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Series Preview: Texas Rangers @ Seattle Mariners

Tiny by Matthew on in Series Previews Comment 302 comments

Seattle: 13-19
Rangers:13-19

GAMES

Game 1: Jarrod Washburn* vs Kevin Millwood
Game 2: Miguel Batista vs Sidney Ponson
Game 3: Erik Bedard* vs Vicente Padilla
Game 4: Felix Hernandez vs A.J. Murray *

I'd like to be able to point out how we have a good matchup in each of these four games, with the first being the worst in terms for us, but Washburn at home isn't nearly as bad as Washburn in Texas. I'd like to be able to do that and, coming off a series win against the downtrodden Yankees, point to a good chance to go 3-1 (or better) in this series to re-establish a .500 record and gain a ton of momentum heading into a soft part of the schedule.

Instead, I now fully look forward to experiencing a new worst moment in Mariner fandom when Sidney Ponson comes in and shuts us down for 7 innings on Tuesday.

Star-divide

Likely Starters:
C Gerald Laird/Jarrod Saltalamacchia^
1 Chris Shelton
2 Ian Kinsler/German Duran
3 Ramon Vazquez
S Michael Young
L Brandon Boggs^
C Josh Hamilton*
R David Murphy*
D Milton Bradley^

Filling out this lineup based on the Rangers last few games, there were a couple people originally filled in as "? Lastname" because I had no idea who they were. And since I'm not Joe Morgan in terms of keeping tabs on baseball, that's a pretty bad sign. Boggs is a replacement for Marlon Byrd, though you might end up seeing Milton Bradley take the field and Laird and Saltalamacchia both in the lineup at DH and C respectively (what a concept).

Milton Bradley: .333/.427/.516

Ben Broussard: Benched

Josh Hamilton: Destroyer of Our Dreams

CONTEXT

I don't have much to say here. The Mariners did everything possible to make me look like a fool for trying to look on the bright side of this offense. Regardless, everything looks ugly right now and the urge to come up with some sort of psychological cliche like take it one game at a time, focus on the small things, etc is going to be hard to overcome and it's all pretty much bunk for us to speculate on since we don't have close access to these players. We cannot know if they're loafing, or pressing, or sick, or whatever. We can speculate about what sorts of moves the management should make in order to put the best team possible out on the field, but that's about the end of our analytical projecting rope.

The talent is there. Someone just needs to figure out a way for it display itself.

THIS SERIES BROUGHT TO YOU BY:

K-C≡N

You figure it out.

0 recs  |  Comment 302 comments

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Comments

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I call a split

Does that make me an optimist or a realist?

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 5, 2008 7:26 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Stay away from Potassium Cyanide

I much prefer beer. I picked up some Cherry Wheat yesterday and was wondering what you guys’s thoughts are about it

by Susheel Ramasahayam on May 5, 2008 7:39 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

If you're talking about Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, go with the Cyanide instead.

Pick up a Stone IPA or Anderson Brewing Co. Oatmeal Stout for a better flavor experience.

I tried Lagunitas Maximum IPA and their Imperial Stout this weekend, and although they are good beers, I won’t add them to my regular rotation.

by Jed MC on May 5, 2008 9:21 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I had some Anderson Valley Summer Solstice this weekend

and now I have a new favorite beer. That’s some mighty impressive beer.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 9:29 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I've had a couple of their others

and liked them pretty well, but I’d never had the Summer Solstice. Damn, that’s good stuff.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 9:40 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yes.

Their winter solstice and summer solstice beers are the best things they make.

And that’s saying something.

by marc w on May 5, 2008 10:10 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

My girlfriend liked it. It was too much Cherry for me.

So I picked up a six pack of Belgian White. It tastes quite good.

by Susheel Ramasahayam on May 5, 2008 2:29 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Something tells me that those of that are going to go to LL Night

aren’t going to be paying much attention to this game.

Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.

"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert

by Goose on May 5, 2008 7:53 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Good job. You just ruined the surprise for everybody.

Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.

"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert

by Goose on May 5, 2008 8:04 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 5, 2008 8:49 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Dunno, how many games back are we right now?

6.5? 6.5 sounds like a good number for blowing this team up

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 9:13 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

i don't know

but i DO know that no amount of mathematical tinkering can quite
define just how fucking awful they looked this weekend…

seriously, is anybody gonna sit here and say THAT team has any
business in the playoffs?

short of about 5 guys simultaneously pulling their heads out of their
collective asses… what’s the point?

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 9:26 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

trying again:

if there was ever anything that made want to bother with the shift key less, it was watching that coat-hanger abortion the mariners put up this weekend.

so why bother with playoff speculation at this point?

unless, of course, we’re intentionally trying to drive ourselves insane.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:01 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No one here is speculating about the playoffs

“blow up the team” implies that we will dump all of the veterans and see what the younger players can do. That or make a panic trade. WOOOOOOOO PANIC TRADES!!!

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:03 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm speculating about the playoffs

my speculation is that they will, once again, be Seattle-free. Does that mean that it’s time to set the tree on fire? hmmmm.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:04 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Stop disproving my points.

