Peoria Javelinas
by lemonverbena on Oct 15, 2009 10:55 AM PDT
33 comments
Seriously! Peoria Motherfucking JAVELINAS!!
Dustin Ackley is a vicious little fucker.
Peoria Javelinas! What a great team name. What's a Javelina? A miniature spear? Nope, it's a Peccary, a nasty hippo-pig native to the desert Southwest, and Central and South America.
Peccaries are medium-sized animals, with a strong superficial resemblance to pigs. ... By rubbing the tusks together they can make a chattering noise that warns potential predators not to get too close. Peccaries, indeed, are aggressive enough in temperament that, unlike Eurasian pigs, they cannot be domesticated as they are likely to injure humans. Indeed in recent years in northwestern Bolivia near Madidi National Park there have been reports of people being seriously injured and killed by large groups of peccaries.
Hell yeah! I love this pig-like Tayassuidae! So now I can go to MLB.com, click "Minor League Shop" and find me some motherfucking Peoria Javelinas gear, right? No? What?? NO! Nothing!! Fack!!! Why the hell not? Hello, LOST REVENUE. Check out these Arizona Fall League logos:
Peoria Javelinas
Mesa Solar Sox
Surprise Rafters
Peoria Saguaros
Phoenix Desert Dogs
Scottsdale Scorpions
I like the Solar Sox logo too, and the Surprise Rafters nickname. But I really want a Javelinas cap. How do I get one?
Fuckin' Javelinas dude.
Ackley, concerned that an actual Javelina might be on his tail.
4 recs |
33 comments
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I wish that instead of "Rafters" it was "Raptors"
And the logo was some Raptors throwing a surprise party.
I would also love to have a Javelinas hat.
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Oct 15, 2009 11:14 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I assume from the logo that "Rafters" is some kind of desert wind
Formerly the Grand Canyon Rafters and the Tempe Rafters
by lemonverbena on Oct 15, 2009 11:29 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Probably referencing the Colorado River, Grand Canyon, and the rafting thereof
Nice Guys Finish Third - My semantics are a waste of time.
by pdb on Oct 15, 2009 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That's my guess
I’d still rather it said Raptors though
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Oct 15, 2009 1:22 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I like it
The Saguaros logo looks too much like the Taco Time logo.
by OlSalty on Oct 15, 2009 11:21 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
A crazy-eyed javelina staring at you is one of the first things you see upon visiting my parents' house.
by Teej on Oct 15, 2009 11:34 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
You, sir, are on fire today.
I will smash your face into a jelly.
by Phildopip on Oct 15, 2009 2:46 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
They had them last year
Seems like they discontinued them. Everybody’s out of stock. Craigslist?
by chaney on Oct 15, 2009 12:19 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Looks like they have them
right here, and for $5, too.
by Mikky on Oct 15, 2009 12:23 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Thanks
But ""New Era Adjustable", blech. Got to be fitted or Flexfit.
by lemonverbena on Oct 15, 2009 12:34 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Pretty demanding for a team that doesn't really exist for any meaningful purpose as far as merch goes
Nice Guys Finish Third - My semantics are a waste of time.
by pdb on Oct 15, 2009 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
More like "coveting" than demanding
But they are out there, just “out of stock” at every turn. The logo on the hat Ackley is wearing looks more silvery than this so maybe it was updated for this season. Or a photographic illusion caused by the dazzling Arizona sunshine.
by lemonverbena on Oct 15, 2009 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Perhaps you could find some phone number to call in Arizona
as it seems that they’re impossible to find. Though, while searching, I did find out that this wondrous creation exists…
by Mikky on Oct 15, 2009 2:14 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Man I wish I had one...
MAYBE you can go down to Peoria and MAYBE if you ask one of the players will give you one.
You got slurved!
by Slurvey on Oct 17, 2009 12:36 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I would have gone with Surprise Buttsecks.
by Vatinius on Oct 15, 2009 2:55 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Photoshop please.
My first thought was that the Surprise Rafters was the rejected name of the Cuban national team.
by hcoguy on Oct 15, 2009 10:35 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Most of him was found inside the javelina that was living in his attic.
by Teej on Oct 15, 2009 3:25 PM PDT up reply actions 3 recs
Surprise!
Rafters
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Oct 15, 2009 3:51 PM PDT up reply actions 8 recs
Stupid stuff breaking on me
I mean Surprise! He was in the Rafters
I want to poop at your house - Thingray
by tootthekazoo on Oct 15, 2009 3:52 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
The found the boy the box the attic
All them fuckers, flyin around in their contraptions and there weren’t even a boy in there! Sheeooot.
by lemonverbena on Oct 15, 2009 4:28 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I also thought it had something to do with javelins.
"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."
by Fearless Frog on Oct 16, 2009 10:29 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
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