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Around SBN: Trent Richardson Interviews Fellow Brown Brandon Weeden

6/1: Open Game Thread, Part 2

Speed up.

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Did we get 'em?

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 9:09 PM PDT reply actions  

That royals 1B was one possibility.

I was waiting for someone to say Adrian Gonzalez so we could figure out if the Padres are rebuilding or not.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 9:12 PM PDT up reply actions  

Also it was a Ben Broussard joke.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 9:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

Seemed to have whooshed on by everyone.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 9:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

Three swinging strikeouts, it seems there was a sort of trend that inning, I'll figure it out in a minute.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:12 PM PDT reply actions  

Sean White came in for relief for Felix in very early 2007 when Felix got injured

I rolled into that game and arrived roughly 3 pitches before Felix got hurt. This will forever be my first thought when I see Sean White and the sinking feeling of sadness will be the feeling I feel whenever he comes in.

Fuck you, Sean White

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:12 PM PDT reply actions  

and looking at BBRef, it was Jake Woods that actually came in, not White

That indicates how much I hate Sean White that I strongly associate him with that negative memory

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

Don't even go there.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

So, we're going to give up nine home runs now?

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 9:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

NOT SEAN WHITE, PLEASE NO

Rob Johnson invented AIDS

by I Lick Squirrels on Jun 1, 2010 9:13 PM PDT reply actions  

Quick vote,

who do you like more, Jason Vargas or Doug Fister?

by Slow Country on Jun 1, 2010 9:14 PM PDT reply actions  

Figlet.

...and now I'm here

by CapSea on Jun 1, 2010 9:14 PM PDT up reply actions   2 recs

Fister

I’m still a novice at sabermetrics and all the analytical stuff, but it just seems like he’s got a more sustainable package to me.

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Fister

Karma police, arrest this man.

by wyte_lightning on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Fister.

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Fister

His name makes me giggle.

by Rachmaninoff on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Tie

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

It's a wash, Doug's name is the tiebreaker.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Much better to put a pin sized hole in the top of them so the brake fluid doesn't all leak out at once

No point in destroying the brake lines so he’ll instantly realize it when he backs out of his driveway at 4 MPH, causing no damage.

Better to have him realize it when he’s going 60 down a mountain road

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:19 PM PDT up reply actions  

SR 129

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

But SR 129 is more scenic in my opinion

No giant mountain to look at but the rest of the scenery is awesome

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

I got this one covered, Corco.

Highway 1. When he crashes into the ocean, there will be little evidence left of what went wrong.

by katal on Jun 1, 2010 9:21 PM PDT up reply actions  

You are a scary person.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:22 PM PDT up reply actions  

RRS :(

Hard work never killed nobody, but I won't take my chances.

by JAH on Jun 1, 2010 9:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

Ogopogo.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 11:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

I've got to vote for the lesbian mafia don.

Sorry Doug, I actually like you better, but the other guy gets my vote here.

by TrustBaseball on Jun 1, 2010 11:08 PM PDT up reply actions  

Greasy lesbian mafia don from New Jersey who might also be amphibious.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 11:26 PM PDT up reply actions  

Wait, isn't he also a vampire?

Shit.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 11:37 PM PDT up reply actions  

The Twins feel our pain

And are trying to get out as quickly with as few pitches as possible for Vargas so that he stays in.

by seiferguy on Jun 1, 2010 9:14 PM PDT reply actions  

Keep your fingers crossed

I can’t take it anymore. Every single game I feel like we’re gonna lose in the 8th or 9th inning.

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:15 PM PDT reply actions  

I'm having a great evening so far, but by God if Sean White ruins it I'm going to stab things.

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:16 PM PDT reply actions  

Better sharpen that knife.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

Eliezer Alfonso

Better than Rob Johnson.

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:17 PM PDT reply actions  

It's actually Alfonzo.

But yeah, I’m kind of a big fan of him too.

by seiferguy on Jun 1, 2010 9:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

You're new here.

