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7/19: Open Game Thread

Cleveland Indians at Seattle Mariners, Jul 19, 2008 12:55 PM PDT





W-L G GS CG SHO SV BS IP H R ER HR BB K ERA WHIP
2008 - Miguel Batista 4-10 23 15 0 0 1 2 76.2 92 61 53 11 53 49 6.22 1.89


W-L G GS CG SHO SV BS IP H R ER HR BB K ERA WHIP
2008 - Jeremy Sowers 0-5 9 9 0 0 0 0 44.1 66 39 37 10 19 26 7.51 1.92


Rather than acknowledging Miguel Batista any more than I already am with this sentence, I'm just going to point out that, over his last six starts, Felix has allowed nine line drives. Nine. That's under ten percent. Over the same span he's struck out 40 batters against a measly nine walks. The man has been pitching just about as well as he ever has in his career.

I love you, Felix.

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Oh boy...80's day.

I don’t mind the uniforms or idea of throwbacks so much as I mind all the damn people who show up just to show off their 80s gear. Booooo

Yesterday's Pants
A blog-thingy about the Mariners and stuff.

by BrettJMiller on Jul 19, 2008 11:39 AM PDT reply actions  

As a side note to that,

I think all throwback days should be televised. Especially when Tits is pitching, because then at least something entertaining can be seen.

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 12:48 PM PDT up reply actions  

I really don't understand anything about the thought process of this club.

If they can’t hit lefties so you sit Lahair and Clement yesterday, what has changed that conclusion for today?

I fucking hate you Mariners

by kentroyals5 on Jul 19, 2008 12:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

It was mentioned in the media

that with 4 LHP in a row Riggleman was going to play some lefties against lefties to avoid having guys sit for over a week, when you count the ASB.

by eponymous_coward on Jul 19, 2008 12:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

Bloomquist with more OBP isn't completely crazy batting second.

Theoretically, high obp/high speed in the order isn’t awful (though Bloomquist is still pretty terrible, on any decent team he bats ninth on alternate Tuesdays as a 25th man).

It’s playing Vidro or Cairo AT ALL that’s mind-bogglingly dumb.

by eponymous_coward on Jul 19, 2008 1:03 PM PDT up reply actions  

I was going to go to this game.

Then I realized it’s kind of hard to do that when someone slashes the tires on your car.

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 12:13 PM PDT reply actions  

Seriously?

Live in a bad neighborhood?

by LantermanC on Jul 19, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Did they take anything?

What’s the point in slashing tires or keying a car?
Doesn’t make any sense to me.

by LantermanC on Jul 19, 2008 12:22 PM PDT up reply actions  

That's what gets me.

All they did was slash my tires. At least make the vandalism worth while you twats.

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 12:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

The joke goes:

I left 4 Mariner tickets in the front seat of my car. I came back, my window was broken, my car radio was gone, and I had 8 Mariner tickets in the front seat of my car…

by eponymous_coward on Jul 19, 2008 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Hahaha

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

You can find the same quality at Walmart and it's cheaper

If you’re going to shop at a shit store you may as well spend less.

by marinator on Jul 19, 2008 1:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

And get Ebola

The Walmart in Renton is like a third world street market. Bad news

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

The ones in Puyallup and Spanaway aren't bad

There are actually a lot of lookers that shop there.

by marinator on Jul 19, 2008 1:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

The closest Wal-Mart is 45 minutes away

and I would rather have my nuts in a vise than ever shop at a Wal-Mart.

Also, there’s no reason to have yet another Wal-Mart is good/bad discussion. It’s just not an option for me.

by Aaron Campeau on Jul 19, 2008 1:19 PM PDT up reply actions  

Slashed tires?

I already crashed on Wednesday.

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions  

loldumb

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions  

It could be worse...

I’m at work, and since it’s kinda slow here I’m voluntarily sitting through this instead of generating some business

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions  

Baaaaaby Beluuuuuuuuga

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:09 PM PDT reply actions  

I bet 50 bucks the M's would lose today.

