9/15: Open Game Thread
Seattle Mariners at Kansas City Royals, Sep 15, 2008 5:10 PM PDT
I think Carlos Silva is proof that just because you like a team doesn't mean you have to root for every single one of its players to escape a clubhouse fire unharmed after it was accidentally set off by a mysterious stubbly assistant without a nametag.
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Syntax!
“without a nametag unharmed”
Come on Jeff, you can do better than that.
Danny Blanchflower Lives!
I actually have a plan to use my prior employement to help further J/M/G's cause when the new GM hire happens.
As much as I want to be encouraged by this;
I cannot help but remember your prior plans.
Ok lets recap.
Who threaten to leave a muffin on your door step than did?
Who threatened to find Jeff’s address than did (I’m so sorry jeff :( )?
Who threatened to bite Graham than did?
Who threatened to prank call Paris Hilton than did?
Who threatened to Rick Roll Willie Bloomquist on Opening Day than did?
I’m a man of my word damnit.
You didn't threaten to bite me. You just fucking bit me.
by Graham MacAree on Sep 15, 2008 6:37 PM PDT up reply actions
I found that address.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:30 PM PDT up reply actions
You had the address found for you.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:04 PM PDT to parent up reply reply actions actions 0 recs
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 7:31 PM PDT up reply actions
What does that sentence mean?
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 2:51 PM PDT reply actions
Thank you; we appreciate clarity.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 2:58 PM PDT up reply actions
nO IT WASN'T
nOR WAS IT CROMULENT.
Oops. Caps Lock was on.
I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.
They are a poor excuse for nazis.
I’d put them more on the Jehovah’s Witness level.
With muffins.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:31 PM PDT up reply actions
This says alot.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:31 PM PDT up reply actions
I think of myself more as a Strunk and White Stromtrooper
Ta very much
Danny Blanchflower Lives!
I love your sig
Also, how does Meche still have a shiny tRA+ despite a steep drop in GBs and an increase in LD%? He’s getting a few more swinging strikes, but he’s throwing more balls/walking more batters as well. He’s had a very solid season by tRA, and yet he STILL appears to be a completely different guy from year to year.
If we score more than one run there should be automatic pee tests.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:22 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Also, I don't know what DMZ is thinking
but the idea of toying with Loafie at first is the worst thing ever
They can’t be trusted.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Expectations imply prior thought and I didn't want to think about this before I had to
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 4:23 PM PDT up reply actions
Hey now.
There’s nothing wrong with MNF if you don’t bother to listen to the announcers. For those of us that are old enough, it was a massive deal back in the day.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Madden does Sunday Night now.
If it wasn't for college football I'd probably have given up on sports.
He was a short-timer compared to others on the show.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
At least he made you think.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Though that might be contrary to the intent of the NFL.
I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.
Old school, very nice.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
I'm sure there are some around here who could go more old school than that.
Back to the Howard Cosell days. I wasn’t around for those.
I remember those, but only vaguely.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Either
A) I don’t care the game
or
B) I care about the game and have to wait another day and typically miss most of it for whatever reason.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Odd scheduling is always inconvenient (like day games for the M's)
but it doesn’t mean they suck.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
What did Yuni do to lose the "ss" designation?
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Yes, but he looks like he's eating fewer krispy kreme burgers too
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Did he get the flu or something?
No way he suddenly decided to get in shape with less than a month to go in the season.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
I like this reason better.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Go back to sucking next year?
"All I’ve ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They’re sticking it to me this year for whatever reason. "
.277/.324/.316
~Juan Pierre
Pray for victories?
I fucking hate you Mariners
hey from the
wind swept town of wooster.
cant really watch this one either, but whats up
How's life out there?
My brother ships out for Rio de Janeiro in November.
If it wasn't for college football I'd probably have given up on sports.
There's no scenario
no alternate universe where we don’t sign the “best available pitcher”
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 4:44 PM PDT up reply actions
If we had traded for Johan and then had to sign him
I think that would have counted.
"Dodgers can lower their magic number with a win and a Diamondback loss."
Thanks MLB.com, you are a fountain of knowledge.
is kyle davies
the guy who got shot through the team bus a couple years ago, along with a couple other freak accidents?
That sounds right.
He was dressed up for rookie hazing and was hit in the leg by a random bullet or something?
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
TOMORROW=MORROW
Let’s all do something better with our time tonight.
PS—Fuck Carlos Silva.
I'm thinking about pulling out my D20s and rolling a character sheet.
That sounds like fun.
There's even a smaller version of the image of I could have used. But no. I did that.

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.
