5/7: Open Game Thread
by JeffS on May 7, 2008 5:37 PM PDT
in Seattle Mariners Game Threads
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PrintTexas Rangers at Seattle Mariners, May 7, 2008 7:10 PM PDT
I was planning to come home and talk about how already the losing has gotten to the point at which it's funny and no longer bothersome, but then I sat down, looked at my computer, and realized that I still have a lingering shred of hope tucked away somewhere in my brain that's yet to be destroyed, a shred that has thus far effectively hidden itself from the swarming hordes of crushing indifference. But I'm sure that shred will be taken care of in a timely fashion. Kind of like Anne Frank.
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What's not to like about German efficiency?
Why is Wlad batting ninth?
I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.
And by coincidence
guess the name of the next 12 shows at the INTIMAN Theatre.
The only thing I remember about that book
is her being a lesbian.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:18 PM PDT up reply actions
Come on Pittsburgh
Zito in line for the loss to go 0-7.
You know, Cy Young holds the Major League record for losses
Barry Zito is just trying to emulate him after winning his award
John Morgan sighting
Great draft recap, by the way.
Thanks.
I’m pretty wired. I might just forgo sleep and take in a Mariners game. They still have that Griffey kid? He’s a gamer.
Addendum:
Sleeping at night is for losers. Naps from 3-9 are for winners
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:05 PM PDT up reply actions
Here on the east coast I sure am
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Don't be dissing juiceboxes
They’re delicious
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Personally
I can’t get into anything Jeff Mangum does. I’ve tried but it just doesn’t work for my ear.
The poster formerly known as Matt.
I'm willing to give him a shot
I found out with Rufus Wainwright that having a good voice doesn’t mean I’ll like you, so now I’m testing the opposite.
I thought I'd like him since I like Jeff Buckley
I thought wrong.
Rufus Wainright: The Jon Garland Album
IIIIIIIIIIIIIII
I cannot
I cannot striiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike the batters ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut...
"JeffS" is still here?
I thought regular old “Jeff” would be back by now. :(
Cheeseburgers are delicious.
This team is just so frustrating.
Mariners Fans: The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over but it can’t. Not without your help. But you’re not helping.
Bavasi: WHAT DO YOU MEAN, I’M NOT HELPING?
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:01 PM PDT reply actions
Cliff Lee is defying regression.
0.82 ERA
I’m scared.
Today's fun fact
If you google image search for happy balentiens day, you get one interesting result
I think I might hate Carlos Mencia more than I hate Dane Cook
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:21 PM PDT reply actions
Dane Cook's jokes are unfunny and his delivery sucks, but Mencia only has one joke, and it's a really shitty one.
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:28 PM PDT up reply actions
I don't know which he you're talking about.
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:31 PM PDT up reply actions
You are talking about Dane Cook, right?
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:35 PM PDT up reply actions
I can't believe Coach would approve of any comedy not done by a muppet.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:36 PM PDT up reply actions
Hey know. Until Jim Henson died, The Muppets
were one of the most popular show on television!
Cheeseburgers are delicious.
Lay off the italics, commas, and exclamation points
it’ll really help you out.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:39 PM PDT up reply actions
TOS = Star Trek: The Original Series
TNG = Star Trek: The Next Generation
DS9 = Star Trek: Deep Space 9
I miss that show
I wasn’t the same after the original cast left.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:58 PM PDT up reply actions
It jumped the shark when they ran out of Japanese stock footage.
by JI on May 7, 2008 7:05 PM PDT up reply actions
If the bad guys knew their identies and could see them whereever they went
why didn’t they just shoot them while they were on the can?
by JI on May 7, 2008 7:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Remember the movie?
Oh man, when that came out, I thought that it was the greatest day in my young life.
And even at 8 years old, I realized that it was a horrible horrible movie.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
I actively hated the Power Rangers growing up
but I still had Kimberly dreams.
Damn.
On that note, this gives me another opportunity to hype the That Guy with the Glasses.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
His review of The Wizard is fantastic.
I love his rivalry with the Angry Video Game Nerd.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
I still like Yahtzee's video game reviews more
but this is good stuff.
You know there are naked pictures of her on the internet, right?
She’s naked in them.
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:18 PM PDT up reply actions
dig around with 'amy jo johnson nude' etc
just watch out for the usual array of pornovirus entangulation.
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:29 PM PDT up reply actions
To the Googlemobile!
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
Did anyone not find it a little racist?
