Is that implying they are bland tasting or perhaps rotting? This is weird.

On the outside, overhanging but not overshadowing, is Mount Pile:
Steve Delabar
Matt Fox [signing link]
Steve Garrison* [signing link]
Jarrett Grube
Aaron Heilman [signing link]
Sean Henn* [signing link]
Cesar Jimenez* [out of options]
Josh Kinney [signing link]
Lucas Luetge* [rule 5] [selecting link]
Jeff Marquez [signing link]
Chance Ruffin
Scott Patterson [signing link]
Oliver Perez* [signing link]
Phillippe-Alexandre Valiquette* [info link]

There's a few interesting names on that list. And there's a few interesting players on that list. Those two sets overlap but are not identical. I see that some people are puzzled by the Shawn Camp addition coming at the Major League expense of one of the above players, but I am unconcerned and even slightly happy at his coming aboard (nautical term). Perusing Mount Pile, none of those people strike me as substantially more likely than Camp to offer 50 league average innings of relief. The difference between what he's projected to produce and what some combination of rocks would is proabably minimal and ultimately meaningless for 2012's playoff odds, but I don't find that makes Camp a waste.

Camp isn't young and is unlikely to be a meaningful part of any kind of future, but he does provide some depth that I think is useful. It would be really great for the fans if the Mariners avoided a third-consecutive 90-loss season and though Camp isn't going to single-handedly stem that tide (nautical term), he can be one more minor fail safe to prevent a 2010-everyone-sucks-we're-screwed situation from arising again. I wrote previously about my concerns surrounding the lack of quality hitting depth behind the starters and I shared similar reservations about the pitching. Kuo and Camp help to mitigate that. It makes it a little less likely that the bullpen is horrifying in 2012.

My hunch is that if Camp were brought in on another of the minor league contracts plus Spring Training invite deals, then nobody would raise a peep of concern. That it is the guaranteed roster spot that wiggles against some people. That doesn't bother me either for a couple reasons. As Jeff pointed out, Ruffin and Delabar — the two most oft-cited to be left high and dry (nautical term) by Camp's signing — both have very limited time at the Triple-A level so neither would simply be twiddling their thumbs. Ruffin jumped from Double-A to the Majors with Detroit before heading down to their AAA-affilate Toledo for 15 innings. Delabar made a 13-inning pit stop in Tacoma on his third stop of a four-level trip last season that began in High Desert and ended with a whopping seven Major League innings. Neither had the sort of dominant 2011 seasons that suggest some time in Triple-A would go to waste.

More importantly, relievers are volatile creatures by nature of their small sample opportunities and they, being pitchers and being pitchers without the benefit of a weekly routine, tend to get hurt a lot. Shawn Kelley was injured last year. Hong-Chih Kuo was injured last year. George Sherrill was injured last year. By and large (nautical term), the Mariners may not break camp with the absolute best bullpen they could muster, but that means almost nothing. Bullpens fluctuate constantly throughout the season unless they're rolling good and healthy; so if someone like Chance Ruffin starts in Tacoma, there's still little impeding him from being a Mariner come May and a month of relief usage only represents approximately 11 innings of pitching. It's not a big deal.

Twitter link here. Shannon states that it is a Major League deal which means that another 40-man roster spot will have to be opened up. It's weird because so far only Shannon has tweeted it. Usually when there's a transaction, my twitter stream has identical tweets from Shannon, Larry Stone and Greg Johns, followed by Rotoworld linking to those three and then MLBTradeRumors. So far, nothing but Shannon. I hope Larry and Greg aren't dead. Don't be dead, guys.

[11:48 UPDATE] Both Greg Johns and Larry Stone tweet that the Mariners have DFA'd Chris Gimenez and Mike Wilson to make room for Hong-Chih Kuo and Camp. Whew! Still alive.

Shawn Camp is a mid-30s reliever who's been with the Blue Jays for the past four seasons and unfortunately does nothing to add to the Mariners quota of ʃɔn given names. The righty throws a high-80s sinker, a low-80s change and a high-70s slider and succeeds probably how you'd expect, through a combination of ground balls and throwing strikes.

Up until last season, he'd been a quietly effectively bullpen arm. Over the last half-dozen years, Camp's xFIP has stayed in the 3.65-4.00 range, which is fine enough. He's not going to be a transformational figure for the bullpen, but building up depth there is not a bad thing and Camp is better than the pile-type additions we've become used to seeing.

