8/17: Open Game Thread
Seattle Mariners at Minnesota Twins, Aug 17, 2008 11:10 AM PDT
For as long as he's been floating around, it's hard to believe ol' Big Nose only turns 23 this week. He still has a chance to become an actual Major League pitcher, which is easy to forget when his name seldom comes up in conversation. Now if only he could find some more talent. Then we'd really have something special on our hands.
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Whenever Feierabend pitches, it makes me want a liter of Spaten Pils.
and pretzels with two kinds of mustard.
He sucked so hard last year. He is a true Mariner fifth starter.
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
by EnglishMariner on Aug 17, 2008 10:33 AM PDT reply actions
CoolStandings.com odds:
Rays: 57.7% division, 32% WC
RSox: 40.5% division, 43.8% WC
Yankees: 1.4% division, 5.1% WC
Twins: 51.9% division, 7.6% WC
WSox: 47.3% divison, 8.6% WC
This is one special lineup.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 10:53 AM PDT reply actions
Or short bus.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:07 AM PDT up reply actions
You know, I don't think that it would be a bad thing at all if Ibanez did accept arbitration
Not that he will.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:14 AM PDT reply actions
He'd make a damn good DH on a 1 year deal.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:16 AM PDT up reply actions
And plus I think it'd be funny to see all those .gifs used in an arbitration hearing.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:17 AM PDT up reply actions
Wait, are the two of you disagreeing?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:18 AM PDT up reply actions
I have to get a look at other cheap DH possibilities
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:20 AM PDT up reply actions
He's a bit pricier, but his bat is still genuinely good.
Although I imagine he’ll collapse against lefties next year.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:21 AM PDT up reply actions
If Ibañez will get ~$10mil to DH/4th OF next year
Why is Aubrey Huff’s contract so bad? Isn’t it relatively close? And he’s got a 900+ OPS this year.
the other angels fan
I can't imagine him getting $10M in arb.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:25 AM PDT up reply actions
Isn't he under contract for $9 mil next year
People were saying that’s why nobody grabbed him on waivers.
the other angels fan
It's not great for the $8-9m it would cost
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions
The chances of Branyan putting up a Raul line is << the chance of Raul putting up a Raul line
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:29 AM PDT up reply actions
I'm not sure that's true
and I’m definitely not sure it’s $7-8m true.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions
Sure, I'm not saying it's optimal
It just wouldn’t be the end of the world.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:33 AM PDT up reply actions
Indeed
but I’d obviously much rather have ~Branyan + 2 picks.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:36 AM PDT up reply actions
Which means that the Mariners will definitely keep Ibanez
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
And here we go.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:19 AM PDT reply actions
Let's make the games four innings, shall we?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:24 AM PDT reply actions
Ryan is fooling nobody
This is off to a swimmingly good start!
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
It's beginning to dawn on me why people always neglect to include Feierabend in discussions about the future
I love this team.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:27 AM PDT reply actions
I feel the same. I'm sitting here on my couch laughing,
and I’ve only been awake for about 30 minutes. Bless this team.
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:29 AM PDT up reply actions
He failed this audition already.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:29 AM PDT reply actions
Not enough to say.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
Sheep
.
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
Black.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions
Not racist there.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions
Club of Blacks
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions
/thatsracist.gif
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions
This nonbolded thing looks funny.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions
Feierabend is one of those guys who will have a nice two season run as somebody's minor league free agent in like 8 years
right now he’s crap
Determined, Jonesing Commentor
"You gotta love these guys!"
Isn’t Ken Cloude still kicking around the Indy leagues? Lets give him a cup of coffee.
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
Feierabend has topped out at a mesmerizing 87mph so far
This game only makes it all the more difficult to figure out why Campillo is doing what he’s doing.
At least he wears his socks the right way
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions
That's the damn truth
Deanna represent
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions
Lovely
Even the routine ground balls are basically stung line drives the just happen to be on the ground right at an infielder.
Whaaaaaaaaa?
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:38 AM PDT up reply actions
Places like LL and USSM will forever be in the minority
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:39 AM PDT up reply actions
The less intelligent I am compared to the majority, the lower my chances of driving an Aston Martin in the near future
So I guess I’m cool with it.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:51 AM PDT up reply actions
Better to steal an Aston Martin for a day than work for one for life
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:53 AM PDT up reply actions
I tried that on GTA; people shoot me.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:55 AM PDT up reply actions
Besides isn't the whole point of an Aston Martin to have more excitement in your life?
