The Joy Of Being Petty
by Jeff Sullivan on Mar 29, 2011 6:33 PM PDT
in Miscellaneous
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PrintHad you asked me around a week ago about my favorite story of the spring, I would've thought for a little while before spitting out something pretty predictable. The emergence of Michael Pineda, perhaps, or the rise of Tom Wilhelmsen. Maybe the improved play of Milton Bradley or the health and success of Erik Bedard. There were a number of story lines to choose from, all of them exciting for any Mariners fan to imagine.
But a lot can happen in a week. A lot can happen in just a few days. And I think watching the way the whole Carlos Silva saga played out in Chicago has given me a new #1.
For those of you who haven't paid attention, Silva came to camp insisting that he had a rotation slot locked up, even though he didn't. He promptly showed up out of shape, put up some of the worst numbers in baseball and lost out on the #5 gig. When the Cubs asked him if he'd accept a temporary trip to the minor leagues, Silva refused and ripped the organization for allegedly misleading him, so the organization called him delusional and released him outright. Most of this happened over the weekend.
The word that comes to mind is 'delicious'. After everything we went through when Silva was a Mariner, and after seeing him pitch so well in last year's first half and hearing about it so often, his subsequent crash and burn has been a riot. When I mentioned Silva's release to Matthew the other day we spent the next five minutes talking in that way where neither of us was laughing, but any listener could tell that we'd been laughing just before. It was such a fitting turn of events. Such a Silva turn of events.
When I first realized how much I was enjoying this story, I caught myself. I reminded myself that Silva had nothing to do with the Mariners anymore. This wasn't even like laughing at Kendrys Morales' crippling home run celebration last year, since that directly hurt the Angels. Silva and the Cubs aren't rivals. They're nothing, and I wondered if I was just being petty.
What I've come to realize, though, is that while I am being petty, pettiness is nothing to ignore or deny. All any of us want out of life is to spend as much of it as we can being happy, and sure enough, pettiness is one route for which we all have directions. We all delight at a nasty ex's misfortune. We all laugh when the lane weaver gets caught in traffic. And I think we all, to a person, found the Silva story to be just the funniest God damn thing we'd heard all month.
The capacity for pettiness is innate. If it weren't, we wouldn't all feel the way we do. And I think we've evolved this way because pettiness is one means by which we can spend a few extra seconds of each day with smiles on our faces. It doesn't matter if it makes you feel a little bit dirty or a little bit guilty. Those feelings don't overwhelm the joy.
The ability to find occasional delight in being bitter is programmed into our genes, and any Mariners fan that climbs aboard his horse and accuses the rest of us of being immature is missing out on an opportunity to have fun in the mud. Life only gives us so many chances to be happy. Baseball only gives us so many chances to be happy. Those chances need to be seized, however they can be seized.
Don't deny it. Don't push it away. Embrace it. Embrace your pettiness. So what if the Carlos Silva chapter in Seattle has long since closed? Carlos Silva is a big ol bitch who pitched and talked himself out of a job, and all those fans in Chicago get to deal with the mess that he made. That shit's hilarious.
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I don't even care about the Cubs fans angle so much
it’s just Carlos fuckin Silva.
by Jeff Sullivan on Mar 29, 2011 6:44 PM PDT up reply actions
I didn't either until Milton took his Milton time last season.
Cubs nation was not too cool about that.
I hope he decides to fly small planes in his spare time.
...and now I'm here
by CapSea on Mar 29, 2011 6:47 PM PDT reply actions 17 recs
To paraphrase an awesome author
“He felt good, but then immediately felt guilty. Soon after he felt good about feeling guilty and so returned to his original reaction with the moral high ground.”
by Fett42 on Mar 29, 2011 6:49 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
To redeem himself, at some point Fett needs to go to a game dressed as The Luggage.
Dawg! He put da team on his back!
by JAH on Mar 29, 2011 9:40 PM PDT up reply actions 4 recs
As long as he doesn't act like the luggage
I’M LOYAL TO YOU!!! NO, I’M NOT TRYING TO HURT YOUR OWNER, REALLY!!!
