Mariners Sign One Cool Customer
by Jeff Sullivan on Dec 8, 2010 4:44 PM PST
in Seattle Mariners Transactions
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PrintM's Hire Custodian To Clean Offensive Mess
Jack Given Custody Of DH Slot
Customization Of New Lineup Begins With Left-Handed Bat
Mariners Tab Customary Slugger To Solve Offensive Woes
New DH Ac-Customed To Driving In Runs
Masher Dis-Cust As M's Make Move
Stuffed Cust: Mariners Inject Different Flavor Into Middle Of Lineup
With Addition, M's Aim To Establish Interla-Custrine Kingdom
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Frustrated Mariners Fans Learn to Cust?
De Gutibus non disputandum est
by Bearskin Rugburn on Dec 8, 2010 4:46 PM PST reply actions
Pretty quick thinking on Jeff's part
Hit print screen Cust in time.
by Eyeball Kid on Dec 8, 2010 6:18 PM PST via mobile up reply actions 2 recs
Jack Z, amid job security tensions, signs left handed bat in what is considered Cust-ers last stand
by tsunamijesus on Dec 8, 2010 4:49 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
Made that one earlier.
Mute the Sounders. Malamute the Huskies.
by thehemogoblin on Dec 8, 2010 5:21 PM PST up reply actions
This is going to be the worst comments thread ever.
by Teej on Dec 8, 2010 4:51 PM PST reply actions 13 recs
These are terrible. Please stop the punishment.
But I really love that you sat down to really hash out the possibilities. Do puns have a long history in baseball headlines, or is this a recent Cust-om?
Mariners Hoping to Grow Ac-Customed to Offense
Proud Adoptive Parent of no one, cause my son left me.
I still think Obi-wan wanted them to hook up & raise some genetic freaks with midichlorians firing out of their ass. - ResDog
THE GIANTS WON THE WORLD SERIES
He keeps breaking.
Clowns became fair game earlier in the year.
"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors
by JY on Dec 8, 2010 5:01 PM PST up reply actions
Sounds like they might have a custic relationship.
Griffey!
by Big Jared on Dec 8, 2010 8:38 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I hope he avoids getting a concustion.
I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul - Invictus
This will go on a while.
You should probably step away from the computer.
Maybe get some frozen custard?
We all knew it take more than some Cust-omizing
by juridec on Dec 8, 2010 5:09 PM PST up reply actions 2 recs
Way to take it in a different direction
I like the way you think
Mariners/D Broncos/BSU Broncos fan in Seattle
The first rule of Lookout Landing is...
Looking for more Jacks; M's sign Cust.
I fucking hate you Mariners
On another note, we should do a puns thread.
by Kenneth Arthur on Dec 8, 2010 5:08 PM PST up reply actions 8 recs
I'm hoping Jeff plans on banning everyone posting puns here.
"That's fuckin' ingenious, if I understand it correctly. It's a Swiss fuckin' watch. "
by the other side on Dec 8, 2010 5:23 PM PST up reply actions
Masturbation jokes are like an instant rec from me
Mariners/D Broncos/BSU Broncos fan in Seattle
The first rule of Lookout Landing is...
We're losing the off season too?
"That's fuckin' ingenious, if I understand it correctly. It's a Swiss fuckin' watch. "
by the other side on Dec 8, 2010 5:19 PM PST up reply actions
M's Fit Slugger into Pro-Cust-ean Payroll;
May Need Additional Cuts (Cust?) to Add More
"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett Mariners Minors
So far the search has turned up nothing but Custaceans.
by Eyeball Kid on Dec 8, 2010 6:11 PM PST via mobile up reply actions 2 recs
Not Making Custer
Mariners release enigmatic veteran
Milton Bradley deemed unCustworthy
Mariners bring in new DH.
by Eyeball Kid on Dec 8, 2010 6:14 PM PST via mobile reply actions
Having tried the 'annoy the team into submission' strategy
and deemed it a huge failure in 2010, the Mariners abandon their lo-Cust strategy to fit into the Cust-omary AL team format by signing a DH with an affinity for walks and wallops!
TWOFER!
Your 2-3-4 hitters:
Dust, Just, and Cust
by FairWeatherFred on Dec 8, 2010 6:20 PM PST reply actions 8 recs
New idea for M's offseason commercials.
Cooking class! Today’s Topic: Custard!
M's fan in PA, soon to be LA
Rob Johnson proves you can't make an omelette without cracking a few eggs
on the floor of your kitchen because they get all slippery once the first one you break gets all over your hands and you tried to get another but now there’s shell in the bowl and damnit another one on the ground and whoopsy your toddler just slipped in the puddle of broken eggs and his head made a resounding thud against the linoleum.
by abender20 on Dec 8, 2010 6:53 PM PST up reply actions 9 recs
What will Ackley be Dustin off today?
M's fan in PA, soon to be LA
by perfectstrat on Dec 8, 2010 7:03 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
"Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack"
Shoot me now. No really. Do it.
M's fan in PA, soon to be LA
Before I leave I puke up tequila and glitter
Seems I’m starting every day with my head in the shitter
Mariners/D Broncos/BSU Broncos fan in Seattle
The first rule of Lookout Landing is...
What a custerfuck this turned out to be.
by TrustBaseball on Dec 8, 2010 7:13 PM PST reply actions 6 recs
Anagram for Jack Cust is
Tjuc Sack. Ok, I got nothing.
Not encumbered by the thought process.
by Bart's Evil Twin on Dec 8, 2010 7:28 PM PST reply actions
God now I can't even LOOK at his name anymore.
Thanks everyone. Now if you will excuse me, it is time for my Customary ‘drink myself stupid’ moment. Except I need to go be a Customer at the grocery store due to a lack of beer… but that might cust too much.
For the sake of the clubhouse, I hope he's not a big Cunt
by Teej on Dec 9, 2010 12:06 AM PST reply actions 8 recs
Lookout Landing reacts to the signing of a new player.
Step one: Rumor confirmed, name checked at baseball reference or fangraphs.
Step two: Terms of deal analyzed, in terms of cash, years, and roster spaPUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS
Step three: PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS PUNS
by SeattExPat on Dec 9, 2010 6:34 AM PST reply actions 2 recs
Maybe this one is new: On July 31
Cust traded, offense loses long balls
Just picture Randichiro.
by fiftyone on Dec 9, 2010 7:52 AM PST via mobile reply actions
Bitchass Bitch to play for big ol Bitch baseBitch team
Bitchface team exec calls move “Bitchin”
by Dewey N on Dec 9, 2010 9:49 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
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