Mariners Rained Out

The Mariners had the Indians right where they wanted them. With two outs and two men on in the bottom of the first, Erik Bedard had worked through the first four of Cleveland's lineup to bring up Travis Hafner. While Hafner was Cleveland's hero from last night, he is cursed to only be able to bat from the left side of the plate and thus Erik Bedard was mere seconds from doing away with him in a light-hearted and fancy-free manner.

The Mariners, by contrast, went down in order in their half of the first inning. That ensured that they would still have powerful bats due up in the second inning. Meanwhile, having exhausted five hitters in their half, the Indians had a much more pathetic slate of batters to feebly attack Bedard and the Mariners with in the second. The advantage was clearly on the side of Seattle when an unanticipated event occurred.

Despite weather experts forecasting extended and permanent sunshine until the end of days and even though 15 minutes prior there had not been a cloud within visual range of the entire state of Ohio, a rainstorm brewed up suddenly and with no warning. The rains fell and fell and despite the earnest protestations of the Seattle players, who remarked that it was but a mere drizzle, the Indians seized quickly upon the flimsiest of pretenses and got the game postponed.

In the aftermath of this devastating horror, attention eventually turned to who to blame. And in an unfortunate turn of events, Brandon League was an easily staked scapegoat. As it turns out, League was entertained by the pregame and, as he is wont to do, did a little dance shuffle to some pregame music going on over the public address system. Unfortunately for the Mariners, the impromptu shuffle that League performed was actually an ancient Hawaiian rain dance. That dance single-handedly ruined the Mariners chances of breaking their losing streak and so therefore we can all join together to blame Brandon League even more for this pernicious draw. What a hoser.

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