The Black Ranger was the black kid.
The Yellow Ranger was the asian girl.
That’s no coincidence.
It's not racist, it's just color-coded to help the kids
You call the black the guy the “green ranger,” and bam, all those kids get autism.
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:33 PM PDT up reply actions
I think amongst the Asian population,
the stereotype of them being “yellow” is considered a little racist. But maybe not.
like all things in childhood
they were horribly stereotypical.
go watch a disney movie sometime. All stereotypes.
Dane Cook's under the impression that if you act hyper and crazy enough, people will laugh at anything.
Even if it’s really really unfunny.
I hate both of them
but I think I hate Dane Cook more.
Dane Cook: I DON’T REALLY HAVE ANY JOKES I’M JUST GOING TO SCREAM AND YELL AT YOU AND PASS IT OFF AS COMEDY, AM I RIGHT!?
Mencia: BEANER. DON'T BE PC. WHAT I SAID WAS FUNNY, LAUGH! BEANER. DON'T BE PC. WHAT I SAID WAS FUNNY, LAUGH! etc...
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:31 PM PDT up reply actions
Now the comedian I hate the most?
Ralphie Fucking May.
Go watch his act on the Spike Video Games Award show
the single most painful comedy act in the history of mankind.
He was literally begging for people to laugh.
All he was getting were courtesy chuckles and uncomfortable cheap laughs.
Joe Rogan was in NewsRadio
so at least he used to be funny.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Not that we aren't all aware of this already
but ESPN’s baseball schedule sucks:
May 11th: Red Sox at Twins
May 12th: Red Sox at Twins
May 18th: Mets at Yankees
May 19th: Cubs at Houston
May 25th: Angles at White Sox
May 27th: Dodgers at Cubs
June 2nd: Yankees at Twins
June 9th: Indians at Tigers
June 16th Red Sox at Phillies
June 23rd: Mariners at Mets
June 30th: Mets at Cardinals
July 7th: Twins at Red Sox
4 games without the Mets, Yankees or Red Sox from now until July.
The poster formerly known as Matt.
what about the M's fan base
are there any more depressed then us?
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
The Marlins at least get some amazing seasons from time to time
Which include something called World Series, although I don’t really know what that means
They also haven't finished in the top ten in attendance
in the National League since 1997 when they finished 5th.
Cheeseburgers are delicious.
Worst game ever.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
Eh.
ET for the Atari 2600 just barely edges it out.
Ok, worst modern game ever!
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
AAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhh!!!!!
MIGUEL FUCKING CAIRO AT FIRST TONIGHT
Cairo and Burke in the same lineup.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
Did you just contradict yourself?
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:37 PM PDT up reply actions
"At least he's not constantly yelling" - you, regarding Dane Cook.
“Who are you? Dane Cook?” – you, regarding BrianL yelling
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:42 PM PDT up reply actions
"I don't know which he you're talking about" - me
“Cook” – you
Therefore, you said, “At least Cook’s not constantly yelling.”
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 6:45 PM PDT up reply actions
So Vidro is now behind
Jaime Burke and Miguel Cairo? Ouch…..
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Celebrating
his 3 year extension to be announced tomorrow.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Do the M's front office think
Clement sucks at catching? Why Burke?
does it really matter if he's DH or Catcher
as long as he’s in the lineup?
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Im glad he is in the lineup,
but i don’t understand why Clement is catching, unless they don’t feel like he is going to be there long term
Well if they're not going to DH Raul
might as well do something to keep Vidro’s option from vesting.
So, baseball then.....
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
so we're not going to talk about the M's at all?
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
It's the Weaver in him.
Can’t escape the suck if it’s in your genes.
Muahahahahah.
Not that it matters
but the Angels are only averaging about 3.25 runs per game for him. This is really on his 4th bad start of the year. So right now he’s good 50% of the time he takes the mound or whatever.
The poster formerly known as Matt.
Heh
this reminds me of the hey day of Facebook when my friend had a normal profile and “drunk profile”.
The poster formerly known as Matt.
I was drunk ranting on facebook last night about LL being down
I never knew the status line had a character limit
Oh Good God
anyone see that autistic kid on the pre-game show?
Oh, this is good.
Now we’re making fun of mentally-handicapped children! Sheesh!
Cheeseburgers are delicious.
Did you miss the entire thread
where we made fun of the crippled Little Leaguer?
You are succeeding in being funny
for reasons other than you intended.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:59 PM PDT up reply actions
We've been maing fun of you for a while.
