FanPost

Write Your Own 2014 Commercial

One of the annual things to look forward to at this time of year is the shooting and then unveiling of that year's commercials. Read into that what you will, regarding competitiveness of the team. I imagine it's something like being hyped for the Super Bowl because you like the halftime show. Or, "the winter Olympics are here again - ooo, curling highlights!".

I personally do not have high hopes that they can top the Brendan Ryan Buffalo commercial for sheer delightful absurdity. The Felix/Larry thing is officially played out. We no longer have Ichiro or Edgar spots to look forward to. I imagine the first Cano spot will be some sort of rite of passage, and that I will sort of smirk at it, but my favorite will be something else totally random. (Unless of course they all suck.)

Anyway, I thought it might be spiffy to make a one-off space... buried deep down in the FanPosts where no one will ever, ever find it... to take a break from reminding ourselves how little spring training stats matter for the umpteenth time, to let those creative juices flow.

(Which always seemed like such a disgusting image, really. Creativity should be more like *bamf* puff of smoke and then you have a bunny rabbit. "Creative juices" as a phrase really goes down some disturbing paths if you take it to a logical conclusion about where the juices might come from, where they're applied, how one collects them, whether they're intended to be splashed, poured, consumed... great googly moogly, I can't write these things before breakfast, ew....)

In the comments, please do write up a 2014 Mariners commercial. That's it. That's the prompt. Whatever says "2014 M's" to you. Players past, present and future. Straight riff on commercials past or something new. Something they really SHOULD do as an honest commercial, or something we're likely to see. Write a 2014 commercial in the best shape of your life!

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