It’s causing me to look stupid and impotent.

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:06 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

But at least you know which buttons to push

so that’s something. And something’s not nothing.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:07 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

So conclusions from this subthread

1. pdb knows what buttons to push
2. so does seattlebruin
3. Knowing what buttons to push is something
4. Nothing is not something. However, “nothing” is the worded version of the Mariners’ playoff chances. And offense, for that matter.

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:11 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I feel like rec'ing this post

and I have no idea why.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 9:59 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You and your rec button

Why don’t you two just get a room already? We know how badly you want to… use it ;)

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:02 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

you're just jealous

because I know which buttons to use.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:03 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

And I don't?

Watch this…

REC’D!

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:05 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I just got served.

unfortunately, I did not get served a delicious beer because I’m still at work.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:06 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oh, dude. My condolences.

all alcohol, or just beer?

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:09 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

beer, mostly

because of the yeast. but apparently all alcohol has it
in some measure. it’s not horrible… i just wake up with a
runny nose… kind of feel like i’m getting a cold… and then
it goes away around noon.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:10 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Gin will be your friend

that, and good vodka.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:13 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yeah

Exactly. Gin and Tonic has a little bit of god in it.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:15 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Amen

However, do not, as I did on Saturday, replace ‘tonic’ with ‘pringles’ and call it dinner.

by Graham on May 5, 2008 10:17 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I see you've stolen a page from my cookbook

Both my wife and I have this problem where we start drinking and forget to eat. Then, several hours in, we end up scraping around the kitchen for whatever we can find, which usually ends up being a handful of Wheat Thins or Doritos; this is a recipe for disaster.

I always thought that I’d eat better when I got married, but my wife eats like a bachelor too.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:19 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Note that "surprisingly not that bad" != good

but I may have to give that a try.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:16 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yeah, we only found this out when we permitted the cheap roommate who doesn't drink anything worthwhile

to buy the birthday party supplies. Usually it’s lots of crap, a two 12 packs of good-ish party beer (almost always Blue Moon) and one handle of Grey Goose or Belvedere.

My roommate came home with Coors Light and Kirkland Signature Vodka. I was not pleased.

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:21 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Most vodka is interchangeable with other vodkas

when put into mixed drinks. Even freezer-chilled ones can surprise you- I’m convinced that the Poles keep their good stuff at home and put the second-class stuff into fancy bottles to sell to stupid Americans.

Case in point: we had a vodka party where we all brought freezer vodka to drink straight shots, and the one that won out over the Belvedere, Vox, Ciroc and Grey Goose was the Wyborowa I got from a friend of mine who went to a wedding in Poznan… and he paid something like 600 zlotys for it ($5).

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:46 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

when was this?

because 600 zloty is like $250

by Matthew on May 5, 2008 10:52 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

the USD figure is probably right

that jives with what I remember about alcohol prices in Poland.

the zloty is way off. Like 10-20 zloty.

by Matthew on May 5, 2008 10:56 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

And I'm rather fond of Wyborowa, obviously.

Pity it’s damn near impossible to find in this state.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:58 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Really?

I used to see it a lot; it was never my favorite, so maybe I just haven’t been looking.

Currently, I sort of have a crush on Imperia Vodka, something from Russia. Man, that’s good stuff.

And while I agree that the distinctiveness of top shelf vodkas is often minimized in mixed drinks, I don’t think it just disappears. And if you’re having a martini (1/2 Imperia, 1/2 Hendricks/old Raj), having something good is pretty important.

by marc w on May 5, 2008 11:05 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

OK, conceded on the martini point.

I’m thinking more along the lines of people putting Grey Goose in their screwdrivers.

My favorite Russian vodka right now is this one:

http://www.stawskidistributing.com/Russia.html

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 11:10 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

BURN THE TREE!!1!!!!

I’m not sure I WANT to blow the team up, given that our returns on vet-for-prospect trades have generally sucked, compared to our draft choices. Maybe we should just let guys walk in the offseason.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:38 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Pity that Johjima isn't one of them.

I don’t see why they couldn’t have waited until the offseason to come to a decision to bring him back, but it’s the Seattle Mariners: extending contracts to fading veterans since 2002.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:40 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yeah

The more i think about the Johjima resigning, the more i’m bummed out. Why couldn’t they have told him (or his agent, or themselves) that they wanted to re-sign him, but that he had to put up some solid numbers before they committed?
We all know Johjima is more than likely to regain some semblance of normality, but it’s still so goddamned par for the course for this team.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:46 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The problem with the signing isn't the timing,

since Kenji’s BABIP is ridiculously low and it’s ludicrous to think that he won’t somewhat regress to the mean. The problem is that catchers have this unfortunate tendency to break down really fast because of how much they get beat up, and locking up a catcher for his age 32-35 seasons when he is only a marginal asset with the bat is shortsighted at best. Especially when Jeff Clement is coming and his value lies in him being able to play catcher.

I like Kenji a lot, I really do. Just not at $24M for season 32-35

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:50 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Exactly.