I’d say I was surprised you hadn’t noticed, but…
What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
Keys to the game:
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
You realize you could throw in three random phrases
and no one would know the difference.
by JI on May 7, 2008 6:58 PM PDT up reply actions
Meanwhile, somewhere on the Rangers broadcast
- Repeat performance
- Clean up defense
- They’re the Mariners!
come on Erik
make me not regret staying up even though im running on 3.5 hours sleep and have been up since 7am eastern.
yay for caffeine!
For the record:
Sarcoidosis:
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:16 PM PDT up reply actions
I fully expect to be banned for that picture.
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:16 PM PDT up reply actions
I could post more gnarly stuff
NOMA, for instance.
You don’t want that. It’s nasty stuff.
By the way, anybody know of any dentist jobs in southeastern North Carolina?
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Sometimes a big widescreen monitor is a curse.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
this is all true.
but i get to sleep in tomorrow.
the project got done.
It's proportioned well to the rest of his body
It’s not like he’s Elaine Benes.
“A bird….right into a woman’s head… like he couldn’t avoid it…”
I hate these Conservation Sensation commercials
almost as much as the Big Bob’s commercials.
that was just so miserable
i need to forget about those games. and quickly.
Oh wow, game time.
Fawn over the Pink Ranger later.
Did that pregame stat say hitters are batting .000 on pitches 61-75?
Most useless stat ever, especially this early.
He got a fastball middle-in
not a bad idea to swing
when they announce attendance is that paid attendance or
the amount of people that actually showed up?
paid
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
It's usually paid
They usually don’t advertise how few asses they have in the seats.
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:19 PM PDT up reply actions
I probably could get a seat next to Brett for like $10 bucks
but I am going on vacation tomorrow, so I don’t feel like heading out to Seattle.
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:20 PM PDT up reply actions
i dont want to face him
and i dont want to throw 4 pitches to him.
fuck it, im hitting him.
i believe thats what he said at least.
Oh god, it's Padilla.
PITCH FASTER!
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
I could only imagine a Tits vs. Padilla match up
or did that happen this year already?
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:20 PM PDT up reply actions
I HATE HIT AND RUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!
FOR MANY MANY REASONS
such as?
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
For the Iraq such as.
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:21 PM PDT up reply actions
Haha, I somehow watched a bunch of YouTube video on that last night...
after the game was over in the 3rd inning.
how much time do you have?
condensed version:
1. When the runner gets a good jump, the hitter almost always fouls off a pitch
2. That pitch is usually a ball
3. Hitters hack at terrible pitches, reducing the odds they can direct the ball where they want
4. Mac does it with sub-optimal runners
so this team
would be better served playing station to station ball?
I agree that hit and runs shouldn’t be done with everyone… but the Ichiro Lopez combination would be the one I wouldn’t complain about.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
eh... nevermind
its the Mariners….. its not worth any type of discussion.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Ichiro/Lopez is okay
unfortunately they represent the overwhelming minority of Mariner H&R attempts.
my problem with those Hit and Runs
is that often Ichiro can just straight steal at a higher success rate than a H&R
OH NOES!
We’re about to strand a leadoff walk!
SAVE US ZORDON!
Ronaldo is very interested in your music selection
and he would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:34 PM PDT up reply actions
To remind the children of what color power ranger they are.
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:27 PM PDT up reply actions
I still think that since the bad guys knew their identites
it should have been easier for them to kill those kids.
by JI on May 7, 2008 7:28 PM PDT up reply actions
I don't see why Zordon could've killed all the enemies himself
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:29 PM PDT up reply actions
He's supposed to be this all powerful thing in the tube
I think he could do something. I don’t know.
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:33 PM PDT up reply actions
From wikipedia
The series begins with five teenagers combating Rita Repulsa and her seemingly endless array of fruity monsters
... I thought my mlb.tv froze
but no, it was just Padilla’s stretch
Batista last night and now Padilla tonight.
We better be up 10-0 by the 3rd inning so I can move onto something else.
That was pretty irritating
It’s like playing your dick friend at some game and he uses every dirty trick in the book to win. He still beat you fairly, but it’s not like anyone is having any fun.
by JLC on May 7, 2008 7:29 PM PDT up reply actions
So here's something interesting
Adrian’s AVG and SLG are pretty much the same as ‘07, but his OBP is way way up, buoyed by a quite increased walk rate, of which all but one or so are non-intentional.
Don't feel bad.