It's not all an adequate plate of noodles though. Since Camp's deal is that he needs to throw strikes, 2011 is a bit worrisome as Camp threw far fewer pitches in the strike zone last year than ever before. Now that didn't translate to a significantly higher walk rate and zone% by itself is not enough to worry about, but it is pause-worthy. Camp also saw his strikeout rate dip from below average (~17%) toward dangerously low (11%) territory which is worth even more pauses. Of course, all the normal warnings about a single year of relief pitching applies so don't freak out and go all Harold Pinter on us, but his fastball speed did dip a little so perhaps it's a harbinger of disappointment to come.

Camp is a bit of a side-tosser so he comes equipped with the enhanced platoon splits module that you really didn't want anyway but can be useful in some circumstances. In a certain light, Shawn Camp is the chiral George Sherrill. So hooray for probably many more mid-inning pitching changes this upcoming season. Those are fun, right? Everybody likes those!

Yesterday, while artificial giants brought an official end to another season of concussing one another, we talked a lot about free agent reliever Hong-Chih Kuo. The Mariners were linked to free agent reliever Hong-Chih Kuo, see, and a later report went so far as to say the Mariners were expected to sign him.

Rumor was, there was a small handful of West Coast teams sniffing Kuo to see if they liked it. One of those teams was probably the Angels, since the Angels have long been searching for help in the bullpen. How could the Mariners compete with the Angels as a potential free agent destination? Here's how, courtesy of Dylan Hernandez:

Source: Former #Dodgers reliever Hong-Chih Kuo has signed a one-year, major-league contract with the Seattle #Mariners.

Guaranteed money is how. Given what he went through in 2011, it would've made a lot of sense for Kuo to end up signing a minor league contract. The Mariners made a commitment, and while I'll freely admit that this is speculation, I wouldn't be surprised if that's what put the Mariners over the top. One notes that this signing isn't yet official, but that isn't reason to believe that Hernandez's source is wrong. We knew about Kevin Millwood before that was official. We knew about Munenori Kawasaki before that was official. We learned about Darren Ford from his sister, and so on. It's just about an absolute certainty that Kuo has signed, and that all that's left is troubleshooting the fax machine, or writing up the press release.

Or identifying somebody on the 40-man roster to ditch. As Kuo is signing a Major League contract, the Mariners will have to make room, seeing as how their 40-man roster is currently full. Mike Wilson is one option to go. Cesar Jimenez is another option to go. The Mariners could return Rule 5 pick Lucas Luetge, I think. It shouldn't be hard to fit Kuo in. If it were hard to fit Kuo in, that would imply that the Mariners have too much high-level talent. Good news!

With the Internet being what it is today, and since we heard about Kuo before, I don't really have much in the way of new material for this. Most of what needs to be said about Kuo has already been said. I guess nothing really needs to be said about Kuo. "Need" is one of those words on which people carelessly trample like a Mount Rainier wildflower. If you're all about volatility and high potential reward, Kuo's a neat fit. He could be terrible, like he was last season. He could bounce back from his anxiety and his elbow problems and be amazing, like he was the season before. Kuo could quite literally pitch to either extreme, and I'd much rather the Mariners sign a guy like this than, say, a guy like Jamey Wright or Luis Ayala. The upside is considerable, and the downside is practically irrelevant. If he's bad, oh no, the Mariners might miss the playoffs!

Since I've little more to say, here are a few Kuo factoids:

(1)
Dodgers trainers referred to him as "the Cockroach" because he kept coming back and nothing could kill him. He's fought through several elbow issues. He's fought through shoulder issues. He's fought through anxiety. This article from 2010 says Kuo needs six or seven hours of prep each day before he can pitch. The thing about cockroaches is that if you step on them they die. They make a mess but they are dead. So hopefully Hong-Chih Kuo doesn't get stepped on.

(2)
Hong-Chih Kuo hit a home run, in 2007, off of John Maine. Here is proof. Hong-Chih Kuo has more home runs against John Maine than the Giants do. He hit it on the first pitch. The pitch before, Maine allowed a home run to Matt Kemp. The pitch before that, Maine allowed a home run to Wilson Betemit. Hong-Chih Kuo has a higher career OPS than Michael Saunders.

