Josh Hamilton likes coke and fake boobs
From deadspin. Back in March, Josh went to a bar, got loaded and started doing body shots off the local hotties. Money quote:
"The girls left. According to one patron, Hamilton, piss-drunk by that point, asked the manager where he could buy blow. The manager didn't know. "Let's go to a strip club," Hamilton said. Someone drove Hamilton to Les Girls in Phoenix, Arizona."
Slightly NSFW. Whipped cream being licked off cleavage.
There's more schadenfreude at lonestarball.com Look here.
3 months ago
PDXTai
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God dammit, Josh.
Every man has his vices, but shit. At least stop once you notice people are taking pictures!
by Teej on Aug 9, 2009 10:28 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Addiction is a bitch.
Relapses are almost inevitable, and I wish him well.
Personally. In a professional sense, I hope his arms fall off.
by acblue on Aug 10, 2009 12:21 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Absolutely.
I was about to post something along those lines, but deleted it. But since you opened the can of worms!
I think it’s damn near impossible to be fully cured of an addiction like this. It’s not a character flaw. That’s why I say “God dammit, Josh,” because I know he’s going through some shit that will always be with him. I guess I’m thinking, perhaps unreasonably, that he should be able to keep any recurring problems fairly well hidden, because if they’re not, it hurts the positive message he has come to stand for.
Good luck, kid. I still root for you like crazy.
by Teej on Aug 10, 2009 12:52 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I actually hope that people like Josh Hamilton will say the kinds of things he said when they relapse.
“Hey, guess what; I’m sick, I got a bad genetic draw, I’m human.” Substance abuse is unfairly marginalized and honesty can help fix that.
by acblue on Aug 10, 2009 1:58 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Rec'd
I think certain people like you or I recognize that. I’ve been expecting this day for two years. It was virtually inevitable. And I agree that talking honestly about addiction can remove some of the stigma around it. But there are and always be people who see this on Deadspin and declare it a moral/character failure, and I guess I just feel bad for Hamilton and want to believe that he has it in him to, if he can’t kick it completely, at least make it look like he’s moved on for the sake of the message he’s made it so clear he wants to impart.
What’s funny is I absolutely believe Josh Hamilton will always be an addict, and there’s not much he can do about it. Yet there’s an idealistic part of me that thinks he can be a superhero. It’s not fair to expect that of him, but I just . . . hope, I guess.
by Teej on Aug 10, 2009 2:11 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
I guess I basically want people like Josh Hamilton to be Hancock
which is ironic because Jesus Christ was that movie bad. I dunno. I’d just like us to get to a point in society where we understand that the Josh Hamiltons of the world aren’t just weak-willed party animals. I also hope he is bad at baseball though.
by acblue on Aug 10, 2009 2:16 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I kinda disagree with your 2nd to last sentence. I would argue that the fact that Hamilton relapsed shows that he is weak-willed.
I’ve known a couple of people who for years and years either drunk or smoked and were able to quit cold turkey because they were very strong mentally. Seems to me that an addiction like that is mostly mental and the reason people can’t kick them is because they aren’t strong mentally.
FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!
by Goose on Aug 10, 2009 2:57 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Not everyone is the same.
Addiction isn’t only about will, it’s a chemical deficiency/dependency. With some, the dependency on the chemical involved is not as strong and the likelihood of regression is much smaller.
The difference between me and my step-dad is that while I did all of the same things (and more), when I stopped I didn’t have the night sweats, constant nightmares & migraines, etc. That comes with having the chemical dependence. Sure, I feel the draw of crank every once in a while when I’m stressed, but it’s not something that sits in the corner of my mind like it does with friends and relatives that went through the same experiences. My cousin still has constant nightmares and feels a “need” for it, despite being clean and away from the culture of it for over 10 years now.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
by Faux on Aug 10, 2009 8:54 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Have to agree with Faux on this one.
It is wise to remember that not everyone is the same. Not everyone has the same body chemistry. What looks like some victory of self-will may in fact be someone who did not have a predisposition to true addiction.
What I would accuse Hamilton of is not being smart because he very clearly put himself in a position to relapse. The best way to avoid relapse is to stay away from places where a relapse can happen and to also surround yourself with people who will not allow it to happen.
by Sec 108 on Aug 10, 2009 9:18 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey, he made the right choice.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
by Faux on Aug 10, 2009 9:06 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
This is one downside of being piss drunk
You either don’t notice those kind of details or you think you don’t care about them…..only to punch yourself later. Alcohol is much worse than teh blow in some regards. I’m most disappointed by the lack of hotness possessed by the females he’s carousing with.
At least make it worthwhile dude!
"If I'm in a slump, I ask myself for advice." -Ichiro
by Big Jared on Aug 10, 2009 12:23 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I might have been given a bad break, but I've got an awful lot to live for.