If Jeff isn't around for tomorrow's game to rule otherwise
I’m placing a preemptive ban for the duration of the game on any Morrow puns. Fair warning.
Actually I still really enjoy a good pun
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:01 PM PDT up reply actions
Do you screenshot every ban message you get?
That must take up a lot of memory.
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:06 PM PDT up reply actions
Only the hilarious ones
and no it takes up next to 0 memory
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:07 PM PDT up reply actions
Great.
If memory serves them right, the scouting report says this isn’t the Angels.
No wonder we lose so many games, our scouting reports are vague at best!
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Eh the scouting report never changes.
Hitters: Swing at everything
Pitchers: Establish the fastball. Then establish it again.
I think we need to etablish the fact that we should establish the fastball to make sure that it is established.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Jorge Posada petitioning to be hired on as a writer for Driveline Mechanics. Referring to Chamberlain
I think if you start him and he pitches 200 innings in one year, you’re going to lose him. He’s going to get hurt. I don’t see him as a starter," Posada said Monday
"All I’ve ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They’re sticking it to me this year for whatever reason. "
.277/.324/.316
~Juan Pierre
Is that something that Posada should say to the media? Seems incredibly stupid.
I fucking hate you Mariners
So wasn't Alex Gordon supposed to be David Wright Part II?
"All I’ve ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They’re sticking it to me this year for whatever reason. "
.277/.324/.316
~Juan Pierre
What, did he miss out on the last Krispy Kreme?
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Do we have major prospects?
I mean, who aren’t formerly homeless 18 year old francophones with a possible drug dealing past?
I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.
Yeah, our two top prospects are still teenagers.
And possible drug-dealing pasts? Is this Aumont? I don’t think I’ve heard of this.
Its gotten so bad
the Seattle Times isn’t even sending reporters to KC to cover the team, hired a free lancer instead.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
I wonder if this is permanent.
Newspapers are making huge cuts right now, but not sending a beat writer on the road? That’s just insane. I hope it’s just because they know no one cares anymore.
On the last road trip
it sounded like it was because of budget cuts at the Times.
Huge cuts at all the local papers.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
Ugh. That sucks.
My paper has laid off/bought out more than 100 people in the past two years in the newsroom alone. And like 30 more are taking buyouts in a couple of weeks.
Maybe it's beause /baker's gone insane and they won't let him out of the house
and now he has to prove his sanity… starting with today’s blurb.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 5:37 PM PDT up reply actions
I like those
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:37 PM PDT up reply actions
I never did until the left one became unreliable and now I don't think twice.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 5:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Now that I think about it
I only use the right shift key on the letters Q, A, and Z.
Honestly I've never thought about which shift key I use more.
I think it’s the left one.
I often wonder if he took down the "Eating Crow" article on his own
or if his superiors told him to remove it.
Wow. How often do you see that work?
"All I’ve ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They’re sticking it to me this year for whatever reason. "
.277/.324/.316
~Juan Pierre
The Rays are FRREEEEEEEE FALLING!
"All I’ve ever done is be Juan Pierre when I wear this jersey. They’re sticking it to me this year for whatever reason. "
.277/.324/.316
~Juan Pierre
Scott Kazmir's on my flippin fantasy team....
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 5:33 PM PDT up reply actions
Kauffman Stadium has been a nice place ever since they ripped out the turf
I’m glad they are expanding instead of demanding a new stadium.
You sure know a lot about our scoreboard.
I'm back to liking midgets too much.
I know it's tiny and gameboy colored
that and the HO scoreboard are the only things wrong with Safeco.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 5:37 PM PDT up reply actions
It's very important to get that young whippersnapper in the lineup
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Fuck Shealy and Ka'aihue (sp?)
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I wish we had Kuroda instead of Silva.
If it wasn't for college football I'd probably have given up on sports.
I was looking at that boxscore
and Godammit Willy Taveras sucks.
I think with Beltre out we can make a run.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 5:51 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Does Pittsburgh still get the third overall pick?
Or was that mess resolved?
Nor can I.
But it appears that MLB allowed the deadline to be broken, which would violate the CBA.
I usually defend Boras, but this is some dirty, dirty shit. It just reeks of him being pissed that another agent got his client (Posey) the largest bonus in the draft.
Ichiro can somehow get a walk
He can go 0- a few times and still get his 200 hits for the year.
1-2-3
I hate that I’m wasting my 20s on such bad sports teams.
I was hoping Lilly would go back to back with Z, but no....
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 5:57 PM PDT up reply actions
Oh, wow, they started a lot earlier for you.
Concert up ended past midnight.
Took the stage at 9:02
Opening act barely did anything.
