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Around SBN: The Animated GIFs Of January

8/11: Open Game Thread

Chicago White Sox at Seattle Mariners, Aug 11, 2009 7:10 PM PDT





Doug Fister

#58 / Pitcher / Seattle Mariners

6-8

200

R

R

Feb 04, 1984




John Danks

#50 / Pitcher / Chicago White Sox

6-1

205

L

L

Apr 15, 1985



Yeah, these jokes won't get old.

Comment 703 comments  |  0 recs  | 

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Too bad the M's didn't win the Tazawa bidding...

Looks like a solid pitcher now with some room for improvement… signed for almost nothing.

by lailaihei on Aug 11, 2009 6:33 PM PDT reply actions  

Cause his arm is missing?

So it looks like he is fisting something?

NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!

by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 6:43 PM PDT up reply actions  

BUT I HARDLY KNOW HER!

Alright, that’s it for my Fister jokes.

by Robert Lintott on Aug 11, 2009 6:41 PM PDT reply actions  

I hate Detroit.

Beat Boston for once, ya losers.

A Mariners fan in Seattle

by Coach Owens on Aug 11, 2009 6:42 PM PDT reply actions  

I see what you did there.

I’m happy that even at my advanced age I’m capable of Beavis and Butthead laughter

Mike Scioscia is fat.

by Big Jared on Aug 11, 2009 6:42 PM PDT reply actions  

AHHH!

nevermind.

NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!

by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 6:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

Yes sir, I'm losing the next couple of hours to this.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 6:51 PM PDT up reply actions  

Andres Esquibel sucks.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 6:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'm watching this because I don't have MLB.tv and this is better than Gameday.

Also, you know, minor league baseball.

I want to see the ’Sox hit now. Stop sucking Esquibel.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 6:56 PM PDT up reply actions  

And then Gebbers scores on the WP.

Crashing into the pitcher in the process, both of them standing up.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 7:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

Where did Laffey come from?

Seriously, that guy has been incredible his past few starts.

by uw_chris on Aug 11, 2009 6:57 PM PDT up reply actions  

Wooooooooo a Russell Branyan HR montage!

You got slurved!

The M's are why the suicide rates are so high in the PNW and Japan.

by Slurvey on Aug 11, 2009 6:56 PM PDT reply actions  

Im disappointed in the Krueger

Was hoping for “Fist the Sox” as a key to the game.

by ColeFitz88 on Aug 11, 2009 7:02 PM PDT reply actions  

That's because you don't fist the sox.

You use them to clean up afterward.

...and now I'm here

by CapSea on Aug 11, 2009 7:07 PM PDT up reply actions  

He was retaliating from an earlier incident.

And it was the second person he threw at; missed the first.

by Wilder. on Aug 11, 2009 7:10 PM PDT up reply actions  

It wasn't like the pitch just knicked him

It hit him square in the back

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:10 PM PDT up reply actions  

If I had a dollar for every time I flipped off a camera

I would be a couple dozen dollars richer

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

Kevin Youkilis

Makes Jack Wilson look like Johnny Depp.

~I'm on the DA~

by section331 on Aug 11, 2009 7:13 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Mr. Clean has really let himself go

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

So the AL central just throws at each other?

So I can expect at least one incident this series with the WSox?

by w00tah on Aug 11, 2009 7:11 PM PDT up reply actions  

Game On!!!

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:11 PM PDT reply actions  

STRIKE?

Umpires fucking suck

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 7:12 PM PDT reply actions  

Without the Bama Bangs

Beckham is only a third as cool

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:12 PM PDT reply actions  

Holy shit

Nice effort, Jack.

Fuck Anaheim.

by Eyeball Kid on Aug 11, 2009 7:15 PM PDT reply actions  

Holy range batman!

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:15 PM PDT reply actions  

How the hell did Wilson get to that ball?

That little 180 pivot throw thing he does is pretty.

by Zwakamatsu on Aug 11, 2009 7:16 PM PDT reply actions  

Yuni would have had that

Granted, it would have been because he didn’t realize the shift was on

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:16 PM PDT reply actions  

I love the fact that we're praising effort.

I don’t think I’ve seen that happen in a while…

~I'm on the DA~

by section331 on Aug 11, 2009 7:16 PM PDT reply actions  

It's Kenji right now, I think

he’s making no effort to steal strikes, and Fister is right around the edges of the zone

by seattlebruin on Aug 11, 2009 7:17 PM PDT up reply actions  

Boom

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:17 PM PDT reply actions  

Lots of groundballs. Neat.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:18 PM PDT reply actions  

Guti!!!