On Kuo, in a story from June 2007:

Tsao said he faced Kuo a few times in high school but never gave him any pitches to hit.

"I wouldn't throw him any strikes, because he was always trying to hit a home run," Tsao said. "He still reminds me about his team winning the championship."

(3)
According to Hit Tracker, Kuo's home run had a distance of 431 feet. That's longer than any home run ever hit by Jose Lopez. That's longer than any home run ever hit by Dustin Pedroia. That is a legitimately tattooed home run. That is a home run worthy of a bat flip.

(4)
For his career, after getting ahead 0-2, Kuo has one walk and 136 strikeouts. That walk was issued to Adam LaRoche with the bases loaded.

This news first broke some time ago. You'll forgive me for not immediately jumping to my blogging battle station. I saw it, I thought about it, and I decided I didn't need to hurry to get something up because Carlos Guillen traffic isn't going to blow up the website. I used that time to do something I deemed more important, which turned out to be making lemonade from concentrate. I haven't yet tried any of the lemonade. Maybe after this post!

At last week's media luncheon, Jack Zduriencik said that the Mariners weren't necessarily done for the offseason, but that any subsequent additions would probably be small chips. There was expressed interest in finding some kind of veteran bat who could lend the group of position players some experience. Zduriencik might have known then that he'd be signing Carlos Guillen.

Maybe he didn't. But he's now signed Carlos Guillen, to a minor league contract with a spring training invite. It's not the most surprising of transactions, given that we heard reports connecting Guillen and the Mariners back in early December. Those of you wondering who's going to be this year's Adam Kennedy? Carlos Guillen is the new favorite to be this year's Adam Kennedy.

If he makes the team. That's not guaranteed. It's never guaranteed. Even Ichiro isn't guaranteed to make the team. Think about it. Guaranteed. Carlos Guillen has much lower chances of making the team than Ichiro does, but Ichiro doesn't have a 100% chance of making the team. It's kind of hard to tell where Guillen could fit. The team obviously signed him because they have some possible fit in mind, but how versatile is Guillen, really, after all of his injuries? There's easy space if the Mariners go with a six-man bullpen, but will the Mariners go with a six-man bullpen? And on and on. Maybe Guillen makes the team. Maybe he doesn't, immediately. Maybe he doesn't, ever.

If he does make the team, it's important to understand that you shouldn't expect too much. Guillen used to be a Mariner, as you recall. Then he became good. Between 2004-2008, he posted a 127 OPS+. He's posted a 95 OPS+ since in limited time, with his time being limited due to injuries. Carlos Guillen has had a lot of injuries. He's 36, now, so it's not like the injury-proneness is going to go away.

A healthy Guillen can provide some kind of defensive versatility and decent offense from both sides of the plate. A slightly less healthy Guillen is probably the normal Guillen these days. An unhealthy Guillen doesn't play.

Except for that one time! You knew you weren't getting out of this post without me going back to the old story about Carlos Guillen playing through tuberculosis. Before the 2001 season, Guillen was at his home in Venezuela. In spring training, he tested negative for tuberculosis according to a test that apparently has a fairly high error rate. Guillen started the season slow, and on May 19th he collided with Al Martin, with Martin ending up concussed.

Guillen progressively felt worse and worse. People figured he was suffering the after-effects of the collision. He didn't say anything to Lou Piniella. It's around now that I'm going to begin with the blockquotes. Ken Daley:

Every morning Carlos Guillen woke up and wondered how he was going to play a baseball game that night.

His head ached. His chest felt almost bruised, as if he had been taking hard jabs the night before. His cough had turned his throat as raw as sandpaper.

His sheets were damp from the fever he was running. And the bed, which had become his haven, was becoming harder and harder to leave.

Seattle P-I:

Teammates said he had been ill and had occasional nosebleeds, but he hadn't complained to manager Lou Piniella or team coaches.

Pitcher Jose Paniagua said Guillen had been sick for about three months and had told him he suspected the blood he was losing was from his lungs, and not his nose.

Further:

Piniella thought Guillen's performance was a tad lackadaisical during the team's trip to Texas last week, and asked coach Dave Myers to talk with the shortstop. Guillen did not offer illness as an excuse. He merely told Myers, "I'll pick it up."

KOMO:

Because tuberculosis is a contagious disease that spreads through the air like the common cold, the Mariners players were concerned about their own health and the health of their children.

