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Around SBN: Jerry Sandusky's Wife Tries To Run A Reporter Over

Nutshots & Studying Pain Tolerance

In the ninth inning last night, Rob Johnson took a foul tip off the junk. It wasn't funny, because it was a foul tip off the junk, but it was funny, because people getting hit in the junk is funny, because the reactions tend to be pricelessly disproportionate to the severity of the damage. Bonus funny points were granted on account of it being Rob Johnson on the receiving end.

What was interesting about Johnson, though, was the speed with which he collapsed forward in a heap, and the amount of time he spent positioned in said heap on the ground. Not that any man who's ever been hit in the junk would ever condemn another man for not taking it well when he gets hit in the junk, but if you thought Johnson's response and recovery were drawn out and unusually excessive, you weren't alone. It seemed like a long delay, and longer than we've seen in the past.

So I went to the video and made use of the stopwatch on my phone that I just discovered by accident last night. Serendipity! Here's the relevant data for Rob Johnson's nutshot:

Pitch 93mph fastball
Result Foul tip
Time to ground 3s
Time to kneel 80s
Time to stand 110s
Time to warmup 150s
Time to next pitch 190s

The most important thing, of course, is the time to next pitch. That's the best measure of how well a guy takes a foul tip off the junk. All the stuff in between only adds color. More than three minutes passed between the pitch that hit Rob Johnson in the junk and the next pitch that did not hit Rob Johnson in the junk.

But then, what is data without a point of comparison? And that's where LL comes in handy. The activity in the game threads can frequently be overwhelming, but the advantage of having so many comments is that everything that happens on the field gets archived online, so by using the search bar we're able to track down the timing of prior events with ease. It was in this way that I was able to pull up a relevant Kenji Johjima nutshot from 2008. Results?

Pitch 88mph fastball
Result Foul tip
Time to ground N/A
Time to kneel 2s
Time to stand 60s
Time to warmup N/A
Time to next pitch 92s

Roy Corcoran got Kenji good, but Kenji took it a hell of a lot better than Johnson did. He never went to the ground, and he didn't need a warmup pitch. He just knelt, caught his breath, and recovered in half the time.

Worried that this might've been an anomaly, I pulled up another relevant Kenji nutshot from 2006. The camera work on this one wasn't as good, so I couldn't measure the transition stages, but Kenji took a Javy Lopez foul tip on a JJ Putz 88mph splitter off the junk, knelt, and prepared to catch the next pitch just 72 seconds later. 72 seconds. That's 20 seconds faster than the first Kenji clip I pulled up, and an unthinkable 118 seconds faster than Rob Johnson last night.

Following are what Rob Johnson and Kenji looked like after 72 seconds, respectively:

Johnsonjoh_medium

And lest you think that Kenji is just some sort of unfeeling iron man, remember that Adrian Beltre took one of the most famous baseballs off the junk in Seattle history last August when he was playing the field. The baseball tore one of Adrian Beltre's testicles. Time to next pitch: 68 seconds, with much of the delay caused by a changing of the batters. Beltre winced, but never fell to the ground. He didn't even kneel or rest his hands on his knees for more than a moment.

Last night, Rob Johnson took a foul tip off the junk. You never want to criticize the way a man responds to a foul tip off the junk, because it really hurts, but, really? More than three minutes? You're a catcher, Rob. You're a catcher in the Major Leagues. It's time to start acting like you've been there before.

Comment 77 comments  |  15 recs  | 

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Maybe the 5 mph difference in fastball speed is significant?

Just playing devil’s advocate, but both of Kenji’s hits came on 88 mph pitches.

It seems the reaction from batters is quite different when they get buzzed with a 98 mph fastball, as opposed to a 93 mph one or 88 mph one… maybe the increase in speed increases the pain exponentially.