Hard to be more exciting than getting shot at.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions
While in an Exotic Luxury Sportscar
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 12:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Sure, a friend.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:43 PM PDT up reply actions
I like how you show up just to make insults.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions
And locking his keys in the car.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions
No, and if a comment of yours ever mentions a car again you're going in the box for a long time.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions
Abuse of power.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions
Try mean.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Beat me to it.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions
Tory appears to be a slur against the Irish
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions
That works too
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions
I have better things to do with my time then research pohm slang
apparently you don’t
Determined, Jonesing Commentor
I have better things to do with my time then research pohm slang
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:17 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
That wouldn't be insulting towards Brits then, would it?
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 12:18 PM PDT up reply actions
It's weird Aussie irony
but the Aussies think it’s insulting to Brits
Determined, Jonesing Commentor
Try mean and clever.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions
At least I encouraged some funny in this thread.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:18 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm ok being part of that minority
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:42 AM PDT up reply actions
Well, now that Willie's down, they can't
rightly spend any time arguing for his having a full-time spot
in the lineup, so you need something to do.
by lyleleander on Aug 17, 2008 11:39 AM PDT up reply actions
There are Mariner fans out there who drink paint thinner to lose weight too.
by R.J. Anderson on Aug 17, 2008 11:39 AM PDT up reply actions
We only drink coffee and commit suicide
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:40 AM PDT up reply actions
In the rain underneath a pyroclastic cloud
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:40 AM PDT up reply actions
In Canada
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:41 AM PDT up reply actions
It's how I start every day
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:41 AM PDT up reply actions
Somebody named "Paint"?
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:40 AM PDT up reply actions
Well, I think it's time to switch to my Xbox
Because this is niether fun nor exciting. I’m gonna play Braid, I think
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
Hey, that was different.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:38 AM PDT reply actions
That wasn't
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:39 AM PDT up reply actions
I didn't have my hopes up.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:39 AM PDT up reply actions
How could you?
You know what you got yourself into with these guys, as did all of us
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions
Morse!
Branyan’s middle name is “Oles”. That’s weird.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:44 AM PDT up reply actions
Yet fun.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions
The question mark makes that comment.
It’s goes from being dangerously close to a foolish statement, to a silly, hopeful question
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:44 AM PDT up reply actions
But he picked up Boonie's Bat Flip...
Doom impending in 5..4..3…
My layout.spellcheckDefault goes to 11
by PositivePaul on Aug 17, 2008 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions
I always loved the bat flip, even when he sucked
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions
It's nice to see your optimistic side.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:42 AM PDT up reply actions
Pretty soon they'll just be long fly balls
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:44 AM PDT up reply actions
Two outs at once?
It’s a goddamn miracle
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:43 AM PDT reply actions
It doesn't get any better than this
The M’s are beginning to remind of that classic slogan.

"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
I thought you were keeping track.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:44 AM PDT up reply actions
I would have been, but my calculator broke
HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)
by tootthekazoo on Aug 17, 2008 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions
I decided that paying attention was a bad idea
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions
This is a good plan.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions
Only four
but there were also three other doubles.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 11:47 AM PDT up reply actions
So apparently Wilkerson had a triple just now
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:44 AM PDT reply actions
Is it a bad thing when you line a ball off the
pitcher’s knee and the trainer doesn’t even come out?
Adam Everett just got a double.
ADAM EVERETT
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 11:59 AM PDT reply actions
This feels a little like that Feierabend start against Boston last year
only this one’s taking place in a normal ballpark.
Adam Everett also has a double.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 12:11 PM PDT up reply actions
Are you back?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:12 PM PDT up reply actions
Hope it was fun.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions
Glacier National Park is the most amazing place I've ever been.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions
Montana is definitely on my list of states to see.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:20 PM PDT up reply actions
The radio just let me know, but thanks.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:11 PM PDT up reply actions
It would be great if I were independently wealthy, too.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions
You know that a certain US Olympian is better than 3/5ths of our current rotation?
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions
That's not really fair
He’s better than 3/5ths of Major League starters.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Be a lot easier to sign if Washburn were gone.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 12:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Goodness gracious.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:34 PM PDT reply actions
Remember when Frank Robinson broke down after some team ran wild on Matt LeCroy?
I wonder how he’d respond to this inning.
AHAHAHAHA! I HATE THE MARINERS!
AHAHAHAHA! I HATE KENJI JOHJIMA!
AHAHAHAHA! I HATE THE MARINERS!
AHAHAHAHA! I HATE KENJI JOHJIMA!