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:22 PM PDT reply actions  

Looks like a nice day for baseball

should have headed down to the ballpark

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:26 PM PDT reply actions  

OH NOW I GET IT

Fister is similar to the term fisting so when you make these jokes you are presuming that he frequently enages in the act that his name is similar to his last name.

by Robert on Aug 11, 2009 7:30 PM PDT reply actions  

.

Heh

NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!

by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 7:33 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

DO I click oh god oh god...

You got slurved!

The M's are why the suicide rates are so high in the PNW and Japan.

by Slurvey on Aug 11, 2009 7:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

Phew

You got slurved!

The M's are why the suicide rates are so high in the PNW and Japan.

by Slurvey on Aug 11, 2009 7:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

Fisted!!!

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:30 PM PDT reply actions  

Probably

I’m not stupid enough to look up anything called fisting with no filter

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

Ok, so wait

What’s the thing with Thursday and Mariners BP?

~I'm on the DA~

by section331 on Aug 11, 2009 7:34 PM PDT reply actions  

Damn.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:34 PM PDT reply actions  

Just tuned in. Holy crap - not a bad pitcher.

I still hate him because of what we’re going to put up with given his name.

Illegible

by kevin_ess on Aug 11, 2009 7:35 PM PDT reply actions  

As long as he's good

I’m not worried about it, personally…

~I'm on the DA~

by section331 on Aug 11, 2009 7:36 PM PDT up reply actions  

You mean the Boise Hawks/Aquasox game or...?

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 7:41 PM PDT up reply actions  

WHO ISN'T ON THE LIST?

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 7:44 PM PDT up reply actions  

Tim McClellan usually does a superb job of calling balls and strikes correctly, actually.

He just has that ultra-slow strike call that annoys people.

He’s one of the few actually decent ones that comes to mind.

Jigsaw falling into place

by esoteric on Aug 11, 2009 7:46 PM PDT up reply actions  

enough hard contact

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:44 PM PDT reply actions  

come on

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:44 PM PDT reply actions  

Jesus fucking christ.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:44 PM PDT reply actions  

.

NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!

by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 7:46 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

SOMEBODY HIRE THAT ROBOT!

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/marinersminors/

by JY on Aug 11, 2009 7:47 PM PDT up reply actions  

EverytimeyouleaveIJermaineDyealittle

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:47 PM PDT reply actions  

At least he didn't plunk Dye

didn’t need more Black Panther jokes

by gilmeche55 on Aug 11, 2009 7:47 PM PDT reply actions  

SHIFT

Thanks, Wak!

I wear orange hunting glasses to play baseball.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 7:49 PM PDT reply actions  

Micheal Saunders=Ichiro Mark II

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:51 PM PDT reply actions  

SAUNDERS

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

I wear orange hunting glasses to play baseball.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 7:51 PM PDT reply actions  

SAUNDERS!

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 7:51 PM PDT reply actions  

Wait, MICHAEL SAUNDERS IS WHITE???

I always assumed he was a black guy for some reason.

Jigsaw falling into place

by esoteric on Aug 11, 2009 7:51 PM PDT reply actions  

Canadian = White

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

No need to make up names

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:54 PM PDT up reply actions  

Michael Saunders channeling Carlos Gomez

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:51 PM PDT reply actions  

Angel ball!

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:52 PM PDT reply actions  

Wonder if that bunt was called

or Saunders was showing initiative

ignacio

by ignacio on Aug 11, 2009 7:52 PM PDT reply actions  

ICH-I-RO! ICH-I-RO! ICH-IRO!

ALL DAY LOOOOOOOOONGGGGGGGGGG

Wak Ball is right, IceStorm!
Let’s go Guti!!!

I wear orange hunting glasses to play baseball.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 7:52 PM PDT reply actions  

Google image search

Fisting Gif – And look in the upper right.

NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!

by Scruffy Lefty on Aug 11, 2009 7:56 PM PDT up reply actions  

Shit.

Come on Loopy.

I wear orange hunting glasses to play baseball.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 7:54 PM PDT reply actions  

I do it all the time

Some of us like supporting our teams no matter where we are at.

by Robert on Aug 11, 2009 8:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

Sims

What the fuck is wrong with me?