Carlos Guillen was severely ill. He was severely ill, and getting iller, for months. He didn't say anything to the team, even when presented with an opportunity. And the team, for its part, somehow didn't notice. The Seattle Mariners weren't worried too much about their ill regular shortstop and were surprised when tests in late September revealed tuberculosis. Tuberculosis! That Guillen had been playing through for months!

Guillen put up an 87 OPS+ that year over 140 games. The year before, he had an 86 OPS+. His numbers in the second half were better than his numbers in the first half. He was batting .439 in September before he went to the hospital and found out he had tuberculosis.

Tuberculosis!

The Carlos Guillen story is insane. I can't believe that happened. I can't believe that happened the same year the Mariners won 116 games. Guillen returned to play in the ALCS half a month later. Given all of the injuries Guillen has faced over his career, I'm sure there are a lot of people who think he's a wimp. Carlos Guillen isn't a wimp, to the point where he endangered his own life.

The Carlos Guillen tuberculosis story is old now. He doesn't have tuberculosis anymore. (We think.) What he has is an assortment of skills that is a lesser assortment of skills than he used to have. Maybe he still has enough to contribute. Maybe he doesn't. The Mariners will decide on that within a couple of months.

It's Friday night. You and your partner have plans. You've been looking forward to them because you've both had really bad weeks and this'll be a chance to unwind. She's done getting ready and you're just about to shut down the computer when you see that Lookout Landing just put up a new post. "One minute, one minute" you say and you click through, only to find that it's a post about Brian Sweeney signing a minor league contract, and not even signing a minor league contract with an invitation to spring training. A minor league contract, just. You get upset with yourself. You get upset with me. You miss your reservation. The night is ruined. You get upset with Brian Sweeney. "How could you do this to us, Brian Sweeney!"

That's 131 words right there. I'm squeezing some juice out of this old, dry lemon. That way we can have pure, unsweetened lemon juice. Perfect for waking up the tongue or getting out stains.

So anyway, this comes courtesy of Greg Johns. Minor league contract, no invite. I don't know why he didn't get an invite, but it's not like he would've made the team anyway so this way he gets a head start on minor league camp. I'm guessing that, unlike a lot of minor league contracts with invites, this one doesn't include an opt-out date. Sweeney knows damn well he's going to Tacoma. He knows damn well that's where he's spending his season. He's okay with that. Maybe he's eager for that.

I should say that Sweeney's going back to Tacoma because he was there in 1999, 2000, 2002, 2003, and 2010. In case you've forgotten about Brian Sweeney, who got some time with the Mariners in 2010, he's 37 years old. He was born in the same month as Doug Mientkiewicz and Derek Jeter. He's accomplished a little bit less than them. In his baseball career, anyway. He might really like it in Tacoma. He might have a lot of friends there. He spent most of last year in Buffalo so he's probably most happy to just not be there.

I'm still writing about Brian Sweeney. This post is going on its fifth paragraph. Like hell am I stopping now. He's the rare righty with a sub-90 fastball. Lots of breaking balls and changeups from this guy. Makes him tricky for lesser-developed hitters. Not so tricky for more developed hitters. About that time with the Mariners in 2010 - in Sweeney's first 7.2 innings, he had seven strikeouts. In his last 29.1 innings, he had seven strikeouts.

So he's not a big league weapon. He's a triple-A guy, and he's pretty good there, and he might well be happy there. Jack Zduriencik has talked about the importance of having veterans in the Majors to serve as mentors to youth. There's no reason to think he's wrong, and it stands to reason that there's also value in having veterans in the minors to serve as mentors to youth. Brian Sweeney's not a prospect, but maybe he can help prospects. Maybe he can help a guy with his changeup. Maybe he can help a guy with his preparation. Who knows what Brian Sweeney could do?

Sweeney's put in a lot of time with Tacoma, but this'll be his first visit to Cheney Stadium since it was renovated. All right, it looks better! Also it's more hitter-friendly. Godspeed!

Still writing. Okay. In Sweeney's Major League debut, back in 2003, he pitched in relief of Joel Pineiro. The first batter he faced was Damian Jackson. His first strikeout victim was Todd Walker. Remember when the Red Sox had Damian Jackson and Todd Walker? And Gabe Kapler and Scott Williamson? For additional reference, their top prospect before the season started was Hanley Ramirez. He was followed by Kelly Shoppach.

