5/5: Open Game Thread, Part 3
by Jeff Sullivan on May 5, 2009 4:03 PM PDT
in Seattle Mariners Game Threads
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AARDSMA
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This team is murder to my blood pressure.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
I'm beginning to realize there is no point in watching the first 8 innings of Mariner games
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
except then I can't see how we've possibly only allowed 1 run on 11 hits
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
At least it's an interesting season
Though I’d like some more blowout wins
On the plus side
The Rangers just had an inning as frustrating as our last chance was yesterday. Rangers fans everywhere are cursing.
WOOO RALLY PUPPY
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Wait
did he just bring in the guy that got cut by the Nationals?
That was tons of luck
WIth anti-control like that I don’t blame the Umpires for giving him the suck-on-it of the doubt.
They shouldn't
The Mariners are much better
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Darren O'Day?
It’s the bottom of the 9th and the Rangers turn to a guy who was DFA’d two weeks ago. By the Angels.
We're the home team, duh.
They have to use our logic.
Wasn't Gameday Premium supposed to come with MLB.tv Premium?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
I'm logged in and watching MLB.tv Premium right now
but no gameday
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
You have to log into MLB.com as well.
Click on one of the blue “Premium” words and it’ll give you a login prompt.
One hit by Vincente fucking Padilla.
So, are Clement and Ronny Cedeno on fucking milk cartons yet?
GOD.
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:08 PM PDT reply actions
It's Darren O'fucking Day. Come on guys.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
No lucky pop fly for a hit for Meat Loaf today.
"I have two normal feet and I can't see the slightest God-damned reason why anybody should stare at them."
by ImaginaryRomances on May 5, 2009 4:09 PM PDT reply actions
Again:
IT’S DARREN O’FUCKING DAY DO SOMETHING ASSHOLES
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Well, I don't think this one is going 15.
by shinallsrevenge on May 5, 2009 4:11 PM PDT up reply actions
Why not?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Curse you, Andrus.
Curse your excellent range and slick fielding.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Can we get Jon Daniels really smashed and convince him to trade us Andrus for Yuni?
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
OH GREAT NOW I REALLY NEED TO GO TO BED AND THIS HAPPENS
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
Hope they keep O'Day in for next inning
I have a feeling Beltre would do ok with him
Where is Matt Kata?
NEEDS MORE FREEDOM!
by Scruffy Lefty on May 5, 2009 4:13 PM PDT up reply actions
You're in first place. Shut up.
They hate the Angels, clearly.
angels fan in seattle
by Eyebrows on May 5, 2009 4:15 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
You have won a world championship, so at least they've liked you in the past.
But point taken for this year.
Can anybody watching on TV tell me what happened?
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Yeah, that really looks like an oblique injury
Usually those take months. Fuck.
by Smegmalicious on May 5, 2009 4:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Shawn Kelley's arm just came off
and he’s gushing blood out of the stump and it’s really making a mess for the groundskeepers. They have to reform the mound now.
angels fan in seattle
FUCK
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
WTF happened
How and why and WTF OH DEAR GOD KILL ME NOW
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
Well, once again, God pees on us.
First Lowe, now Kelley. :(
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:16 PM PDT reply actions
I hate that fucking dog.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
No TV Here.
What happened to Shawn? What’s hurt? How? Just pitching?
tbd
From what I heard on the radio feed
He collapsed after throwing a pitch, and was clutching his left side. Possibly an oblique injury.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Walked off, but Niehaus made it clear he was in obvious pain.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Yeah
The pitch previous, he stepped off and walked around, kinda stretching funny. The ump even stepped to the side. Then he toed back on, pitched and fell over. could be a hernia or something. He was limping as he walked off. Groin? Hip? who knows.
by 88fingerslukee on May 5, 2009 4:19 PM PDT up reply actions
Aaaaaaaahhhhhh
Sports bar / no sound, what happened?
by Mariner Optimist on May 5, 2009 4:18 PM PDT reply actions
Hooray it's Denny Stark
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Kelley was rubbing his hip after the second pitch.
On the third, he immediately collapsed in obvious pain, grabbing around his left hip area.
Looked like he knew he was hurt and kept going
Hope he didn’t hurt it worse than it would’ve been with that next pitch.
Im stuck listening to the Rangers broadcast.
They are very angered by the disparity in hits. Yet a 1-1 game
He'll be back in business in 2011
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Not his arm
not his arm, not his arm, not his arm
by Fuckmikereilly on May 5, 2009 4:20 PM PDT up reply actions
NOB
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
by EnglishMariner on May 5, 2009 4:20 PM PDT up reply actions
Oh its painful to be an Englishman right now!
by Smegmalicious on May 5, 2009 4:21 PM PDT up reply actions
It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside.
Like a Branyan funk blast, or an Ichiro single.
by Smegmalicious on May 5, 2009 4:25 PM PDT up reply actions
Time for one of our patented 7-game losing streaks!
by .Taylor on May 5, 2009 4:20 PM PDT reply actions
Oh my girlfriend love pugs
I do not see the resemblance though.
by Fin on May 5, 2009 4:23 PM PDT up reply actions
HEY PITCH DOWN IN THE ZONE PLEASE BEFORE YOU RUIN MY NIGHT
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
Oblique
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
by EnglishMariner on May 5, 2009 4:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Looked like a side muscle, oblique
he tweaked it on the pitch before and looked really uncomfortable, then dropped like a sack of potatoes on the next one
I felt that it was more of a hip, groin thing
Do oblique injuries make you limp?
by 88fingerslukee on May 5, 2009 4:24 PM PDT up reply actions
Well
There you go then. Thanks, I’ve never had one of those before. The others – to which I can attest – also make you limp.
by 88fingerslukee on May 5, 2009 4:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Stark doesn't just pitch to contact
He pitches to Ichiro… Brilliant!
by Mariner Optimist on May 5, 2009 4:23 PM PDT reply actions
Hopefully Kelley recovers since the last time our relief ace went down it was Mark Lowe.
But Lowe had surgery on his arm and Kelley has a problem with his Oblique/Back/Side so hopefully he isn’t out for long.
You got slurved bitch.
Denny Stark is pitching and he knows a win is inevitable?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
HI I'M DENNY STARK AND I LOVE GIVING UP LINE DRIVES BECAUSE I'M AN ASSHOLE WHO SUCKS AT BASEBALL
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
It's like a recurring damn nightmare with this bullpen lately
Two outs and then a fucking disaster
To be fair, it was pretty disastrous during the first two outs two
a long flyball and a warning track line drive.
You can tell the Rangers haven't been in contention in years.
There play by play guy is going nuts
Choke on a dick Denny.
On the other hand, Wlad has quite a gun.
Denny Stark is still not very good
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Oh God so we have to choose between:
Kahn/Gaby Hernandez/Luis Pena/Vega/Thomas/Olsen to replace Kelley unless we call-up a position player if Kelley goes onto the DL.
You got slurved bitch.
That second option sounds good
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
If only we had a LH bat in our minor league system who was at least a ~ MLB hitter.
Even if he sucked at a defensive position where we’re playing complete sacks of crap.
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Is anybody on the waiver wire right now?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
I was really hoping Denny Stark could be a warm fuzzy smile story, but nope
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
I WOULD FEEL A LOT BETTER ABOUT THIS IF OUR OFFENSE DIDN'T HIT LIKE LITTLE, LITTLE GIRLS
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Can someone remind me again why Denny Stark is on the major league team?
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Needs more rally rash
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:28 PM PDT up reply actions
If you define depth as having
an unlimited supply of mediocre guys pulled off the scrap heap, then yeah
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:29 PM PDT up reply actions
Hello
My name is Denny Stark and I’M A BUTTFUCKING BRADY BUNCH
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:28 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Oh hey, another Yuni gaffe.
In other news, the sun rises in the east.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Holy shit we have 1 run on 1 hit. They have 3 runs on 15 hits.
