Leadership
by Jeff Sullivan on Feb 19, 2009 7:07 PM PST
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PrintSURPRISE, Ariz. | Royals outfielder José Guillen expects to return to full-time drills, perhaps by this weekend, after easing the pain in his right big toe by yanking out a severely ingrown nail.
..."I reached in there (with the tweezers)," he said, "and poked around until I got the end of it. Then I counted one, two, three and just pulled …. Oh, my God. It came out, but tears were running down my cheeks."
Club officials weren't particularly pleased by the self-surgery but indicated the biggest concern now is avoiding an infection.
If Erik Bedard were a real man, he would've grabbed tweezers and a mirror and fixed his shoulder himself.
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I will attest that ripping out a nail hurts like a motherfucker.
Although I have no clue why someone that has a Dr. on call and millions of dollars would do it himself.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
...
man moron
I’ve had to rip two nails out on my own, but one involved no health insurance, and the other was about 10 hours from civilization.
Anything else is just idiocy, and I hope that it gets infected and they refuse to pay him for missed games.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
That only really works for surface infections.
You really need to get it in there for toenails, and that sometimes doesn’t even work if he opened it deep and it closed over a bit.
And do you really think he went right to a trainer right after ripping it out, or did he wrap it up and limp around a bit first so he could go brag about it for a while?
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
Point taken....but no, he prolly didn't go to the trainer right after
It was likely the gimping around camp that made the trainers go and see him
You cant buy that sort of vetran grittyness
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.
Grit is if you use your teeth to do it.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
Uh?
Tweezers for your self-surgery: $5
Telling the media all about it: Priceless!
We all know about Manny being Manny. I guess this is Jose being Jose.
"We are a bad defensive team." -B. Cashman
I wouldn't mess with a guy who pulls out his own toe nails
Not only is he fucking insane but he also isn’t afraid of pain. Jose Guillen, I’m pretty sure you could whoop my ass.
He didn't pull out the whole toenail
Just the bit that grew in.
by Jeff Sullivan on Feb 19, 2009 7:46 PM PST up reply actions
Oh well then why is this even a story?
And why is he missing any time for this?
by Edgar for Pres on Feb 19, 2009 9:45 PM PST up reply actions
"If Erik Bedard were a real man, he would've grabbed tweezers and a mirror and fixed his shoulder himself."
you know, Furness pretty much said the same thing the other day.
I believe his descriptive phrase of choice was “candyass.”
RUB SOME DIRT IN IT
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
No Mariner shall ever compare to Bret Boone's candyassery
by Jeff Sullivan on Feb 19, 2009 7:54 PM PST up reply actions
Isn't that
the one and only Fridge Largemeat?
Flint Ironstag?
Stump Beefgnaw?
Punch Rockgroin?
Punch Sideiron?
Gristle McThornBody?
Slab Squatthrust?
Big McLargeHuge?
On second thought using a mirror would be the woman's way out
A man would do it with tweezers and a shadow.
Tweezers are for little girls
A real man would dig it out with a rusty nail
Or he wouldn't pluck it out at all
choosing instead to feed off the pain like some maniacal beast who still happens to be a man.
A real man would use rusty tools and do it by braille
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Feb 20, 2009 8:35 AM PST up reply actions
At what point didn't he know that they have people hired by the team to do crap like that?
I mean, those people have a whole room for that stuff. Usually, those rooms are were all the lockers are.
If it isn't that bad, its pretty easy to do it yourself
A little rubbing alcohol and a six pack is really all you need.
by Edgar for Pres on Feb 19, 2009 9:48 PM PST up reply actions
Ichiro would never do this.
Therefore he’s obviously inferior. No wonder nobody likes him, talk about selfishness.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
Ichiro hurts his team
by not allowing his toenails to become ingrown so he can rip them out with tweezers to inspire his teammates.
If he was a Real Man
He’d cut off the whole toe so this kinda thing would’ve never happen again.
Your favorite meme is dead
I mean I've pulled out my own ingrown toenail before.
Of course its much easier to have a doctor to do it.
As someone who currently has six stitches in his finger,
I don’t know if I can yank them out myself seven days from now. Ughhhh.
61/755: KGJ's homer totals, or Rosie O'Donnell's age/weight in 2019?
You don't "yank" stitches.
You gnaw them.
(or borrow a pair of manicure scissors and snip snip snip.)
I've always found that plain old nail clippers work the best.
For both cutting and pulling.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
Getting stitches sucks, pulling them out is pretty cool.
Usually doesn’t even hurt. I swear.
Just make sure to grab the knot side.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
Just let the skin grow back over top of them so you only have little tiny bits poking out
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Feb 20, 2009 8:38 AM PST up reply actions
I actually do this
I got sick of going to doctors for ingrown toenails, so I just get nail clippers, run them across the nail to get to the ingrown part, and rip the sucker out.
Maybe Jose and I are in the ‘especially psychotic’ category, but I never thought it was that big a deal. Hurts like hell for a few minutes while you’re disinfecting the bastard, but after that the pressure subsides dramatically.
And so ends me delving into my ingrown nail-removal process for hopefully the remainder of my life.
You and Jose should read this
It might really help
I am no longer in Spokane, but I think I'll keep the name anyway.
I stopped getting mine after ripping out the whole nail entirely.
It's hard to convince people to let you eat them if you're an asshole. - Thingray
The fuck are you going on about?
If Erik Bedard were a real man, he would’ve grabbed tweezers and a mirror and fixed his shoulder himself.
If Eric Bedard were a real man he’d have pitched like shit all season then blamed it on the injury he’d been hiding thereby earning the respect of Silva, Putz, and Miguel Cairo for playing the game the right way.
by Bearskin Rugburn on Feb 20, 2009 6:59 PM PST reply actions
And Miguel Batista
Who recently revealed that he had two broken bones in his back last year (before Spring Training no less).
Damn..and Jarrod Washburn never ran him over either.
I fucking hate you Mariners
by kentroyals5 on Feb 20, 2009 10:16 PM PST up reply actions
Me, a pair of pliars, and a bottle of Jack Daniels.
How I removed a toenail that needed to come off after dropping something heavy on it at work. Like Guillen, I hate doctors and wasn’t about to fly home to a hospital to do something I could just as easily do myself.
Fear the NPE
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