The site actually favored the Indians! Easiest bet I’ve ever made.

Reverse jinx now because my luck goes like that right?

by Limerickx on Jul 19, 2008 1:10 PM PDT reply actions  

That's usually how it works for me in Vegas

I finally gave up and bet wins and losses over the season.

by eponymous_coward on Jul 19, 2008 1:11 PM PDT up reply actions  

It's a good thing Tits is feeling better

Because I shudder to think what the score would be if he was playing hurt

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:10 PM PDT reply actions  

K MACHINE

HE LITERALLY INVENTED THE STRIKEOUT

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:11 PM PDT reply actions  

One and a half more years of this shit?

I’m sure the Mariners could find a more productive place for Batista. Like the guy who sorts and washes jockstraps.

by marinator on Jul 19, 2008 1:12 PM PDT reply actions  

So I heard bad things about yesterday's game thread

We may have some retroactive punishments coming up. I haven’t read it yet.

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 1:12 PM PDT reply actions  

See, I totally missed all this.

Good.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:24 PM PDT up reply actions  

My favorite M’s player? Scott Spiezio.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 18, 2008 7:22 PM PDT to parent up reply reply actions actions 0 recs

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 1:26 PM PDT up reply actions  

Yeah, I just confessed below.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:27 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'll save you some time

I said you, Matt, and Graham were doody heads.

I said stats are for fags.

I said tRA is for people who do not understand the true value of ERA.

Of course this was all in good fun.

by marinator on Jul 19, 2008 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions  

I seem to recall saying something nice about Player A and poutine.

I’m deeply, deeply ashamed of both.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:26 PM PDT up reply actions  

Yeah, that might actually have been worse.

I do also recall some limeybaiting on my part. But then that’s obviously borne of jealousy. Damn Brits with their sexually irresistible accents. I hate watching them romp through coeds.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:35 PM PDT up reply actions  

HOLY SHIT that's awesome.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:17 PM PDT up reply actions  

I REITERATE: that is the funniest error I have seen all season.

My god, Manny is falling apart.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

I like how he acts like he has ants in his pants after he rolls on top of the baseball

And holy fuck I just wrote “as he rolls on top of the baseball” while speaking about a Professional Major League Baseball Player…

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:19 PM PDT up reply actions  

Oh Jesus.

TURN THE AUDIO OFF I DON’T WANT RIZZS

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 1:17 PM PDT reply actions  

Awww shit

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions  

Cluch play there, Duke Adequate.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions  

Confused....

Any reason FOX is showing the stinking Red Sox Angels game? I was planning on taking in the Batista collapse all afternoon today and can’t find the game on Seattle Comcast…...? Am I doing something wrong? Can someone help me?

by JDubs on Jul 19, 2008 1:26 PM PDT reply actions  

Even Tits can strike out Andy Marte

Has any super-prospect in recent memory fizzled so badly?

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:29 PM PDT up reply actions  

No, I think 1990's too long ago. Almost 20 years at this point.

I was mentally drawing the cutoff at somewhere around 1998 or so.

But Rivera stealing Jeter’s glove and selling it was definitely an awesomely low nadir. And that did happen pretty recently. 2002 or something, right?

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:32 PM PDT up reply actions  

I just checked out wikipedia. My god I would love to see this baserunning error they're talking about.

I’m gonna check to see if it’s in MLB’s archives.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:33 PM PDT up reply actions  

Dammit, it's not on the Giants' site.

In the news section there’s an article about it saying it’s destined to be memorialized on videotape forever…AND THERE’S NO FREAKIN’ VIDEO.

Such injustice.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:42 PM PDT up reply actions  

saved.

"Holy Shit, It's Steve Perry lead singer of Journey". "ha, FORMER Lead Singer."

by RafaelCarmona22 on Jul 19, 2008 1:40 PM PDT up reply actions  

Q: ARE WE NOT HUNGRY?