I haven’t been watching, but this is DEFINITELY a game we deserve to lose. Texas must have like 30 LOB
Rangers announcers
“In Betancourt’s defense he has a library of spectacular plays”
All of them were made in 2005 though :(
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
They obviously haven't uptaded their library since 2005.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Ummm
I guess that’s true, considering it’s probably possible to download copies of all the ESPN web gems from somewhere
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:30 PM PDT up reply actions
Sure, from 2005.
The last couple of years, not so much, unless you consider Derek Jeter-style waves at balls up the middle “spectacular”.
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:31 PM PDT up reply actions
If he had made it it would have been a good play
But you probably couldn’t expect him to make that play.
15 hits to 1 hit
I’m not watching this fucking shit anymore
more Mariners for me
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
DFA THIS ASSHOLE
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
This is a multi-year rebuild
Bavasi left essentially zero lefty bats in this organization despite a ballpark that destroys righties… Today is the day the canary sang in the coalmine…
YEAH SEASON OVER WE LOST A GAME FUCK IT EVEN IF WE ARE IN FIRST PLACE FUCK THIS I'M NEVER WATCHING ANOTHER MARINERS GAME AGAIN
by Aaron Campeau on May 5, 2009 4:33 PM PDT up reply actions
FIRE ZDURIENCIK BLOW IT UP THIS FRANCHISE IS HOPELESS.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
If the canary is singing in the coal mine, that means that all is well and the air is reasonably safe.
If the canary dies, that’s when you start to worry.
idk why wak brings in these guys with the game on the line.
like having batista in with the game on the line vs oak.
We needed somebody to eat innings and we were out of pitchers vs Oakland?
This time I have no idea
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
we had vargas. one would think batista would be the absolue last option.
by sunlightgraham on May 5, 2009 4:33 PM PDT up reply actions
Vargas hadn't pitched in the majors yet
Sort of an unknown commodity- I would have gone with Batista too
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
No shit
Strike 2 was NOT a strike
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:33 PM PDT up reply actions
And ball 2 was a strike
So I guess we’re even now.
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:34 PM PDT up reply actions
Im getting sick of this little fuck Josh Lewin (or whatever his name is)
That little bitch is getting cocky about his precious little Rangers finally being a remotely respectable team.
My first game ever at Safeco...
Wow look what Denny Stark did.
GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN DENNY STARK HOW HAVE YOU BEEN
Don't forget Joe Table!
Yayyyy I got to see him in person!
It would be fucking hilarious if the M's came back and won this
on a bunch of ‘Matt Kata’ plays. I miss Matt Kata
Nice call SB
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
YOU CAN PUT IT ON TE BOARD
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Ok I just jinxed us so I'm gonna leave.
So if JArrod Saltnefefbehfb hits a GS I’m outta here.
You got slurved bitch.
I love rooting for this team
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
FREE GARRETT OLSON
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
I really hope we somehow win this
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
To top it off, I think Kelley is due for the loss
Fuck you Denny Stark
They've had that since the minute Kelley went down
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:36 PM PDT up reply actions
Might as well have him pitch his arm off
Before they DFA him
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
It would suck to work your way back to the Majors after all that time only to realize you still don't belong there
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Well, Denny, if you're going to do that
You might as well let them bat around.
GOD.
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:36 PM PDT reply actions
So it's YOUR fault!
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:37 PM PDT up reply actions
What a crappy series
With Felix and Bedard going, there’s no reason we shoudn’t have swept the Rangers. Gah.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Welcome to "this really is a ~.500 team!"
Population: Seattle Mariners. Enjoy your stay!
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:38 PM PDT up reply actions
Time to do a big trade with Tacoma.
To Tacoma:
Denny Stark
Yuni
Batista
Silva
Rob Johnson
To Seattle:
Garrett Olson
Andy Baldwin
Jeff Clement
Chris Woodward
Eric Hull
Tacoma would never take it
Even if we agreed to eat salary
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Though I would love to see Phat Andy up in Seattle
IF I WAS MANAGER I'D HAVE A FIST FIGHT WITH YUNI RIGHT NOW AND KNOCK HIS FUCKING MONKEY HEAD CLEAN OFF (~EM)
by seattlecougar on May 5, 2009 4:38 PM PDT up reply actions
Rosterbation.