Thank you.
by JoshHamilton on Aug 9, 2009 10:34 PM PDT reply actions 3 recs
There are a lot of people who would love to take advantage of you.
You’ve got an 0-2 count and an ump with a strike zone the size of Texas calling the game. It’s not even close to fair. Maybe you should take up something less stressful like cricket?
by PDXTai on Aug 10, 2009 9:14 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hilarious.
FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!
by Goose on Aug 10, 2009 12:16 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I do.
The man falls of the wagon and has a good time. Yeah, we can talk about the moral/ethical/physiological/psychological/whatever issues about the incident, but the man didn’t cause any trouble (except maybe with his wife). Definitely not the best thing to do for a guy in his situation, but hilarious nonetheless.
by Wilder. on Aug 10, 2009 1:46 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I will submit that if I looked to Hamilton for inspiration, I would be disappointed and not find it funny.
But I don’t look to Hamilton for inspiration.
by Wilder. on Aug 10, 2009 1:53 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I have no sympathy for the man.
There are a ton of young guys that would eat dogshit for the opportunity that Josh Hamilton is pissing away. At some point you have to grow up and get your shit together.
I knew a guy that got drafted by the A’s and did the same thing. Went out every night partying his ass off, showed up still drunk to practice, and ended up getting shit canned. Now he does some shitty labor and plays slowpitch softball. What a waste.
by d0nkey on Aug 10, 2009 12:38 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, one documented relapse is really "pissing it away".
I’m practically a robot and I still empathize. It’s a struggle every day, and some days you take a step back instead of forward.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
by Faux on Aug 10, 2009 1:04 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That being said, I'm sort of sad that there's not more jokes in this thread.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
by Faux on Aug 10, 2009 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I assumed we were saving them for the next Texas series
Still, it’s one thing to make fun of someone who comes across as “all cleaned up”. Quite another to kick someone when he’s down.
This will probably be ripe joke fodder once Hamilton goes back to kicking our asses.
by PDXTai on Aug 10, 2009 1:39 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That story is not exactly rare.
I’ve known of plenty of minor leaguers who couldn’t handle it. Some pissed away signing bonuses and bailed, some were never all that into it, some were colossal dicks and alienated everyone around them, some became alcoholics on a level that most of us would be unable to fully comprehend, and others still got homesick or couldn’t adjust to the life of moving around from one city to the next and took themselves out of the game.
I don’t have patience for a lot of them, but we’re a culture that obsesses over some level of stardom, to the point where we look at anyone with talent as some kind of icon and get all huffy about them not doing more with it. Given all the factors working against them, I think it’s a near miracle when anyone makes the majors, but the fact is that even when they get to that point, they are still capable of screwing up. It’s easy to sit around and say, “oh well I never would have done that” but human nature has as much or more capacity for phenomenal fuck-ups as it does angels-singing-from-the-heavens success. We aren’t all making great decisions about what to do with our abilities all the time.
"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/
by JY on Aug 10, 2009 1:39 PM PDT up reply actions 7 recs
Agreed.
But I will say that treating some guy like a hero for overcoming addiction is upsetting, when we should be honoring those that never got addicted in the first place. The person that decided it would be a good idea to snort a white powder off a toilet seat is not more noble than the person that turned down the ecstasy tablet because he knew it would fuck you up, but the former is always the one receiving the praise while the one that made the good decision gets ignored.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on Aug 11, 2009 2:58 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Justin Sobchuk?
NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!
by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 11:34 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I've read the above and only have one question...
Who doesn’t like fake boobs?
by sliderinside on Aug 10, 2009 12:55 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Me, for one.
Fuck Anaheim.
by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth on Aug 10, 2009 1:03 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
You haven't tried them with whipped cream on top. :)
by PDXTai on Aug 10, 2009 1:36 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Whipped cream would just make it worse.
Fucking horrible stuff.
Fuck Anaheim.
by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth on Aug 10, 2009 2:40 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I detest them.
Mike Scioscia is fat.
by Big Jared on Aug 10, 2009 2:39 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Question: is there any indication, beyond the alleged drunken "where can I get some coke?" comment, that Hamilton actually used any cocaine in this incident?
I genuinely hope not, because while both addictions can be debilitating, cocaine is a much more powerful addictive than alcohol.
by Decatur on Aug 10, 2009 2:33 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Not from this article
One of the posts on deadspin stated that Les Girls is a no-alcohol joint so this may have been the end of Josh’s debauchery for the evening.
If Josh was really as drunk as alleged, he probably wouldn’t have been able to buy much of anything without help.
by PDXTai on Aug 10, 2009 2:41 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs














