Brad Miller, blessed may he be, is by a major margin my most beloved Mariner middle infielder. Maybe my bro Nick Franklin will miraculously break with his mildly bad ball-missing mindset, and maybe the masculine but bland Dustin Ackley batted better in college, but my belief is that Brad Miller beats 'em both by miles.
Brandon Maurer isn't as multiverse-beating as Miller, but I maintain: brash Mariners buffs berate Maurer more than is mandatory. Maurer might've been bad in the Majors for many blasted, miserable months, but be that as it may I'm bullish on my main man B. Brandon has many biting pitches, much bravado, and a manly beard. And today, before millions (maybe that's bullshit), Maurer beat up the marvelous Boakland Mathletics. Brad Miller, mentioned before, boosted his bro Brandon magnificently by many means. Boy, Brandon and Brad make me believe the M's might be much better next March!
Maybe my belief'll be betrayed by bureaucratic morons, but in this miracle moment, Brad Miller and Brandon Maurer have bolstered my morale. These mega-badass BMs might be the best Mariners.
- Thesaurus.com is amazing and I am incredibly grateful that it exists.
- When Brad Miller hit his first two home runs in the same game, Joey Cora went on record saying that he'd never do it again. He did it again, less than a month later. He did it again, again, today. Brad Miller has eight home runs, and six of them came in pairs. Joey Cora should probably not go to Las Vegas.
- Miller's first home run of the night was a pretty pedestrian affair, as home runs go - poked out to the tarp in right field just after a Nick Franklin baserunning screwup that I'll discuss in more detail later. The second one, though, was a jaw-dropper.
- Good lord, he turned around on that quickly. That wasn't a magnificent home run in the Yoenis Cespedes sense, but it got out of the field of play absurdly fast. Look at that swing! That's a stupidly quick swing. Miller just waits, and waits, and then unloads on the ball. And it gets out of the field in about three seconds. Sheesh.
- Justin Smoak hit his twentieth home run of the season today, making this the first season since 2007 that the Mariners have had at least four players hit twenty home runs. I'll say one thing for Jack Z: he set out to get home runs, and he got home runs. If the goal of the year was to prove that dingers can be hit in Safeco Field, mission accomplished. Now we just have to hope that he can shift his affections from "players who have power" to "players who are actually good".
- Yoervis Medina had another Yoervis Medina inning in the bottom of the eighth, allowing two walks and a double but also getting a groundout and two K's. Ryan Divish said it best:
I will be having nightmares about the #Mariners bullpen long after the season is over.— Ryan Divish (@RyanDivish) September 28, 2013
- At some point between his last appearance and this one, Danny Farquhar decided to cut his hair and shave his beard. He looks fine, but I confess myself a little bit disappointed. The previous hair ensemble might not've been very closer-y, but it added to his quirky appeal as a combination relief pitcher / home run dancer. New Farquhar looks more like an intimidating reliever, but less like a fun guy.
- Nick Franklin made a bit of a baserunning mistake today, trying to stretch a double into a triple when Josh Reddick botched a play in right field. Unfortunately, it turned out that Reddick was using my old Backyard Baseball 2001 gambit of deliberately bobbling the ball to induce opponent overconfidence; after a ridiculously good relay, Franklin was tagged out at third. The weird thing is that Franklin probably would've been safe if he'd gone in hands-first, but for some reason he decided to dive in with his arms on either side of the bag and make first contact with his chest. It didn't work.
- I ended my first recap of 2013 by making fun of Eric Sogard, who wears glasses. I hereby end my last recap of 2013 by pointing out that Eric Sogard has a 96 OPS+. Nick Franklin has a 94 OPS+, and Dustin Ackley's is 89. In 2013, Dustin Ackley and Nick Franklin have been worse hitters than a guy who wears glasses. That sums up the season nicely, I think.