AHAHAHAHA! I’VE FINALLY BROKEN. I’VE FLIPPED MY FUCKIN’ BEAN! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE! AHAHAHAHAHA!
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I didn't pass or fail the bar so much as got my noggin conked by it.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Momentary insanity is more frightening than the sustainable kind
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:39 PM PDT up reply actions
WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE GET THESE TINY WILLIE BLOOMQUIST ROBOT-ELVES OFF OF MY FACE???
MY SKIN IS MELTING.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
AAAAIIIGH IT BURNS IT BURNS.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
What a strange set of .gifs to collect.
Our TV guys blinking.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
One of Rizzs and one of his rug
Both are individual life forms living symbiotically
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
This one is weird
how at the start Blowers suddenly jerks back to the right of the gif
The Jose Lopez Watch - 147 H, 17 BB, 39 G Left
by seattlebruin on Aug 18, 2008 8:19 AM PDT up reply actions
Actually, this soothes me.
He always makes me feel better.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Hypnotic.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:45 PM PDT up reply actions
Sorry, I just need to get that out.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Actually - my psychotic break notwithstanding - it is pretty funny in a dark, dark way.
What pisses me off the most is that I’m going to see Tropic Thunder with my girlfriend tonight right when the Rays game is beginning, and will be without internet afterwards. Right now the Rays are my only meager baseball consolation.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
It's always great when your favorite baseball team(s) make you wonder why you ever liked this sport in the first place
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions
Exactly.
In between the M’s failing to dump Washburn and the Nats failing to sign Crow, and the continued legendary fail of both teams, I’m wondering why I couldn’t have gotten into football or basketball instead.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
.

Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Hockey is for people with male pattern baldness.
Who’s singing that song at the beginning? Sounds like Dave Matthews.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Hockey is for people who fetishize bizarre Canadian rituals.
I consider the entire country to be an informal annex of the US.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Canadians live better lives than we do
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
w/r/t beer I agree. w/r/t everything else, including free speech and health care, I disagree.
But oh shit NO POLITICS and let’s close this subthread right here and leave it at that.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Bear in mind that the only things I care about in life are hockey, beer, and women, and Canada is better at two of them
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:57 PM PDT up reply actions
If you've ever spent any time vacationing in Montreal as a single man (as I have), that could actually be three.
WOOO PARTY CITY.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Get LL to pay for your flight up here.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:02 PM PDT up reply actions
I thought that was what the fee was for
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Barely able to cover the cost of the room
We should’ve charged more.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:04 PM PDT up reply actions
We need to do something more exciting than a Q&A with snacks
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:05 PM PDT up reply actions
Which group is this?
If it’s Rush, I will somehow find a way to ban you even though that’s impossible in every way I can think of.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Someone's not paying attention to every comment.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:02 PM PDT up reply actions
Honey, I walked in late.
Hook me up with the backstory.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
BRMC or Black Rebel Motorcycle Club.
Another thing that the three guys who agree on everything agree upon. Except Jeff can’t go to the show in Seattle and so Graham is taunting him, which you will see above.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:06 PM PDT up reply actions
I fear the offseason will be worse though.
by Mariner John on Aug 17, 2008 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions
M's offseason FA contracts/trade moves:
C: Paul LoDuca
LF: Adam Dunn (6 yrs/$80 million)
SS: Miguel Tejada (traded to Astros for Morrow and RRS)
DH: Ibanez (3 yrs/$30 million)
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Mom sends a text just to say pitching sucks.
Yes, good job Mom.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:42 PM PDT reply actions
Sigh

"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaydrian.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:48 PM PDT reply actions
Apparently they just needed to wake up.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:51 PM PDT reply actions
I hope Jeff does a Top 50 worst Mariner moments this off season.
And that Matt/Graham use their wizardry to work out, to the nearest hour, exactly when the M’s lowest point of the season was.
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
by EnglishMariner on Aug 17, 2008 12:54 PM PDT reply actions
I don't think I ever felt worse than I did when Hunter robbed that home run
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions
Yes, that was also bad
Hunter felt worse.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions
Who is Halmition?
I can’t find him when I search B-Ref. Has he been sent down to the minors since then?
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Holy hell.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:54 PM PDT reply actions
Uhh...what is going on?
I fucking hate you Mariners
I have to admit, this uncharacteristic homer barrage is impressive.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Well done, NP
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 12:57 PM PDT reply actions
Morneau pushed the game out of reach.