Incidentally, Sweeney wasn't drafted. As a 22-year-old he pitched for Lafayette of the Heartland League. He was signed by the Mariners in September 1996. He's the only player from that Lafayette team to reach the bigs. The scout that first noticed him and was responsible for bringing him into the organization? A certain Northeast area scout by the name of Tom McNamara. I knew if I kept writing I'd get to something good. McNamara saw something in Sweeney more than 15 years ago, and McNamara's probably the reason that Sweeney's back now.

So about that four-player Mariners/Yankees trade - I decided to sit in on the Mariners media conference call without participating, which is way less awkward and uncomfortable on the phone than it is in person at an actual press conference. I'm not going to review all the bits and quotes because others will do that and they'll do it better, but there was one thing in particular early on that stood out to me.

The Mariners were looking all around the league for a young bat. Somebody they could bring in and keep for a while. They had a few options, but in the end they "settled on Jesus" (different from "settled for Jesus"). Jack Zduriencik asked Brian Cashman if there was any way to get Montero without trading Felix Hernandez, and that's where Michael Pineda came in. Pineda wasn't being shopped, but he was available at the right price, which is exactly what one would've figured.

From there, things developed, although they didn't necessarily develop that fast - the seed was first planted during the winter meetings, and then I guess it sprouted a few weeks ago. No, that doesn't sound right. It first came up during the winter meetings. Then it came up again a few weeks ago. Much better. Writing is easy!

As for Montero's future as a catcher, the quote you've probably seen all over the place is that he'll "get every opportunity to catch." The way Zduriencik tells it, they'll go to camp and let things play out as they will. So Montero could catch, and if you ask Brian Cashman he will catch, but his big selling point as far as the Mariners are concerned is most definitely his bat. They love the hell out of his bat.

Somebody always has to ask during these things what comes next, and Zduriencik always has to remind people that he won't talk about current negotiations. But for those of you who love to be teased, he did say that he has "other conversations going on." All that really says is that Jack Zduriencik isn't flat-out ignoring other executives and agents, but watch how little you care. What other conversations! How many of them involve Prince Fielder! I'm using exclamation points instead of question marks because the people who are still obsessed with the Mariners signing Prince Fielder probably don't understand punctuation.

Trade! It's done. Jesus Montero will be present at FanFest. He'll be bringing his big bat. It is a huge bat.

Two Fridays ago - ten days - we learned that the Mariners were going to send Michael Pineda and Jose Campos to the Yankees for Jesus Montero and Hector Noesi. There were some delays, and Montero couldn't get to Seattle for his physical until this past weekend. He underwent a battery of tests, and there was no sign of the hype virus, or Eric Duncan Syndrome as it's known in some circles. So Montero was cleared, and now, at last, the trade is official.

I don't have anything to add at the moment that I or Matthew haven't already said. Yay, Montero is neat. Yay, Noesi is neat. Boo, Pineda was good, and boo, Campos could be good. Of interest is Jack Zduriencik's statement, which is a sentence fragment I can't believe I typed. On Noesi:

It is also beneficial that we were able to acquire a Major League- ready pitcher with six years of control and who will compete for a spot in our rotation.

So the Mariners see Noesi as a starter, like we figured. Good, that's the right thing. On Montero:

With this trade we feel we have acquired a premium offensive talent that has the potential to hit in the middle of our lineup and grow with our other young players [...]

Through our evaluations, we've identified the strength of our organization to be pitching depth, and this helped in our decision to acquire what we consider a premium bat and a potential starting pitcher [...]

Zduriencik talks about Montero being a talented bat, as he should, but he doesn't say anything about Montero being a catcher. Zduriencik didn't say that much so maybe this doesn't mean anything - maybe he just felt like praising Montero's offense - but it got my attention. This is the first public word on the trade from the Mariners' end (I think), and it could be a sign that they don't see Montero as a backstop.

Or maybe they do. I don't know. We'll all know more very very shortly, after Zduriencik and Montero go on a media conference call.

I went to breakfast, which was fine, but which would have been better had it been served with basil oil instead of basil aioli, like the menu said. I came back and checked Twitter, and I had a message linking to this post, saying the M's were signing Kevin Millwood. That post links to this article. That article refers to a Facebook account belonging to Kevin Millwood's sister. So, the source:

I don't know why I blacked out the name since the article cited her name, allowing me to track her down in the first place, but I guess I'm just really dedicated to protecting my sources. More importantly, did you notice how I began this post by talking about my breakfast? The shit I get away with.