That will never happen. That’s about as likely as one of AK1984’s Weaver, Sexson, Batista for A-ROD proposals.
Callbacks like this are best left to people who were around and posting at the time it occurred.
Otherwise you come off as a party-crasher.
Not even Russ Branyan can save us now :(
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
They go that low but I don't think they can go that high
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
And I figure 0% odds of being on the roster in about an hour.
Since the bullpen’s kinda shot right now, might as well DL Kelley and send Stark back to Tacoma.
by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2009 4:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Rizzs says Kelley has an oblique strain.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Come on guys! We can do this!
NEVER GIVE UP! NEVER SURRENDER!
"Rob Johnson's on deck"
My heart: “Oh fuck this”.
Yay Bob Johnson
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Good thing Wlad swung 3-1 with a 5 run deficit
High IQ on these M’s…
He swung at a belt high pitch in his wheelhouse.
by Aaron Campeau on May 5, 2009 4:45 PM PDT up reply actions
Mariners' don't have wheelhouses
They have bonerzones
(not a good thing)
by Jordan of Boise on May 5, 2009 4:46 PM PDT up reply actions
We should probably consider calling up Steven Shell
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Oh darn
they actually know how to change pitchers. We’re screwed.
I'm more like I am now than I've ever been.
Pitching change for Rob FUCKING Johnson?
I hate you Ron FUCKING Washington.
So it's 7-2 and it doesn't really matter
but can we get Wak some healthy position players so I can go ape shit on him the next time he decides not to pinch hit for Rob Johnson?
I like how the Schik Shadel guy sounds like he never actually quit drinking.
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
Maybe Francisco won't be available tomorrow and they'll lose. That'd be funny.
I hope you die. I hope we BOTH die.
Ichiro for the tie, Loafie for the win?
I’ve read this script.
I'm more like I am now than I've ever been.
WHY THE FUCK IS ROB TRYING TO BUNT
Is that the light at the end of the tunnel, or the headlights of an oncoming train?
It's his way of brown-nosing the coaching staff for more playing time.
Damn it why can’t Clement kiss ass like this.
Well you deserved that one Gutz
have to factor in that the umpire is totally incompetent
GOD DAMMIT GUTZ
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
If Yuni hits a home run I reserve the right to laugh
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
It would take a decade for me to get drunk :(
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Every strike he takes, you dirnk. Every ball he swings at you drink.
There you go. Shitfaced by the end of the game.
by Smegmalicious on May 5, 2009 4:54 PM PDT up reply actions
UMPIRES > DENNY STARK still
but baaaarely. Jesus Christ what is this
If we can find somebody who's big league ready, I'm all for it.
Otherwise, I don’t mind seeing Stark in AAA.
Just to tease us!
Goddamn it Yuni. God. Damn. It.
FUCK YOU YUNI
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU I WOULD NOT PISS ON YOU IF YOU WERE ON FIRE I WOULD NOT STOP FOR YOU IF YOU WALKED IN FRONT OF MY CAR I HATE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD AND I JUST WANT YOU TO GO AWAY
by Aaron Campeau on May 5, 2009 4:54 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Do you think he would take pitches if you threatened his life? With a gun?
I hope you die. I hope we BOTH die.
The one positive I've taken from these games is that Yuni continues to blatantly suck in every facet of the game
If the FO/coaching staff doesn’t realize that he’s freaking awful than they are idiots and we are boned anyways
I want Robot Umpires!
I hope you die. I hope we BOTH die.
by BRKLN M'S on May 5, 2009 4:54 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Alright.
Time to start checking on the minor leagues. Hopefully there’s some good news on that front tonight.
I think I've found a new hobby:
Messing with the Twitter ads on the front page.
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