Clearly MVP material.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Ironically enough, he's putting up a better performance than his "MVP" (note scare quotes) campaign.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Lopez hasn't been himself since the benching.
Rigglepuke shattered the confidence of a young man who can’t afford it.
Rauuuuuul
can’t get it!
More adventures in LF
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
That made me grin.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I read that as 'warning' and it still fit.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Strangly, so did I.
I was at Shea for the Felix-Slam!
Personal M's record: 5-4.
by EnglishMariner on Aug 17, 2008 1:10 PM PDT up reply actions
I think everyone did.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:11 PM PDT up reply actions
I did the exact same thing. In fact, I believe that your interpretation is the proper usage.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
We need to fight this occurence as much as we fight global warming.
I fucking hate you Mariners
Key difference: global warming is at least somewhat disputed.
Nobody disputes the terrifying consequences of Batista warming.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I'm not saying that those disputes are justified, just they're out there.
Whereas, can you name a single person on the planet who doesn’t weep in terror at the prospect of Tits coming into a game right now?
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Opposing managers don't count.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Has he been up to more exploits recently?
I missed the place where he endorsed Tits.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I see no reason to let him out.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Lanterman has also been boxed for two weeks
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions
What was his offense?
I have trouble keeping track.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Why are you asking Jeff?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions
His mom.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:17 PM PDT up reply actions
The point is that conversation openings like this are bad
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Fair enough. Let's STC right here.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
His girlfriend?
My layout.spellcheckDefault goes to 11
by PositivePaul on Aug 18, 2008 10:26 AM PDT up reply actions
Just stoping in to say
I’ve been watching the game on MLBtv, and I really don’t mind the Twins broadcasting crew, they actually seem to know a little about what their talking about, and aren’t saying as much stupid shit as I usually hear
by mariners124m on Aug 17, 2008 1:11 PM PDT reply actions
What program do you use for these?
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
You can positively SENSE the pride emanating off of that play.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Love the frustration from Rick: Can't anyone here throw a strike?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:12 PM PDT reply actions
Casey Stengel, as manager of the '62 Mets: "Can't anybody here play this game?"
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Even more appropriate.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:14 PM PDT up reply actions
I can't believe this site got more traffic in July than in April
What the hell is wrong with you guys?
I think it's probably driven by me alone.
I thrive on the catastrophic failure of my favorite teams.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
We have all this faith that your writing will make the season bearable.
No pressure.
I fucking hate you Mariners
We enjoy the agony.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions
LOOK OUT LOOK OUT IT'S THE MARINER TRAIN
WOOOOO
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:20 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I think it's not a train, it's really a yacht.
A leaky yacht.
And the noise it makes is “TOOT TOOT!”
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Well, it's baleful *TOOT*
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
If only they'd DH this motherfucker he'd be incredibly valuable.
I fucking hate you Mariners
Yes
for then the runs he brings in with his bat would not be offset by the runs he lets in with his leaden glove
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
4 for 4. Nice Raul.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:25 PM PDT reply actions
Raul is being selfish
he should have just moved the runners along
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
Damnit FSN..No POLITICS!!
I fucking hate you Mariners
Don't underestimate his powers
Where there’s a Miguel there’s a way!
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
I can totally see it happening.
Scoreless inning + five run rally + stupid decision to bring him next inning = loss.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Smallest consolation: Jesus catfucking Christ are the Red Sox ever getting spanked.
Screw you, Josh Beckett.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Speaking of Beckett, this is weird
Gameday’s data source has his LD% as 18.2%
BIS has his LD% as 24.6%
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:39 PM PDT up reply actions
That's a fairly significant difference.
Wonder what’s going on?
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
One may be all LD and the other may be those not caught?
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
The GB% is the same (40.6% vs. 39.8%)
FB’s and LD’s are getting confused.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:42 PM PDT up reply actions
I'd have to figure out a new better name for my HITf/x pitching stat :(
bRA? badass Run Average?
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:44 PM PDT up reply actions
And this, more than any other respectable reason is the sad truth about why...
…some stats just don’t take off.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
At least tremendous Run Average is a great name for a statistic*
*Not tRA’s actual expansion.
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions
C'mon Graham, we can think of a better modifier than "tremendous."
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Oscar Wilde takes offense to this statement.

"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
If somebody would ACTUALLY explain to me how to shrink image sizes (as in WHERE to insert the key phrase in the link) I would happily do so.
