[sound of man pouring beer]
With so much drama in the MLB
It's kinda hard bein' a fan of Seattle's team
Somehow some way
Keep on sitting down to root them on like every single day.
Maybe I, have a death wish for my dreams
Or, can't figure out which other teams, to
View in the morning while the M's are still slumping
And Seattle is "home."
Plus they've got pitchers in the minor leagues that may get the call
And a few not bad prospects that can still hit the ball. (still hit the ball)
So what else can I do, shit.
I've got a closet full of liquors and my home boys do too.
So turn on Root Sports and drink some more
Watch (for what?), this is the team you chose. yeah =(
So we keep watchin' them trounce the M's
9 up 9 down starting every 7:10 PM.
[Chorus: Repeat 2x}
Keepin' on the TV, watching M's blow, sippin' on microbrews.
Laid back (with my mind on Dustin Ackley and Dustin Ackley on my mind).
Now that they got them some singles in.
Everybody got on base but they can't hit'm in.
Now this type of shit happens all the time.
It's like they treat scoring runs like it's a violent crime.
"Everything is fine" when you're listening to the GMZ.
Despite Saunders' injured shoulder and Mike Morse's pinky
If you listen, to the words that he speak
It's like some dingus took his brain and he can no longer think
And so he made this team worse than the A's (A's?)
And let Ibanez play every day (oh that itch?)
Can't hit lefties, plays defense like there's bees
Should join the retirees, but they claim that he leads
Most of them shouldn't be in the major leagues.
… Jesus, (and Justin)…
So they're "Ready to Play"
Then they came around and hit like they belong in Triple-A.
Yet they play every day, especially blokes like Justin Smoak, shit he's such a joke.
He has a few weak groundball hits and warning track power.
Not a single dinger and runs a mile an hour.
At least there ain't no stoppin', Seager keeps Poppin'
And Felix got some pitches that Shoppach ain't droppin'
So sadly, it looks like I just can't stop.
Cause I can't leave the M's - even though they seem to flop.
So I… won't get upset after each and every loss.
At least I love the M's, the King and Boss
And I'll be…