LL has turned into a blog about naked celerities we like.
Upgrade!
by JI on May 7, 2008 7:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Ad revenue should increase...
...by more than just a bit, right?
How many people click the ads on here, anyway?
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
by ColbyInBoston on May 7, 2008 7:29 PM PDT up reply actions
that's not the girl (boy?)
that banged her dad is it?
by JI on May 7, 2008 7:32 PM PDT up reply actions
Instead of watching the Mariners, I just baked a coffee cake.
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 7:28 PM PDT reply actions
Tonight is Autism Awareness Night
unfortunately the autistic fans in attendance aren’t aware of it.
by JeffS on May 7, 2008 7:29 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
God, that clip of Mr. Red
falling off the back of that cart makes me laugh my ass off
affects their skrills?
i dont even know what that could be
McClaren is tired of this team as well.
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
mcclarren needs his nap
its understandable. padilla just pitched a 1/2 inning
That's a shame
McLaren’s usually good for a lot more head-bobbing.
you don't have your sound
muted? I always do thru the first 3 or 4 innings until Sims takes over.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Two mispelled words and no caps
this one’s a winner
My comment was either that one that I posted or
“BrianL is coming for you now”
oops
entered the link wong
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/blaspheme
Oh come on, that was funny.
Stop being so cliqueish :)
by miles
Dave was great and he’s got a good voice but I just can’t listen to him anymore…. his vision has failed him.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
Bedard should give the Home plate ump
the Kerwin Danley treatment next time he doesn’t get a call.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
MCLAREN HURTS THE TEAM
BY NOT GETTING THROWN OUT MORE OFTEN
by eponymous_coward on May 7, 2008 7:36 PM PDT reply actions
DID HE GET THROWN OUT
I’M NOT WATCHING THIS GAME
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:36 PM PDT up reply actions
I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT!
by eponymous_coward on May 7, 2008 7:38 PM PDT up reply actions
YOU KNOW WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT
AND YOU KNOW IT SO STOP PLAYING STUPID
I'm on gameday and I'm sorry to be a pest, but how did he get thrown out?
Arguing balls and strikes?
K Saltalalalalalalalamaccccchia!
How do they fit all the letters on his jersey?
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
I don't know what we'll do when he needs to come out of the game though.
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Not if he doesn't allow runs.
Sweet, sweet 0-0 ties.
by eponymous_coward on May 7, 2008 7:43 PM PDT up reply actions
Naw... 0 > -1
We’re penalized runs for giving Jose Vidro regular at bats
Leave Charles Barkley and Magic Johnson alone
they’re old and/or have AIDS so they can’t work out
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:38 PM PDT up reply actions
Just noticed MY is out
http://scores.espn.go.com/mlb/boxscore?gameId=280507112
HOME PLATE UMPIRE MARK WEGNER EJECTED SEATTLE MANAGER JOHN MCLAREN IN THE TOP OF THE SECOND INNING FOR ARGUING BALLS AND STRIKES
MICHAEL YOUNG LEFT THE GAME IN THE TOP OF THE FIRST INNING WITH A RIGHT SHOULDER INJURY
Have we talked about the Mercury girl?
Jill Wagner:
Some people cut themselves. I root for the Mariners.
Not if we call it "drafting"
/Bud Selig
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:42 PM PDT up reply actions
that's not what my five russian wives say
of course, they can’t speak english, so I have no idea what they’re saying.
by Matthew on May 7, 2008 7:42 PM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
Rec'd
God this is a lot more entertaining than this skoorbo of a game
They haven't told you about polygamy yet, either, have they?
Nice to see you out of your compound, Mr. Jeffs.
by eponymous_coward on May 7, 2008 7:44 PM PDT up reply actions
what does the player win for hitting the hit it here cafe?
by Fin on May 7, 2008 7:41 PM PDT up reply actions
There is risk involved
Near Misses of the Hit It Here sign release autism gas into the bleachers.
by Jordan of Boise on May 7, 2008 7:44 PM PDT up reply actions
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.
"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert
This game needs more battle royale
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 7, 2008 7:42 PM PDT reply actions
We have Ichiro, King Awesome, Felix and Bedard
And yet, we suck like they do.
:(
by eponymous_coward on May 7, 2008 7:47 PM PDT up reply actions
cracks me up on throws to first
when the runner covers his ear with his hand….. like getting hit in the hand by a throw is better…. more likely to miss time with a bruised or broken hand then getting hit in the ear.
Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!
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