So, just a heads up: we do not talk about fantasy baseball here. No one cares. Really.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:23 PM PDT up reply actions  

Quick start guide!

This off-topic thread was very helpful to me. I’ve only been here a few months, but it’s a pretty easy to follow style guide and rules of the road. Read the fanpost itself, and scroll down a bit to read a comment that was rec’d into green-ness. Both are helpful.

Neither mention fantasy baseball, but they probably should. Because it’s a generally acknowledged fact of the site. I’m new; you’re new. But it’s a great site, good community. Welcome.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:28 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Who did you bench in favor of him?

And what round did you draft him in, anyway? I want every detail about this team of yours.

by katal on Jun 1, 2010 9:23 PM PDT up reply actions  

You guys have Joe Freaking Mauer, we deserve one per series.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:24 PM PDT up reply actions  

We could probably take em off your hands if you want.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

*On your mantle.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:33 PM PDT up reply actions  

In other news, who the hell has a mantle anymore?

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:33 PM PDT up reply actions  

To wikipedia!

Great, now I won’t get anything done.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:43 PM PDT up reply actions  

Oh I love it when he plays well.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:23 PM PDT reply actions  

Chrome is the best thing to come out of the internets.

Well… porn, so second.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:30 PM PDT up reply actions  

I detest Google.

But I can’t walk away from their web browser until Firefox fixes all its memory leak problems.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

Corrected:

Remember Windows ME?
  
(I’m an IT Manager)

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions  

Meh.

Windows 2000, XP, and 7 have been very stable operating systems and have served both my work and home environments well.

by BrianL on Jun 1, 2010 9:38 PM PDT up reply actions  

Oh sure, get all serious on me

Decent versions: XP SP2, Win Server 2003 and later, and MAYBE Win7 (I’m reserving judgement until its been out a little longer).
  
Also, OS X 10.5.6 and above; in some environments (home and a few specific business cases).

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:40 PM PDT up reply actions  

I have no respect for OS X.

Slapping a user interface shell on BSD Unix is not building your own operating system.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:41 PM PDT up reply actions  

Uh...

A BSD-compatible layer =! BSD. I know people who contribute to BSD and they’d throw that one back into your teeth. BSD doesn’t have a Mach microkernel. OS X does.

Also, you might go look up Mach and where the grad student who helped develop it ended up working.

by eponymous_coward on Jun 1, 2010 9:44 PM PDT up reply actions  

If you're running Windows, open up an instance of Firefox.

Perpetuate it with a few different tabs. Now hit Ctrl+Alt+Del and view the processes tab in your task manager. Under the memory column, watch the Firefox usage tick up and up and up and up and up in an unstoppable fashion. Bad coding does this.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions  

Not sure if the problem occurs on Firefox for Mac.

But that just makes me ask why you bother running Firefox. Safari is programmed natively for Mac OS X, and both are running the WebKit rendering engine.

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:38 PM PDT up reply actions  

hahahahahahahahaha

It’s called “Activity Monitor” on your Mac

by eponymous_coward on Jun 1, 2010 9:39 PM PDT up reply actions  

TAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEE

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:25 PM PDT reply actions  

Well that was horseshit.

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:27 PM PDT reply actions  

Ball 5!

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:28 PM PDT reply actions  

Man, the Twins suck.

What're ya gonna do with those pies, boys?

by rickpo on Jun 1, 2010 9:29 PM PDT reply actions  

Saunders

He needs a hit. That way all 9 can have at least a hit.

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:30 PM PDT reply actions  

Apparently if you swing the bat...

You might get basehits? Perhaps this has been Casey and Chone’s problems all season.

by seiferguy on Jun 1, 2010 9:31 PM PDT reply actions  

Ron Maday

He needed a workout. I mean to get worked out.

by Zack Carlson on Jun 1, 2010 9:32 PM PDT up reply actions  

Haha, well, you get what I mean.

