Larry Stone, bring in da news!

The Mariners have activated relief pitcher Roy Corcoran, who has been on the disabled list since April 30 with a strained neck. Corcoran, for now, will take the roster spot of catcher Rob Johnson, who was placed on the bereavement list. No details yet available, except that it's a family emergency.

Righteous.

I hope whatever the emergency is, it resolves itself well. I may vehemently dislike Rob Johnson's current skill level and the praise for his defense, but I do not wish harm upon random other people just because they know Rob Johnson. I bet he's a very nice fellow in fact.