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:07 PM PDT up reply actions
La Grande Illusion
We made it in time for two songs. The second was okay. Then they left.
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:09 PM PDT up reply actions
That's for the best if the opener is anything less than excellent.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:10 PM PDT up reply actions
I was happy to miss them and allow BRMC to blow my mind
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:11 PM PDT up reply actions
That's usually my feeling towards 95% of openers.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:11 PM PDT up reply actions
You try sitting through 60 minutes of the Counting Crows in blazing sun with no shade.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:12 PM PDT up reply actions
Counting Crows aren't your typical opening band.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 6:13 PM PDT up reply actions
I would have loved to have seen Sleaker Kinney those three times
but PJ has no opening bands at the Gorge for some reason
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:14 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm certainly glad our first baseman is batting cleanup
Like a first baseman should be
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I wonder how Miguel Cairo feels about this decreased amount of playing time?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Like a man who doesn't have to make meth in his basement to make a living
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:17 PM PDT up reply actions
That's a good living as long as you don't get caught and you don't use the meth
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Just take out a Worker's Comp plan
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
"You can create your very own Mariner memories"
“Because they sure as hell won’t supply any of their own”
Because we need to see more of the Mariners
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:23 PM PDT up reply actions
What?
The reason Mosaic is shit is because it eats memory and is choppier than fuck no matter what the settnig
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:24 PM PDT up reply actions
Then it's Silverlight's fault, I guess.
Because my Mosaic is much smoother than running it in Firefox.
It's swell as long as you feed doesn't cut out
(which it almost never does)
Takes up much less memory too and you can dock it.
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 6:25 PM PDT up reply actions
You mean uninstall Silverlight, right?
I should probably do that. I did it before, but then I reinstalled it for the Olympics. It was awesome for the Olympics somehow.
Remember Red's rant from a few years ago
about how the Rockies were crazy never to give Shealy a chance?
At least they'll make the playoffs regardless
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:30 PM PDT up reply actions
If it's a Boston-Anaheim ALCS
I’m not watching it, writing about it, or caring about it in the slightest.
I don't like ones I don't get.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:10 PM PDT up reply actions
Ryan Healy's reaction is my favorite.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 6:35 PM PDT up reply actions
I totally shouldn't have clicked on that
while at work.
If it wasn't for college football I'd probably have given up on sports.
Boy I can't wait for House tomorrow.
Oh hey look a leadoff double.
That was a bad hop..jumped up on him.
Not saying he isn’t terrible, but I’ll give him a pass on that bounce.
I fucking hate you Mariners
I won't because fuck him, fuck his family, and fuck his future
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:40 PM PDT up reply actions
HAHA
I know..we’ll get through this together. We really gotta open up that LL bar.
I fucking hate you Mariners
Can you imagine how depressed that place could get? And the occasional awkwardness:
BrianL “Who the fuck let the furries in!?” STAB STAB STAB
I fucking hate you Mariners
So it'd be in the fashion of off-topic threads then? That could work
I fucking hate you Mariners
Speaking of beer...
A couple of weeks ago, about ten kegs of Moose Drool were apparently rolled up to the biochemistry lab above my office in Seattle.
There was an open invitation for the people on my floor to partake.
I wonder how our offense would fair against Silva?
Probably a does not compute error
Silva would throw a 60-pitch perfect game
with 30% strikes thrown.
by Crystal for DH on Sep 15, 2008 6:51 PM PDT up reply actions
Needs more white people.
To reduce the thermal tensions.
Should've considered the immiscibility of Silva's grease before signing him
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:51 PM PDT up reply actions
All that mass is a poor conducer for heat.
Prevents team from catching fire.
This was worse than puns.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:52 PM PDT up reply actions
DeSean (spelling?) Jackson is a fucking idiot
I fucking hate you Mariners
He should be benched..cocky bastard.
I fucking hate you Mariners
Loafie might hit .300 this year.
I credit my nickname.
I want to find a .gif of when he flipped out at Riggleman
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 6:59 PM PDT up reply actions
Didn't he just kinda get bug-eyed and then kinda rolled his eyes like a teenager?
I fucking hate you Mariners
I don't know
I can’t imagine it was very animated but I’m curious
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Lefty relievers unable to do the one job given to them
You know, I heard Baltimore has a pretty good lefty closer. If only we had someone like that…
Captain Candy doesn't deserve your defense
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:05 PM PDT up reply actions
He should have been a pitcher
he could have doctored the ball with melted Reese’s
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 7:06 PM PDT up reply actions
But we need to know if he's any good...we haven't got a real good chance to see him yet.