Or maybe, Rob Johnson is just a wuss in ADDITION to being terrible at baseball.

by HititHere on May 19, 2010 4:01 PM PDT reply actions  

I'm not a professional athlete

but I’d be amazed if a 98 mph fastball to the junk hurt more than a 93 mph fastball to the junk. After a point, it’s just miserably painful no matter what.

by pdb on May 19, 2010 4:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

I thought about that, but decided it wasn't worth addressing

Balls are delicate. They can get hurt by walking in jeans. There’s probably a difference between getting hit by a baseball at 5mph and a baseball at 10mph, but once you get beyond, I dunno, 12, it’s all just a baseball to the junk. I can’t even imagine.

by Jeff Sullivan on May 19, 2010 4:07 PM PDT up reply actions   5 recs

I applaud the calculation

I’m puzzled by the comma.

On the main point, you have me convinced that it would hurt at least a little more.

by Torjazz on May 19, 2010 4:38 PM PDT up reply actions  

So how many kilos of force does a 100mph fastball deliver, then?

It says on a few sites I’ve read that 50kg is enough to crush/rupture the testicle, and obviously Adrian experienced that level of damage last year, so a baseball is capable of delivering that type of force.

There is no such thing as innocence, only degrees of guilt.

by misterjonez on May 19, 2010 9:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

Also, let's not go so far as to say that Rob Johnson is a wuss

He stayed in the game. He stayed in the game after that foul tip off the finger, too.

He just takes his time like a pretty princess.

by Jeff Sullivan on May 19, 2010 4:12 PM PDT up reply actions   2 recs

Besides, it can't be completely objective

Without X-ray vision and slo-mo (and who would want that anyway, ick) it’s entirely possible Kenji took a glancing blow to the junk, while Johnson took a direct hit.

by HititHere on May 19, 2010 4:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

I would be willing to bet

that a large part of that 190 seconds was spent trying not to vomit copiously all over the home plate area.

by pdb on May 19, 2010 4:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

Well, I researched for about 30 minutes and didn't find anything conclusive

on google.

I would guess it has to do with the nerve pathway from the testicles (The pudendal nerve enervates the entire crotch, including the testicles), and the ‘overload’ mechanism present in the spinal cord for dealing with overly traumatic inputs, such as a swift junk-shot.

Basically, when the spinal cord gets overloaded then it becomes a de facto brain and sort of processes the data by itself, issuing responses as it sees fit. Usually, the responses aren’t all that productive (like when a paraplegic’s heart rate and blood pressure absolutely skyrocket due to a wrinkle in their bedsheets, known as autonomic dysreflexia).

Not knowing for sure why the testicle trauma = nausea/vomiting, I would guess it has to do with this type of broken feedback mechanism in the spinal cord.

There is no such thing as innocence, only degrees of guilt.

by misterjonez on May 19, 2010 9:17 PM PDT up reply actions  

Speculating without personal experience

but could the edge of the cup been driven into something? And would that be quantifiably more painful?

by msb on May 19, 2010 4:04 PM PDT reply actions  

Had a friend in HS who this pretty much happened to

Took a pitch off his cup and I think what happened was his testicle got pinched between the cup and his leg. Was pretty bad… had to go to the hospital and everything…

But yeah, that’s probably not how they’re supposed to be worn

by Zack on May 19, 2010 4:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

Didn't this happen to Michael Barrett a c(o)uple of years ago?

I can't resist clicking "Rec" when I see a post with four [of them] already.

by thehemogoblin on May 19, 2010 4:17 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

I get it.

The parentheses. Took me a second though. Well done.

by Matt Erickson on May 19, 2010 4:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

I don't know anything about how Rob Johnson wears his cup

I know a lot about how you’re supposed to wear a cup, and, being a catcher, Johnson presumably isn’t in the business of putting himself in needless extra danger.

by Jeff Sullivan on May 19, 2010 4:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'm inclined to agree with your assessment,

but then again, I’ve seen Rob Johnson lack the skills that are generally assumed of a major league catcher many a time.

by FlaskInSafeco on May 19, 2010 4:54 PM PDT up reply actions  

Hahah was this really necessary

I mean does taking a nut shot in stride make you a better catcher? I think we should focus more on the lack of skill or depth in our catching position.