A: WE ARE TURBO.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:40 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Do you realize that one of the members of Devo co-wrote Neil Young's "Hey Hey, My My (Into The Black)"?

The odd thing is, the guy (Blackburn) isn’t given credit for co-writing the first half of the bookend, “My My, Hey Hey (Out Of The Blue).” So I guess he just helped with the lyrics to the rockin’ version. Great song either way.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:45 PM PDT up reply actions  

Jeffie!

Fuck you, Vidro. Fatass.

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 1:41 PM PDT reply actions  

Whatever.

Go back to shelling Tits, please.

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 1:45 PM PDT reply actions  

Yes he did.

Does that warrant a penalty boxing of 24 hours?

by BrianL on Jul 19, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

Do tell

And I wasn’t smashed to 3.5 beers.

by Robert on Jul 19, 2008 2:14 PM PDT up reply actions  

If you count slang

I only spelled Ms Jeff wrong.

by Robert on Jul 19, 2008 2:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

So those are all not her name

Process of elimination will give us her name eventually

by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on Jul 19, 2008 2:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

This is a great deal.

Recs for me, frustration for Robert.

by Teej on Jul 19, 2008 3:28 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Great call Rizzs

Really made your boy sound terrific.

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 1:54 PM PDT reply actions  

Wow, so was I the only person who kinda-sorta expected a better result from Batista today?

I dunno, just figured he might pull a respectable game out of his ass against one of the weaker offenses in the league. AHAHAHAHA GOD LAUGHS AT MY PUNY HOPE.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 1:58 PM PDT reply actions  

So, I think we should put up 8 runs every time Felix pitches

And then just score one run per game until he pitches again. And get shelled on the off games as well, so changes are made at the end of the year

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 2:04 PM PDT reply actions  

The Diamond Club?

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 2:08 PM PDT up reply actions  

How do you swing those seats?

Do you need to know somebody or is it just a matter of shelling out the $$$?

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 2:10 PM PDT up reply actions  

Must be nice to run one of the two primary M's blogs out there.

Lucky bastard. I haven’t even ever been able to see them in Safeco.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 2:11 PM PDT up reply actions  

So it seems EVERYBODY can strike out Andy Marte.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 2:21 PM PDT reply actions  

Any and all attempted LaHair puns will be punishable by a 24-hour penalty boxing

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 2:39 PM PDT up reply actions  

All of our runs this inning have scored on either outs or errors.

(Yeah, I’m back. Fuck it, I’m well prepared.)

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:04 PM PDT reply actions  

Where can you find the traffic numbers?

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:22 PM PDT up reply actions  

Huh. We crush Halos Heaven, and are in turn crushed by BCB and Athletics Nation.

This stirs my blood.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:27 PM PDT up reply actions  

Through the roof last July and August

And with live-updating comments now, game threads would be impossible to follow if this team ever gets good.

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 3:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

Strange thing is, I almost enjoy the game threads more now that the team is terrible.

In part that’s probably just because I know the ropes so much more these days.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:33 PM PDT up reply actions  

*than

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

“He knows he can hit,” Rodriguez said, “but he also wants people to recognize what he does on the grass.”

by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on Jul 19, 2008 3:19 PM PDT up reply actions  

This is frankly unbelievable.

It takes a lot of balls to write this article.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

On second thought, perhaps the FO is trying to pump him up in preparation for a trade.

As in “see, Ibanez isn’t as terrible a fielder as you think! Look, there was an article written about his defense just the other week!”

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions  

Doesn't count

He only had one foot on the grass when he “threw” that ball

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions  

I love that gif.