I fucking hate you Mariners
No kidding!
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:25 PM PDT up reply actions
If Ted Lilly flirted with a no-hitter, Carlos Zambrano took it home and had disgusting angry shouty sex with it
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:24 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
If I Soria on the street I'd have you arrested
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:25 PM PDT up reply actions
Wait, so you can make puns and the rest of us can't?
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:27 PM PDT up reply actions
Wait!
It’s a trick! I got momentarily banned for saying one.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:29 PM PDT up reply actions
O. Gotcha
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:36 PM PDT up reply actions
The rest of you suck at them
except for Fogel.
So, yes.
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:28 PM PDT up reply actions
I did.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Yes, but I made that which was thought to be impossible possible.
I deserve greater recognition.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:42 PM PDT up reply actions
I WROTE IT IN THE WIKI
What more do you WANT?
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:48 PM PDT up reply actions
I just want people to like me. :(
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:50 PM PDT up reply actions
This didn't come across as hilarious as I had intended.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:50 PM PDT up reply actions
I thought it was very Humungo of you.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:51 PM PDT up reply actions
Graham got fucking pissed
When I said a LaHair pun.
He was maaaad.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:38 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm not sure you understand what that looks like.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Seeing as I've never met him, no, not really.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:39 PM PDT up reply actions
And does he look cuddly to begin with?
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:41 PM PDT up reply actions
Robert, you take that one.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:42 PM PDT up reply actions
Or that one Professor that is always good at giving you a hug when you are having the worst day ever
This is disturbing.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:44 PM PDT up reply actions
Graham always made me wish I had a little sister. >:(
by JI on Sep 15, 2008 7:44 PM PDT up reply actions
Little sisters are definately awesome,
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:45 PM PDT up reply actions
More effective if you cut out the date.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:48 PM PDT up reply actions
Did you cry?
If not, I wasn’t mad at you
by Graham MacAree on Sep 15, 2008 7:58 PM PDT up reply actions
Never?
That’s something.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:38 PM PDT up reply actions
I read sometimes read these GT so fast I miss the really good ones.
The comments following make me go back and catch it. I’m busy during the games and often have to zip through the comments.
"Sorry I hit you in the helmet Hank, I meant to hit you in the neck." Stan Williams to Hank Aaron.
That made me laugh so hard I spit my entire dinner into my lap.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:25 PM PDT up reply actions
You have a large mouth or small dinners
by Jeff Sullivan on Sep 15, 2008 7:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Both.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:27 PM PDT up reply actions
When I hit a comment that makes me do that, I have to rec it.
Unless I’m having a good day and everything is making me laugh, then I self impose a limit. I often wonder what other peoples criteria are for rec’ing.
"Sorry I hit you in the helmet Hank, I meant to hit you in the neck." Stan Williams to Hank Aaron.
I've locked in a gym membership at 24 Hour that starts on April 1st.
Need something to do with all my extra time next year.
KLSAJEGH:WEGEOGQHO
FUCK YOU KRUEGER NO NON ONO NO NON YOU DO NOT MARCH THROUGH LINEUP SEVERLA TIMES WITH JUST FASTBALL AOIEHTOEWUGOEUWHGE
I could practically feel the spittle on my face from your invective.
"Sorry I hit you in the helmet Hank, I meant to hit you in the neck." Stan Williams to Hank Aaron.
Food with beer.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 7:45 PM PDT up reply actions
For Matthew.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:40 PM PDT up reply actions
But then he might not make posts like that one.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:43 PM PDT up reply actions
Psh.
I'll shut up lest you ban me like you banned butthol.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Sep 15, 2008 8:49 PM PDT up reply actions
I like how Riggleman pulled Silva at 5 1/3.
Preserve that quality start! Pump up his value!!
"Sorry I hit you in the helmet Hank, I meant to hit you in the neck." Stan Williams to Hank Aaron.
Don;t we wish.
We should have dealt him when he was 3-1 with a shiny ERA (not that that matters).
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 7:48 PM PDT up reply actions
I always thought it was 5 1/3? That would be the 1st out of the 6th inning, no?
Or is 5 1/3 just the qualifier for the win?
"Sorry I hit you in the helmet Hank, I meant to hit you in the neck." Stan Williams to Hank Aaron.
Apparently that's where Wlad lives.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Everyone on his friend list aside from LLers and Felix are hos.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Sep 15, 2008 8:23 PM PDT up reply actions
Don't talk about Felix that way
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
They have MySpace???
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 8:32 PM PDT up reply actions
Sorry, terrible sarcasm.
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Sep 15, 2008 8:32 PM PDT up reply actions

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