I kind of hope this year goes terrible so we could get some good prospects for Lee and Lopez..

I wonder what type of players we could get if we clean house.

by LeftArrow2 on May 19, 2010 4:08 PM PDT reply actions  

If you found it unnecessary

perhaps you should have stopped reading it, moved on to something you found more interesting, and not said anything?

by pdb on May 19, 2010 4:11 PM PDT up reply actions  

You need to take into account crowd size.

Does time to next pitch have to do with how many people are watching in person?

by JonBBT on May 19, 2010 4:18 PM PDT reply actions  

Are we sure Rob Johnson was even wearing a cup?

That could make a difference. You’d think a professional catcher would have heard of the occasional “cup check.”

by Inkara1 on May 19, 2010 4:20 PM PDT reply actions  

Of course he was wearing a cup. He would have been down for a lot longer than 3 minutes without a cup.

Speaking as a former hockey goalie, getting pegged in the nuts while you’re wearing a cup still hurts, but not for that long. Your business gets jostled, then you get a little nauseous, and then you’re fine.

Maybe Kenji has an immunity to getting nauseous.

Milton Bradley apologist

by sanford_and_son on May 19, 2010 4:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

I haven't worn a cup for about 5 years now

but unless technology has changed, or I was wearing them like an idiot, there is potential for one or potentially 2 nuts to be exposed at the very bottom of the cup in a squatting position like being at catcher. The hanging of the nuts combined with the pushing up of the cup that results from a squatting position can lead to a slightly or fully exposed nut.

by Zwakamatsu on May 19, 2010 4:37 PM PDT up reply actions  

So rec'd.

Just make sure you change the date to May 19, 2010 when you actually mail this to the Mariners (which you’d damned well better do).

by Decatur on May 19, 2010 6:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

That whole paragraph

is the one that takes it home.

There is no such thing as innocence, only degrees of guilt.

by misterjonez on May 19, 2010 9:23 PM PDT up reply actions  

I think the actual reason behind why Rob Johnson sucks at catching the ball

is because he’s afraid of it.

I think he’s a pussy (for lack of a better word) compared to guys like Kenji, Beltre, or most professional ballplayers, and therefore is too scared of the ball hurting him.

He sometimes instinctively flinches away from the ball, just has his hand out there, with his face almost averted (almost like his eyes are closed with fear), and let’s the ball get by. It happens too many goddamm fucking times.

by Sam Regens on May 19, 2010 6:24 PM PDT reply actions  

And I say "pussy" compared to guys like Kenji, Beltre, or most professional ballplayers,

and not compared to the average guy off the street. A ballplayer is a ballplayer no matter how much he sucks compared to his contemporaries.

(But they do ge better paid than the average guy off the street also).

by Sam Regens on May 19, 2010 6:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

Speaking of pussy...

I wish we had some way of comparing pain thresholds between getting hit in the balls and getting hit in the vagina. Possibly Johnson reacted differently to getting hit down there because he has something different down there than these other guys? I would imagine the pain of getting hit in the testicles would outweigh that of getting hit in the vagina, but who knows? With the proper angle, that could do some serious damage…

Is this too far? I know we all hate Rob Johnson, but I feel a little bad for saying he has woman parts. Maybe I just feel like I’m insulting women.

by nemo1 on May 19, 2010 9:08 PM PDT reply actions  

Are you making a case for female catchers?

If so, I’m intrigued.

There is no such thing as innocence, only degrees of guilt.

by misterjonez on May 19, 2010 9:24 PM PDT up reply actions  

You are bad.

Girl parts jokes are so dead meme’d and unoriginal.

by Eyebrows on May 20, 2010 10:53 AM PDT via mobile up reply actions  

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