Figgy has had a pretty high strikeout ratio. He’s been taking too many pitches. I love walks and all, but there needs to be a happy balance.

by seiferguy on Jun 1, 2010 9:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

This game is boring

who wants to go see sex and the city?

by Slow Country on Jun 1, 2010 9:35 PM PDT reply actions  

I'm in, what theatre?

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions  

That movie was way too terrible to make as much money as it did.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:41 PM PDT up reply actions  

It was really just, meh.

Exactly like whoever plays Alice, plain and boring.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:46 PM PDT up reply actions  

.

Hard work never killed nobody, but I won't take my chances.

by JAH on Jun 1, 2010 9:36 PM PDT reply actions  

Oh hey!

The Twins #3 and #4 hitters are pun-opposites!

...and now I'm here

by CapSea on Jun 1, 2010 9:37 PM PDT reply actions  

Hey Wak!

Look, Kelley just schooled their two best hitters.

by Maury Povich on Jun 1, 2010 9:38 PM PDT reply actions  

Wak's Reply:

Hey, I believe in White more!

by IlliniM on Jun 1, 2010 9:39 PM PDT up reply actions  

"Morneau stays behind everything"

as the replay shows him getting way out in front.

Yes, we have a coupon.

by Crystal for DH on Jun 1, 2010 9:38 PM PDT reply actions  

I like this Alfonzo guy

Better than Rob Johnson. Also, Eliezer sounds cool.

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:43 PM PDT reply actions  

Dangit

No hits for Saunders. I really really want him to be good.

by seiferguy on Jun 1, 2010 9:45 PM PDT reply actions  

Get a hit Michael. A single would be fine. Stop missing

and striking out twice on 6 pitches.

I too really want you to be good.

ignacio

by ignacio on Jun 1, 2010 9:45 PM PDT reply actions  

Good point.

I forgot how good this team was once.

by FairWeatherFred on Jun 1, 2010 9:47 PM PDT up reply actions  

I have a hard time remembering the starting pitchers.

Freddy Garcia, Jamie Moyer, Gil Meche, then?

ignacio

by ignacio on Jun 1, 2010 9:50 PM PDT up reply actions  

Paul Abbott had 18 wins!

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:50 PM PDT up reply actions  

We had this weird deal called an offense too.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:51 PM PDT up reply actions  

Pshaw, only in terms of wins...

who cares about those when we have other fancier stats?

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

They tied the 1843 Cubs or something who had like 4 ties.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

Well I got the millenium.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

And didn't even make it to the GODDAMN WORLD SERIES.

FUCK YOU YANKEES.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:54 PM PDT up reply actions  

True

But still…I will never get over it

by bomdal on Jun 1, 2010 9:57 PM PDT up reply actions  

Not only did they not win it....Oh never fucking mind.

We won this goddamn game.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:02 PM PDT up reply actions  

Game A?

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:05 PM PDT up reply actions  

Um, why?

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:06 PM PDT up reply actions  

If I recall correctly

Olerud lined out to first with the winning run aboard.

by Matt Erickson on Jun 1, 2010 10:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Touche

You are correct. Can’t figure out which game I’m thinking of…

by Matt Erickson on Jun 1, 2010 10:29 PM PDT up reply actions  

117 really is a lot more than 116.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

Holy shit.

You’re right.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:08 PM PDT up reply actions  

We're through the looking glass now, people.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 10:12 PM PDT up reply actions  

A sweep would have been. That shit we could have won.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:59 PM PDT up reply actions  

95 got me interested in baseball

2001 is when I fell in love with it.

But I’m a weird kid from Spokane who couldn’t see games on TV until we got cable in ’01.

by Grady Clapp on Jun 1, 2010 9:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

I remember Sasaki

And how he didn’t lose games in the 9th inning.