As it is, I am pathetically bad at HTML.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
After the img src, put 'width=200' inside the tag
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:56 PM PDT up reply actions
Look at the HTML after you insert a picture
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions
I just tried it here and failed.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
[img src="whatever" width=whatever]
Except with < not [
by Graham MacAree on Aug 17, 2008 1:58 PM PDT up reply actions
Big difference for Miguel Batista as well
Based on a few people I’ve looked at, BIS has a significantly stricter definition of what counts as a line drive.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:45 PM PDT up reply actions
Damn..Cairo threw a fastball to Jose..nice recovery though.
I fucking hate you Mariners
They'll still bench him.
I fucking hate you Mariners
Wait, what? LaHair?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:46 PM PDT reply actions
He listened.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions
If Yuni draws a walk...
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT HAPPENED
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Four straight, too!
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
When somebody walks on four straight pitches I'm much more inclined to blame it all on the pitcher
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 1:49 PM PDT up reply actions
Yeah, except I'm looking at Gameday and seeing at least two pitches that Yuni would normally hack at.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Whoa!
Looking outside to check for raining toads
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
"Mulder, toads just fell from the sky."
[/X-files dork]
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
This possibility of winning is toying with my head.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:51 PM PDT reply actions
Never mind then.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:52 PM PDT up reply actions
C'MON GUYZ LET'S GET TITS THE LOSS HERE!
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Ichiro giving away an out=good, Cairo giving away an out=bad?
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 1:53 PM PDT up reply actions
Oh.
I’m trying to pay attention, but clearly it’s not going all that well.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 1:54 PM PDT up reply actions
Raul Ibanez three run homer? To put Tits in line for the loss?
Make it happen.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Two Miguels are better than one
Ahhhhh the bottomless depth on our bench
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
Five for Five?!?
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 1:56 PM PDT reply actions
I want a lead to blow here.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Trade Trade Trade
I fucking hate you Mariners
That's it, Adrian, I'm giving my shirt back.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:01 PM PDT reply actions
Sorry ac...Adrian hurt me.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:04 PM PDT up reply actions
Joe Nathan is pretty damn good.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 2:10 PM PDT up reply actions
AJ Pierzynski is laughing somewhere off in the darkness.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Somewhere Red is crying inconsolably
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
Red doesn't cry
Water tries to escape.
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 2:03 PM PDT up reply actions
WHY LOSING IS A GOOD THING (other than he who must not be named)
Both the Sox and the Twins are 1.5 out of the WC lead behind Boston. Both are winning today while the Sox are getting crushed. If they both hold on and Boston loses, they’re only .5 games up in the WC. Which means The Impossible Dream (both Sox and Yanks out of playoffs) is one step closer to reality.
Think positive, my friends.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
You seem to have recovered remarkably well from your earlier outburst
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 2:06 PM PDT up reply actions
You can't root for the teams I do without having a remarkably resilient personality.
I usually let it roll off my back, but every now and then it just builds up.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I'm hoping they would toss themselves off the highest buildings in Beijing a la the promise of the Chinese Olympics gymnastics coach.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
A Rays/Marlins World Series would amuse me
by Jeff Sullivan on Aug 17, 2008 2:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Rays/Brewers would be ideal in terms of two teams I could actually be happy with winning.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
I love this idea, but it gives Fox night terrors.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Aug 17, 2008 2:16 PM PDT up reply actions
Tallest building in Beijing, my friend.
Tallest building in Beijing.
There is only one honorable way out.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Well you have to give them their due for being remarkably tough plate presences.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
This game is just a giggle.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:12 PM PDT reply actions
Watching JJ struggle is like a child watching a man in a Santa suit do lines off the small of a prostitute's back
For purposes of this example, imagine that it's a Thai tranny prostitute.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
So J.J. is back to full on sucking now, I guess?
Great.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Potential tying run...in LaHair.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:25 PM PDT reply actions
or potential game ending GIDP
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
C'mon Jeffie, do something.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:29 PM PDT reply actions
Eh, it was borderline
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
LET him have his emotion.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:29 PM PDT up reply actions
This is not what I meant by do something...
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:30 PM PDT reply actions
Something! Something!
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:31 PM PDT reply actions
....AAAAAND the game improbably limps onwards.
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Such tittilation!
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
That was undramatic.
Finally, some recognition.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Aug 17, 2008 2:32 PM PDT up reply actions
Not with a bang, but with a whimper
"Maybe Chief has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall."
Damn!
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.
A moral victory
They showed grit, pride, heart, desire, 110% effort, determination, insert cliches and platitudes…….
Bloomquistism
"When I'm a evaluating a player the first three things I look at are: Character, character, and character."
-Charles Armstrong esq.

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