I Love You, Jack
I love you. I am in love with you.
7 recs |
154 comments
|
Comments
Maybe they could have a limo pulling up, and hundreds of screaming girls surrounding it, and then Lowe and Aardsma are looking on and pondering which superstar is about to get out of the limo ... and then Jack emerges and is mobbed by the fans.
by EnglishMariner on Dec 18, 2009 1:19 PM PST up reply actions 6 recs
Someone make this happen
~wu tang banger
36 styles of danger~
by cedarA on Dec 18, 2009 1:27 PM PST via mobile up reply actions
Rather than Lowe and Aardsma
I’d have Griffey, Ichiro & Felix standing around looking for a bigger star.
Or he takes a Huffy and a double cheese burger and trades it for a Hover Craft
Or he takes the Mariner Moose and trades him for the Laker Girls
Or he takes Carlos Silva and trades him for Milton Bradley
by moose_knuckle on Dec 18, 2009 2:01 PM PST up reply actions 3 recs
I think he needs to win rally fries
And maybe dance with the groundskeepers too.
Rooting for lovable losers since 1984.
by seattlecougar on Dec 18, 2009 1:55 PM PST up reply actions
That's it!
The only Jack can do to be even more awesome is abolish rally fries!
Fuck Anaheim.
by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth on Dec 18, 2009 1:57 PM PST up reply actions
*The only thing
Fuck Anaheim.
by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth on Dec 18, 2009 1:58 PM PST up reply actions
I go out drinking
wake up around 1pm today, come on LL, and see Silva traded for Bradley. My hangover is gone. I love you Jack Z!
by Fear on Dec 18, 2009 1:23 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
And Not Some Namby-Pamby, "Pure" and "Chaste" Love
No, no. We’re talking about a dirty, smutty, sexual love, with deep roots in forbidden desires.
Yes, We should change the lookout landing pic of Sexson
And replace it with Zduriencik!
For the 500th time, it's never getting changed.
It stands as a tribute to all that we have gone through.
by Matthew on Dec 18, 2009 1:53 PM PST up reply actions 3 recs
Seriously 2008 was the worst season ever and it shouldn't have been
We should never forget where such deep ignorance led us to so we never, ever go there again.
If only...
Jeff Kent could be coerced out of retirement. Then this team would be complete.
by portablestsanzas on Dec 18, 2009 1:33 PM PST reply actions
And yes, I made two David Thorne references within 24 hours.
...and now I'm here
Screw Matt Wieters and Jason Kendall, we need Jack Zduriencik Facts.
(my mediocre attempts below)
Alchemists have been trying to figure out how to turn lead into gold for hundreds of years. Jack Zduriencik figured it out in 2nd grade.
Jack Zduriencik haggled down the price of his Mercedes Benz to 5 pennies and a stapler (the stapler had a career year but was replacement level at best).
It was actually Jack Zduriencik, not Bill Clinton, who negotiated the release of the imprisoned American journalists in Korea.
Unlike Chuck Norris and Matt Wieters Facts, no Jack Zduriencik Fact is hyperbole. Jack Zduriencik is in reality unbelievably amazing.
Man, what a fun week to be a Mariners fan!
Not sure there has been a better one.
Does anyone else think that Jack Zduriencik is as cute as a little baby when he smiles?