~I'm on the DA~

by section331 on Aug 11, 2009 7:57 PM PDT up reply actions  

KK

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 7:58 PM PDT reply actions  

MUSCCCCCCCCLEEEEEEEE

MUSCLES > PLATINUM HAIR

I wear orange hunting glasses to play baseball.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 7:59 PM PDT reply actions  

I'm liking that change.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 7:59 PM PDT reply actions  

WHAT THE FUCK

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:00 PM PDT reply actions  

OH MY GOD

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:00 PM PDT reply actions  

Seriously?

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:01 PM PDT up reply actions  

One was borderline.

But I don’t really have gripes given how the rest of them have been called.

FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Fuckmikereilly on Aug 11, 2009 8:02 PM PDT up reply actions  

Side saddle action

I hope you die. I hope we BOTH die.

by BRKLN M'S on Aug 11, 2009 8:01 PM PDT reply actions  

Side saddle action

Sims is in on it.

Mike Scioscia is fat.

by Big Jared on Aug 11, 2009 8:01 PM PDT reply actions  

ADRIAN!!

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 8:05 PM PDT reply actions  

Yay!

But fuck that keeps happening

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 8:06 PM PDT reply actions  

MUSCLEEEEE

YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! Silly baserunning though. :)

I believe in Jack Z.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 8:06 PM PDT reply actions  

Yippe K Yeh

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 8:06 PM PDT reply actions  

Runs are cool

I hope you die. I hope we BOTH die.

by BRKLN M'S on Aug 11, 2009 8:06 PM PDT reply actions  

That's twice now that's happened.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:06 PM PDT reply actions  

In the last two games.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:07 PM PDT up reply actions  

RBI!

He finally beat the shift

ignacio

by ignacio on Aug 11, 2009 8:07 PM PDT reply actions  

Josh right?

You gotta be joshin’ me

by JBell523 on Aug 11, 2009 8:10 PM PDT up reply actions  

Jack Z has a funny way of posturing.

(Jeff is currently closing his eyes in anger)

by Matthew on Aug 11, 2009 8:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

I don't know why people give Churchill so much shit now, anyways.

He doesn’t really claim everything he says as fact any more. Almost anything is disclaimer’d

by lailaihei on Aug 11, 2009 8:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

The only thing I would say

is to go back and look through the archives and chart how often the stuff he says actually happens compared to here and USSM.

by Matthew on Aug 11, 2009 8:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

Yes!

Brush them back! Brush them back! Brush them back!

by Wilder. on Aug 11, 2009 8:23 PM PDT reply actions  

Fister is endangering his teammates

Ozzie is a highly unstable element.

Mike Scioscia is fat.

by Big Jared on Aug 11, 2009 8:24 PM PDT reply actions  

Go Angels

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 8:24 PM PDT reply actions  

There is no nice way to say it

The Angels are fucking cunts

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 8:24 PM PDT reply actions  

I understand the theory

I just can’t bring my self to root for them.

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 8:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'm okay with Batista..

..if we had a 30-run lead.

I believe in Jack Z.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 8:25 PM PDT reply actions  

KKK

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 8:27 PM PDT reply actions  

Fister!

Sick stuff right there.

by Heydude on Aug 11, 2009 8:27 PM PDT reply actions  

How did that pitch not get destroyed?

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:27 PM PDT reply actions  

Luck.

Let’s be honest.

Jigsaw falling into place

by esoteric on Aug 11, 2009 8:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

Alex Rios

I apologize if this has been answered already, but will we be seeing him tomorrow?

I believe in Jack Z.

by MuscleManyan on Aug 11, 2009 8:28 PM PDT reply actions  

Nice 2 seamer

now get it down in the zone.

by TrashiDawa on Aug 11, 2009 8:28 PM PDT reply actions  

NICE

My Mariners blog - SodoMojo Twitter Feed, Fuck the fucking Angels!

by gregrabble on Aug 11, 2009 8:28 PM PDT reply actions  

KKKK

Don't believe the lies Bill!!!! look at the sparkly ERA!!! Sparkly, Sparkly!!! - McCovey Chronicles

by Trenchtown on Aug 11, 2009 8:28 PM PDT reply actions  

K's, BB's and few hits.

You fuckers lied to me.

FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Fuckmikereilly on Aug 11, 2009 8:29 PM PDT reply actions  

I can't believe that start just happened.

FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS! FUCK THE ANGELS!

by Goose on Aug 11, 2009 8:29 PM PDT reply actions  

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