Boba is just a clone of Jango anyways.
by Patrick Stites on Mar 30, 2011 2:36 PM PDT up reply actions
We still have something to do with him
“Silva’s contract also includes a $2 million buyout of a 2012 option, which the Mariners are responsible for paying at the end of the season. "
http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/news/story?id=6263903
Eyes?
Fuck that big fat man.
"Retarded isn't a race." -Thingray
by Matt Erickson on Mar 29, 2011 7:05 PM PDT up reply actions
I don't think I would've enjoyed this as much
If there weren’t a few people last year who relished rubbing Silva’s success in my face (as an M’s fan) while Milton Bradley imploded.
Screw you, Silva. And screw you, few people. :)
It tastes so sweet.
I think this is a good omen for Milton’s season, I really do.
I feel petty
oh, so petty
That the cetty should give me its key.
A committee
Should be organized to honor me.
by msb on Mar 29, 2011 7:15 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
I think in addition to the pettiness there must be a little I told you so smugness there
at the time of the trade, I believe each fanbase was convinced that they were getting rid of the more troublesome player. Milton’s had problems, but they have been personal. Silva’s been the worse teammate.
by Bearskin Rugburn on Mar 29, 2011 7:35 PM PDT reply actions
I love having a big can of "shut the fuck up, dickhead"
for everyone who says anything about the trade that doesn’t begin with “sunk cost.” This isn’t quiet pettiness, more like tit-for-tat in a stupid game of results based analysis.
quite...
not quiet.
It may be quiet pettiness.
Carlos is anti-awesome.
Sarcasm. Just to give everyone a real story about what type of a person he is, two years ago my wife and I went to the Tampa Bay series (in Tampa). We got the series tickets the day they went on sale. I was fortunate enough to front row tickets next to the bullpen. Totally excited and decked out in M’s gear we went to the first game.
After the first inning I noticed pumpkin seeds being flicked 10 yards onto the field. It was Silva and his lame buddy Mark Lowe trying to flick the seeds the farthest.
They sooned tired of this after two innings
by Sizzeth VanDammage on Mar 29, 2011 7:38 PM PDT via mobile reply actions
At that point, they turned their attention to flicking them at my wife. When they would hit her, they would look away like it was someone else.
This got to the point where we couldnt even pay attention to the game. I wont even go into the fact it was my wifes first mlb game.
That guy just has great character. And that is putting it nicely.
by Sizzeth VanDammage on Mar 29, 2011 7:42 PM PDT via mobile up reply actions
In order to force myself out of bed as quickly as possible in the morning, I set the radio to ESPN.
As a resident of Chicago, I am subjected to all sorts of homer chatter in the minute or so it takes me to get my bearings, scream “NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooOO” and leap out of bed to make the voices stop. Since the trade, I’ve heard quite a bit of idiotic bluster regarding how Bradley was a cancer and sunk the team and how the Cubs robbed the Mariners. I’ve even had several classmates attempt to rub the trade in my face*. That’s what makes it delicious to me.
*Cubs fans are just a special breed. Man do they love the Garza trade.
Rub your classmates faces...
…in the special Chicago brand of crap that Cant’ Stop the Bleeding dug up.
by Ugly Dickshot on Mar 30, 2011 12:27 AM PDT up reply actions
I can only hope that, in years to come, anti-Oliver Perez sentiment among us Mets fans
remains as strong as anti-Carlos Silva sentiment is among you guys.
"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.
AA Gamethread Embiggening Record Holder- 453 posts (10/03/10)
3rd Place- 2011 AAOP Contest
by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Mar 29, 2011 8:23 PM PDT reply actions
Unless I've forgotten about something Perez did, there's a major difference between Silva and Perez that accounts for our dislike/hate.
Both were signed for way too much money when it wasn’t warranted due to bad GMs. Perez wasn’t good, got even worse, and didn’t live up to his contract. Silva wasn’t good, got worse, was a total prick in the clubhouse, stirred up shit with his coaches, never took responsibility for his own failures, and as a bonus was really brusque with the press.
Wasn't good, got worse, and was paid plenty, check.
A total prick in the clubhouse? Stories floated around that he made some guys kinda angry when he refused to go down to the Minors to work on his pitching, and clogged up a spot in the pen as a result. Stirred up shit? Can’t say I know if he did. Never took responsibility for his own failures? Check. Was brusque with the press? Can’t say I know, though I do know Perez knows very little English, so he never really a “go-to” guy for the newspapers/TVs.
Silva definitley pissed you guys off for good reason, no doubt. I’m just hoping that, since Perez is so reviled and hated, our levels of vitrol can match your levels of vitrol in the coming years, when more time has passed.
"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.
AA Gamethread Embiggening Record Holder- 453 posts (10/03/10)
3rd Place- 2011 AAOP Contest
by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Mar 29, 2011 10:35 PM PDT up reply actions
I don't even know why you want to hate someone.
Oliver Perez was bad, OK I get it, get over it? Should probably blame the GM who signed him instead.
by Patrick Stites on Mar 30, 2011 2:16 AM PDT up reply actions
I can't stand Carlos Silva.
It’s amazing that there is a baseball player that has annoyed me this much but there you go. His ending with the Cubs couldn’t be more fitting.
I practically saw his demise coming a mile away, although it came much quicker than I expected. He pitched pretty well during the early going for the Cubs but while doing so there was something else at work. His run-support towered over the rest of the Cubs pitching staff during that stretch. Everything was going unrealistically well for Silva. Then he started losing. The happiness he was enjoying was fading. I think he got ejected in the 1st inning in his second to last start in August when he lost his temper after some runs scored. His season ended with health issues of course.
I was pretty much ready to accept that we might be cutting Bradley before the Cubs wind up cutting Silva. It didn’t matter to me. I would do that trade over in a heartbeat as it was.
Enter vintage Carlos Silva…
First Spring Training game, pitched like crap, fought with a teammate, and left the the area on a cart without comment. Are you kidding me? Almost right out of the Eric Byrnes playbook.
Then Silva just kept sucking. Cubs media tried to drum up trade interest by noting that scouts were watching him causing some people to think he was actually tradable.
Then the Cubs finally cut him. And it doesn’t even end there. Silva basically takes a dump on the organization on the way out while the Cubs ruthlessly return fire. Perfect!
For all the “warnings” we got from other fanbases regarding what to expect from Milton Bradley, I present to you….
Carlos Silva…..exactly as advertised.
by ThundaPC on Mar 29, 2011 8:35 PM PDT reply actions 9 recs
One of the funnier things is that Silva did indeed get better when he left!
by Jeff Sullivan on Mar 29, 2011 8:37 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I'm just so happy this guy is not on our team anymore
About all that needs to be said. Was he this big a dillrod when he was a Mariner, and I just don’t remember? I hated him just fine because he was an awful pitcher.
Yes he was this bad as a Mariner.
He even threatened to throw Ichiro against a clubhouse wall. Fuck that cockwallet.
I've said it once, but it bears repeating.
I hope Carlos Silva falls dick first into a rock tumbler.
Dawg! He put da team on his back!
by JAH on Mar 29, 2011 9:37 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I have a question
The ability to find occasional delight in being bitter is programmed into our genes
This does seem to be true; there is a special enjoyment in witnessing the misfortunes of others (especially when they seem justly deserved). So why is it that only the Germans actually coined a word for it? Or is there a similar word in some other languages, and we’ve just adopted the German one because, hey Germans.
I hope Bill Bavasi is feeling the opposite of the what we're feeling today.
Shame is the closest thing I can think of….shame in giving that fat tub of lard such a big contract. I would really enjoy it if Bavasi expressed sincere shame and sorrow at what he did to this franchise.
It's just comeuppance, and it is delicious...
Kharma slapping him in the fat, fat, face.
It’s the things he did here, and the way he left here that really stired my ire. You had a gaggle of players, a clique if you will, that sat around joking, gaining weight, and sucking.. and he seemed to be the ring leader (or mouth). And rather than take blame for their own suckitude, he blamed the one guy on the team that seemed to actually give a damn, stay in shape, and play every game as if it mattered – Ichiro. Because, apparently, it’s the guy that’s trying that’s actually holding the team back.
Fuck him. His tears are delicious and bring me sweet dreams at night.
This is just the opposite side of the Hamilton, Wilhelmsen, or Lueke story/coin. Someone who screwed up, learned from it, and is trying to be better. I love those stories, and root for those guys.
by Kunkoh on Mar 30, 2011 2:20 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Bill Bavasi
The gift that just keeps on giving. At least this meltdown is on somebody else. If we get a decent 4 months out of Bradley, we win the trade :D
by New England Fan on Mar 30, 2011 2:35 AM PDT reply actions
Did I miss something with the Carlos Gomez photo?
Oh wait, they are both Carloses. I really like how Gomez is covering Counsell’s rock with paper, thereby winning the handshake.
There have been overpaid assholes in baseball before
I’m not sure there has been such a potent combination of overpaid and asshole before, though. At least not for the Mariners.
It just occurred to me that the Cubs still have Zambrano
They really cornered the market on Venezuelan shitheads named Carlos
by Bearskin Rugburn on Mar 30, 2011 6:35 AM PDT reply actions
Cubs fans have had their head buried in the sand since day one of this trade.
So many seemed to assume the Mariners and their fans were the only ones in baseball unaware of the risks in taking on Milton Bradley (I mean, the Mariners do play all the way up in the Northwest cut off from all outside information). None seemed to notice how shitty Silva had been over the past few years. The first few months of last year produced a willful ignorance among the fan base ignoring the few voices of reason. Now I can get a chuckle reading Cubs fans bitch online about how Silva turned out to be a piece of shit player, terrible teammate and a guy unwilling to take any responsibility for his failings. Who knew!
No matter where you go, there you are.
Whats scary is Silva may end up being the more valuable player in the end
Milton’s got to hit quite well to outdo him. But this isnt about value so much as who is the more malignant.
by Bearskin Rugburn on Mar 30, 2011 7:27 AM PDT up reply actions
I totally agree.
Even if Bradley self destructs by 1 May and is done with the Mariners, no one here will be shocked. On the other hand, the willful ignorance of Cubs fans from the start towards Silva as a player, person and teammate makes this enjoyable.
No matter where you go, there you are.
Going by straight value, according to Fangraphs Bradley has to be worth 2.2 WAR to even the trade out.
He exceeded that threshold every year between 2003-2008. Even in 2009, he was worth 1.1 WAR on the Cubs despite all the flak that year.
If he stays healthy, it’s very possible he hits the 2.2 WAR mark… though we absolutely can’t expect anything after last year’s debacle.
I am going to come into your house at night and rec up the place.
This is the kicker.
Mariner fans still only hate one of the two players in the deal. Cubs fans now hate BOTH players.
by ThundaPC on Mar 30, 2011 9:58 AM PDT up reply actions 5 recs
Great quote from that article-- from GM Jim Hendry.
“Obviously we’re dealing with a man at this stage of his career who’s not willing to face the facts,” Hendry said. "What he’s done for the last few years in his career, except for a two-month period, is way below major league standards. And he seems to have the continual problem (of) blaming everybody but himself.
“Basically, he wasn’t good enough to make the team. You factor in not only spring training, but you try to go back and factor in the second half of last year, looking at a guy who had a 14-something ERA from July 11 and came to camp with a notion that he already had a spot in the rotation. Obviously, the first three, four outings, quite poor.”
“His comments about Mark Riggins were totally inappropriate and unacceptable. Once again, it’s a weakness for somebody that doesn’t perform well and chooses to blame somebody else on the way out.”
What if we simply took the highest ceiling players, who fit ANY system, and worked out the details later? If we do go that route, there’s no way you can convince me Ponder is a good choice in the 1st round.
by Tyler Jorgensen on Mar 30, 2011 11:59 AM PDT up reply actions
Is he talking about Ian Snell?
…oh. No, he’s not.
I am going to come into your house at night and rec up the place.
This feels so good
I remember last year some arrogant Cubs writer gloating his douchebag ass off on KIRO about Silva’s early success and Bradley’s issues in Seattle. Since I didn’t have the capability of tracking him down and kicking him in the jimmy, all I could do was sit back and hope that Silva would collapse. Thanks Carlos, for making that guy look like a jackass.
I've made a huge mistake.
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