by Decatur on Dec 18, 2009 2:09 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Which cheeks?
I will smash your face into a jelly.
by Phildopip on Dec 18, 2009 2:10 PM PST up reply actions 3 recs
He looks like your grandpa who always buys you awesome birthday presents
and gives you candy when your parents aren’t around.
by I Lick Squirrels on Dec 18, 2009 2:10 PM PST up reply actions
What is this strange feeling?
I feel so full of…what’s the opposite of shame? Pride? No, not that far from shame. Less shame? Yeah…
I will smash your face into a jelly.
by Phildopip on Dec 18, 2009 2:07 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
What an unbelievable week this man has had.
Who in their wildest dreams could’ve imagined such a swift turnaround from the Bavasi cauldron of doom?
I’m running out of ways to express my adulation of this man and his work…Jack Zduriencik, you are the unquestioned “man” in baseball right now.
Thank you Armstrong, Lincoln, and shadowy ownership for making this man ours. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I remember being disappointed when we picked him over some of the other GMs in the running.
Turns out I’m a fucking idiot.
50!
That was a common sentiment among the USSM / LL crowd
unless I’m mistaken. But I don’t think that it was idiotic, given the evidence we possessed and our knowledge of those doing the hiring.
Nah, that was fair.
When the Mariners named him, he was a longtime scouting director with no GM experience. I think the question “if he’s such a good GM candidate, why isn’t he already GMing somewhere?” had to be asked. Don’t get me wrong, it turned out beautifully, but this is definitely something I don’t think people should really be beating themselves up about. I think if you had 10 other guys in their mid-50s with lots of league experience but no GM experience, there’d have been a good reason 9 of them weren’t GMs yet and it wouldn’t have worked out.
by Johnny Slick on Dec 18, 2009 3:26 PM PST up reply actions
That's how I felt after last offseason.
Jack has taken it to a whole other level that I never thought possible.
Speaking of which
Your newest #Mariners will wear: Cliff Lee (#36), Chone Figgins (#9), Milton Bradley (#15). Also, Jack Wilson will now sport #2.
by lemonverbena on Dec 18, 2009 2:25 PM PST up reply actions
15 was Matt Lawton's number
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
26
from an alphabetical point of view.
Fuck Anaheim.
by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth on Dec 18, 2009 2:51 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
95 because OMG 95
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
I used to be an atheist, and then Jack Zduriencik showed up
by Gihyou on Dec 18, 2009 2:32 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
You complete me.
You… complete… me.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Just North of Wrigley Field
I just heard it annouced on ESPN and I literally screamed "WHAT!?!?! WHAT!?!?!? HAHAHA!!!"
Even the Cliff Lee deal didn’t do that to me.
"The Brewers philosophy may have been different than the Rays, but both teams have quickly, cheaply and effectively remade themselves through scouting, player development and a keen understanding that defense matters."
I caveated the damn thing, but it holds up well.
(And hey, Cameron wanted Antonetti, and either La Cava or Antonetti would’ve been good. Not sextastically awesome, however).
Oops
You’re not going to see him come in here and build his own DiamondView database, or talk everyone’s ear off about the importance of replacement level or swinging strikes.
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
He has stressed the importance of not having swinging strikes on balls out of the zone
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Wyomingroutes.org & Washingtonhighways.org
Bavasi wounded me deeply…. it’s like we’re being rewarded for our suffering.
We deserve a little happiness.
hire tim grover
#52
Sorry
I apologize, it’s hard to keep track of the different SBN blog rules.
Thanks for the heads-up.
hire tim grover
#52
True, but unless there's an SBN blog where
subject lines are banned or chatspeak is required, you can make it easier on yourself by just observing those rules everywhere.
"Starbucks doesn’t change its logo just because it no longer serves naked mermaids in Fremont." —Librocrat
Actually, the basketball blog Pounding the Rock
is anti-subject line. While not strictly prohibited, it is somewhat frowned upon.
hire tim grover
#52
Yeah same deal at McCC and LGT.
Which I don’t get, but hey.
by Aaron Campeau on Dec 19, 2009 1:42 AM PST up reply actions
As a Ranger fan, I hate this move. I must say though, the 2010 West is shaping up to be one hell of a race
It really is - probably the most interesting in baseball, though I'm biased of course.
It’s going to be fun for many years.
The A's have done very little, but give those guys another year of maturing and holy shit
by oc on Dec 18, 2009 3:18 PM PST up reply actions
Right - their big prospects haven't developed quite as well/as fast as yours, but they're still there.
If De Los Santos is still decent, if Gio learns to keep the ball down a bit, if Cahill improves…. their offense will still suck, but still, they’re going to be an interesting team for a number of years.
Z !!!!!

angels fan in seattle
by Eyebrows on Dec 18, 2009 3:44 PM PST via mobile reply actions 9 recs
Oh god if you stare at the middle of this atrocity his eyes look really really...gross.
I will smash your face into a jelly.
Hey look I forgot to resize.
My bad.
angels fan in seattle
by Eyebrows on Dec 18, 2009 3:46 PM PST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
And mobile double posts!
I am succeeding on all levels.
angels fan in seattle
by Eyebrows on Dec 18, 2009 3:46 PM PST via mobile up reply actions
Translation:
“I love you, too”
SHOW FiFi THE MONEY!!!!
by PositivePaul on Dec 18, 2009 4:49 PM PST up reply actions
Paul, you are a genius with the camera.
Are you going to be at FanFest? I’d love to see if you could snap some photos of me and the family while we’re at Safeco.
Say it with me: Washington Capitals. Capitals.
Preserved In All His Greatness - R.I.P. The Reignman 1989 to 1997
I should be there Saturday, yeah.
SHOW FiFi THE MONEY!!!!
by PositivePaul on Dec 21, 2009 7:51 PM PST up reply actions
We will crush them and rip their feathery little wings off.
Racer X. You have to love those amarillo hops.
p.s. fuck you angels
"If they refuse, I grab the guy in the nuts and say 'I thought we had an understanding.'
By then the trade is usually done."
...and now I'm here
by CapSea on Dec 18, 2009 8:44 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I love this photo.
It’s looks like Jack seizing the POWAH!
Say it with me: Washington Capitals. Capitals.
Preserved In All His Greatness - R.I.P. The Reignman 1989 to 1997
"We tried talking to Carlos, but he couldn’t quite grasp the idea of a daily diet under 7000 calories."
"Hey, you know in 9 innings in the Venezuelan League he has 2 strikeouts and 16 hits allowed, right? God he sucks."
"Anyway, I said to Hendry, you know, Silva might be a good fit for your ballclub."
"Can’t top this huh? Hmm, we’ll see about that."
by Manzanillos Cup on Dec 18, 2009 8:02 PM PST reply actions

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