So this isn't anything official, obviously, and nobody else has come forth to issue confirmation, but one would think that Kevin Millwood's sister would be a reliable source. Millwood's kind of a small fish in this offseason, and the Mariners have been reported to have interest before, so it makes sense. I would expect - not guarantee, but expect - that we'll hear more about this very shortly.

Let's assume that it's true. Let's assume that, if the Mariners haven't signed Kevin Millwood, they've all but signed Kevin Millwood. Why Kevin Millwood?

Because the starting rotation could use a Kevin Millwood, or somebody like a Kevin Millwood. In truth it could use somebody better than a Kevin Millwood, but I can't imagine that Roy Oswalt would sign with Seattle on purpose, and I don't think the Mariners want to guarantee Edwin Jackson a bunch of years. And Jeff Francis is, whatever. So, Millwood. Millwood would slide in behind Felix Hernandez and Jason Vargas. Hisashi Iwakuma could be good, but he's far from a sure thing. Hector Noesi could be good, but last year he started seven games. Charlie Furbush could be good, but he needs work. Blake Beavan doesn't miss bats. And so on. Millwood's insurance. He's a luxury, if you can call him that, if Iwakuma and Noesi work out, but if one or both of them don't, well, good thing about Millwood.

Also Millwood is really old, so people think of him as a leader. He's fourth among active pitchers in career innings, and I don't think Javier Vazquez should count as an active pitcher. A search for "Kevin Millwood" + "mentor" turns up this article:

[The Orioles] also desired a leader in the clubhouse.

That's why Millwood's locker sits between Chris Tillman (21) and Brian Matusz (23). And why he's within earshot of Brad Bergesen (24). It didn't happen by accident.

Since the Orioles acquired Millwood, Tillman, Matusz and Bergesen have combined to allow 403 runs in 612 innings, good for a 5.93 RA. Positive influence!

That isn't fair. I'm sure Millwood has some useful things to say and demonstrate. He's probably not the best mentor in sports, but he's probably not a selfish disaster, so he can help out. Keep in mind that Eric Wedge managed Millwood with the Indians in 2005. Millwood posted a 2.86 ERA, and the Indians won 93 games. I'm guessing Wedge has good things to say about Kevin Millwood, even if Kevin Millwood is no longer what he was as a younger man.

Oh hey there we are, confirmation! Jon Heyman:

Millwood has deal with #mariners

And here's even more!

millwood deal is minor-league deal but has good chance to make team. wedge & p. coach carl willis were w/ "wood'' in cleve

Forgot about the Carl Willis angle. The minor league contract part is interesting, since Millwood reportedly turned down a guaranteed contract from the Rockies earlier in the offseason, but Millwood's probably going to make the team, and he's probably going to make $1 million or $2 million or something as a part of the team. The minor league contract protects the Mariners if Millwood is terrible in Arizona, but you have to figure he's got a great chance.

So how's Millwood going to pitch? I just realized I haven't really gotten into that. He will probably pitch decently. Don't be thrown by his low walk rate last year - that isn't real. He'll throw fastballs in the high 80s, other things below the high 80s, and he'll generally be okay. He projects for an FIP in the mid-4s, which sounds about right. He'll benefit from Safeco, which is an uninteresting point to make given that any and every pitcher would benefit from Safeco. Even a position player or you would benefit from Safeco, in the event that a position player or you were pitching there.

Millwood will throw 105 pitches a game and do veterany things. He'll get credit for things that don't show up in the box score, and the things that do show up in the box score will most likely be unremarkable. Assuming Millwood's okay around midseason and assuming the Mariners are out of the race, he could and should be an easy guy to flip for a toolsy double-A outfielder or a Dominican teenager with a live arm. That is, if younger guys are knocking on the rotation's door. Millwood could also last the whole year if he gets hurt or if things don't go as intended.

Kevin Millwood. So many of us wanted him years ago. We're getting him now. It's kind of like girls from high school. It's kind of exactly like girls from high school. He's not what he was, but he's not entirely unappealing and he can be interesting for a short amount of time until you look for something more permanent.

He's right-handed by the way.