Reminds me of my throws in high school games.

by craig3410 on Jul 19, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions  

Being "on the grass"

Might explain some of his lethargic movement out there

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:20 PM PDT up reply actions  

Muahaha

I signed “Reggie Stocker” on the Show. :D

The poster formerly known as Matt.

by bluemax on Jul 19, 2008 3:15 PM PDT reply actions  

Huh
I’ll go in more depth later, but Adam Loewen is done as a pitcher. He’s going to reinvent himself as an outfielder/first baseman, perhaps as early as the fall instructional league.

Another surgery on his elbow would have sidelined him for an estimated 1 1/2 years, and he wasn’t willing to go down that path.

“I’m always going to be a pitcher,” he said. “I’ve been doing it since I was 9 years old. It’s going to be hard to let it go, but God has a plan for me.”

by Jeff Sullivan on Jul 19, 2008 3:19 PM PDT reply actions  

Fucking early games.

"Holy Shit, It's Steve Perry lead singer of Journey". "ha, FORMER Lead Singer."

by RafaelCarmona22 on Jul 19, 2008 3:40 PM PDT reply actions  

Holy shit, the Pravda has an article about Raul's "underrated" defense?

"Holy Shit, It's Steve Perry lead singer of Journey". "ha, FORMER Lead Singer."

by RafaelCarmona22 on Jul 19, 2008 3:43 PM PDT reply actions  

EVER SO LATE

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:44 PM PDT up reply actions  

Oh thats right Jim Street is a goddamned retard.

"Holy Shit, It's Steve Perry lead singer of Journey". "ha, FORMER Lead Singer."

by RafaelCarmona22 on Jul 19, 2008 3:44 PM PDT up reply actions  

Oh no our closer is pitching in a non-save situation

Apocalypse

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:43 PM PDT reply actions  

Listen closely

And you can probably hear Riggleman’s cellphone ringing, and getting blown up with texts from Johnny Mac

Wut r u doing? lol ur dum now

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:46 PM PDT up reply actions  

Morrow = throw-in on trade of Beltre for Xavier Nady.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 3:47 PM PDT up reply actions  

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:48 PM PDT up reply actions  

I concur

It’s like he’s trying to entice you with his sexy dance.

by OlSalty on Jul 19, 2008 3:56 PM PDT up reply actions  

Kinda looks like he's saying

“I’m pooping” at the first part of that

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:59 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Maybe reverse it so it just loops backwards

Like count 1-2-3-4-5-4-3-2-1 with the frames

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:58 PM PDT up reply actions  

Also, Jeff

Nothing is impossible if you just believe in yourself. You have to BELIEVE

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 4:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

Working on a beautiful Saturday afternoon totally blows

But at least it prevented me from watching this game stupidly.

by OlSalty on Jul 19, 2008 3:54 PM PDT reply actions  

2 outs so what?!

Rally time ICHIROOO

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 3:57 PM PDT reply actions  

I assume this isn't going to end well, but

1) Jeff’s face is just perfect for that.
2) Looks kind of like it’s Jeff’s hand that’s venturing alittle too far south of the battle front.

by DCMariner on Jul 19, 2008 5:06 PM PDT up reply actions  

Bottom one is better.

Facial expression goes “I got it I got it I’m the shit I got it OHFUCK” which is what makes the whole gif.

by Aaron Campeau on Jul 19, 2008 4:33 PM PDT up reply actions  

For the love of God

Can we please trade some of these jabronis while they still have value?!

by Slica on Jul 19, 2008 4:37 PM PDT reply actions  

The Rays are entertaining.

They give me my good baseball entertainment this year, while the M’s provide bad baseball hilarity. Win-Win

HA HA HA, your Grandpa's an ASS!- Tourette's Guy (R.I.P)

by tootthekazoo on Jul 19, 2008 4:57 PM PDT reply actions  

Where can I go to find stupid Red Sox fans bitching in despair?

I love the taste of self-entitlement gone sour.

I root for the two worst teams in baseball, non-ironically.

by esoteric on Jul 19, 2008 6:38 PM PDT reply actions  

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