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

I've heard about this shit. Might have to look it up on snopes.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:54 PM PDT up reply actions  

I really liked Kaz too

but there’s no way anyone gets past Randy and Felix

by Matthew on Jun 1, 2010 9:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

Randy left too early

Kaz replaced Jose Mesa and was not Jose Mesa for 4 years. And was a cheating drunk!

by Robert on Jun 1, 2010 9:59 PM PDT up reply actions  

Ayala was my first hated player. Mesa was my second.

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 10:01 PM PDT up reply actions  

Jeff Schaefer

then Rich “E-4” Amaral

by Matthew on Jun 1, 2010 10:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

Who's the first?

Are you talking about relief/closers or pitchers overall?

by level on Jun 1, 2010 9:56 PM PDT up reply actions  

When's Langerhans gonna play?

Not that i miss him for Saunders, but just curious.

by IlliniM on Jun 1, 2010 9:47 PM PDT reply actions  

I never understood the Langerhans love...

Isn’t he just another backup player in a long line of serviceable replacement guys?

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:48 PM PDT up reply actions  

I was at the game where he hit a walk-off dinger off the Rays

so I will always have an irrational liking for him.

Yes, we have a coupon.

by Crystal for DH on Jun 1, 2010 9:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

0.00 ERA. And he's sustained it for the entire start of this season.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

Ruh roh

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:52 PM PDT reply actions  

Everybody clap your hands!

clapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclapclap
  
(As my girlfriend claps and looks around the stadium laughing and wondering “why? why do we allllll do this?”

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:59 PM PDT up reply actions  

That felt dirty. Like it wasn't really the mariners.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 9:57 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

WIN!

Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?

by Benne on Jun 1, 2010 9:57 PM PDT reply actions  

Wut

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by Corco on Jun 1, 2010 9:57 PM PDT reply actions  

Love the specialty high-fives...

Did you catch Alfonzo’s “Claw” five?

by NWade on Jun 1, 2010 9:57 PM PDT reply actions  

No!

I must will myself back to the Tropic of Cairo!

by harkening on Jun 1, 2010 9:58 PM PDT reply actions  

WINNING IS BETTER THAN LOSING!

YAY!

"Good evening Blazer fans, wherever you may be!"-Bill Schonely

by skywaker9 on Jun 1, 2010 9:58 PM PDT reply actions  

Lopez didn't even say words!

He’s speaking in tongues because he’s divine!

38!

by joof on Jun 1, 2010 9:59 PM PDT reply actions  

Offensive ex-plosion!

Yay.

"Good evening Blazer fans, wherever you may be!"-Bill Schonely

by skywaker9 on Jun 1, 2010 9:59 PM PDT reply actions  

Less than Clint Nageotte

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 10:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

At least you still remember it!

Future generations will be baffled by our Clint Nageotte stories.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 10:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

Or Kaz.

Whose hat was literally drenched before he even came into the game.

by Coach Owens on Jun 1, 2010 10:05 PM PDT up reply actions  

I vaguely remember a Padres pitcher (can't recall his name)...

About 10ish years ago that was the same way.
Can Jeff or someone with a better memory help me out?

Karma police, arrest this man.

by wyte_lightning on Jun 1, 2010 10:07 PM PDT up reply actions  

YES I REMEMBER NOW

Andy Ashby!! His face would be pouring sweat by the end of his warmup pitches.

Karma police, arrest this man.

by wyte_lightning on Jun 1, 2010 10:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

I got my picture taken with him when I was a kid

I hugged him. He asked why I was wearing a Seahawks sweatshirt to a Padres game.

by Jeff Sullivan on Jun 1, 2010 10:25 PM PDT up reply actions   2 recs

No, Lopez

you do not try to hit it in the other way.

by IlliniM on Jun 1, 2010 10:00 PM PDT reply actions  

PLAYOFFS!

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors

by JY on Jun 1, 2010 10:00 PM PDT reply actions  

You don't know that.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:03 PM PDT up reply actions  

Plus he's dead. Like Nick Adenhart dead.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

by the other side on Jun 1, 2010 10:03 PM PDT up reply actions  

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