As opposed to Bill Bavasi using his awesome skills at finding dead-armed AAA pitchers.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:55 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yeah, good point. funny how you thought about that...

i had another sentence in that post about ‘especially when he’s a catcher on the bad side of 30 and is blocking our no.1 prospect’

but cut it out for length.

we were all thinking that when it happened though. but johjima is such a nice guy, and means well, that he kind of absolves himself from our wrath.

another thing is, what effect did it have on the other players on the team when they saw a guy in the middle of a slump get handed a huge wad of cash. you can’t tell me that wasn’t an ego blow to at least a few guys.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:53 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I don't care

That extension was criminally dumb.

by Graham on May 5, 2008 10:55 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Agreed

I honestly don’t understand the hesitation a lot of us had when it happened to just call total bullshit. Or maybe i missed something.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Some people did, some didn't

My feeling was that we now have the Japanese version of Dan Wilson.

OK, Johjima’s a better hitter than Wilson… though thanks to decline phase + typical C wear and tear, he’ll be in the 90ish OPS range. By the end of the contract, he should probably be a backup.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

the japanese version of dan

wilson, with a better bat, and less communication skills
with his pitchers.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 11:03 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

How do you know this

I’ve never met Johjima myself so I have no idea whether he’s a nice guy or a complete asshole.

Whenever you want to championsome athlete who you know next to nothing about is a “nice guy”, remember two words: Kirby Puckett.

by JI on May 5, 2008 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

i'm not saying i know

But i’m saying that he comes across as affable, and down to earth.

Yeah, he could beat his wife everynight and scream ‘FAGGOT’ out the window when he drives by guys with long hair…

But, i guess i’m just assuming he’s a good person, and so are other people who maybe didn’t immediately scream bloody murder when he was re-signed.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 11:58 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Joh is my favorite Mariner

The first M I ever bought an authentic jersey of in fact, and even I think that contract was probably a bad idea.

by thewyrm on May 5, 2008 12:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

There wasn't much hesitation here that I recall

Of course, I was seeing red at the time so I most of my attention was focused on calling pro-extension people idiots.

by Graham on May 5, 2008 11:05 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm a nice guy, and I usually mean well

can I have several million dollars now please?

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You know how they say that how to be a playoff team

is to go .500 on the road and make it up at home? Well we’re like the opposite. .500 at home and lose the rest on the road :(

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 9:43 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

You're doing it wrong

Days until we’re completely boned
-35

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 10:25 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

-180

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 10:37 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

is it too early to just give up?

I love them and they just keep hurting my fellings over and over and over.

by InSpokane on May 5, 2008 10:34 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Stop chopping down trees!

Is felling really that important right now?

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 10:38 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

shit feelings

I’ve donng that a lot this morning.

by InSpokane on May 5, 2008 10:39 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wait so this hacker POS erased my drunken playoff guarantee?

What a fucker!

Alright, I guarantee we make the playoffs, even though I am currently sober

Go Nova

by dbroncos31 on May 5, 2008 10:43 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I'm sure the Mariners could make the playoffs

They probably have an inside angle on tickets, being MLB employees after all.

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

He also erased my post about not yet giving up hope

the hacker has a profound sense of symbolism.

by JeffS on May 5, 2008 11:00 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

do you mind reposting

because like those stupid insurance commercials

by InSpokane on May 5, 2008 11:02 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

We're currently working to restore old posts that got deleted

but we’ve never had to do this before, and the database is huge, so it’ll be a little bit.

by JeffS on May 5, 2008 11:04 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

it's not hacking if you do it yourself

we’re on to you now.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 11:02 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Except they're called FanPosts

if you started calling tRA “Graham’s super duper cool pitching stat,” no one would know what it meant! I’m just going for consistency here!!

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Everyone likes Graham's super duper cool putching stat.

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Haha BLAM!

K-klunk

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Garland was trying to deflect attention

Luckily we have Igawa on our side

Go Nova

by dbroncos31 on May 5, 2008 11:44 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ok so

I just got a text that said, “The Mariners have dealt IF Greg Norton to the Braves for a player to be named later or cash considerations”. What the hell? I thought we just shit canned him?

by InSpokane on May 5, 2008 11:21 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Player to be named later...

Rafael Soriano.

It’s only fair.

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 5, 2008 11:24 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Rickrolled

I love the thought of John Schuerholz rickrolling Bavasi down the phone repeatedly.

by Alex B on May 5, 2008 12:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Titles of the next 13 Scherholtz text messages to Bavasi

We’ve know each other for so long
You know the rules, and so do I
A long commitment’s what I’m thinking of
You wouldn’t get this from any other guy
I just want to tell you how I’m feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Here, take Brent Lillibridge

by Gomez on May 5, 2008 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hehe

Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

by Alex B on May 5, 2008 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Just a reach-around.

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

a $100 gift certificate to Chilli's

and the change in John Smoltz’s pockets.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

He should get drunk at the meetings

He will make terrible trades anyway, so they might as well be rediculously crazy drunkard trades as well.

by thewyrm on May 5, 2008 11:58 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

hehe

That brings up an interesting question. Do you think the owners or upper management of a team would have any recourse with the league if a GM got trashed and made a horrible trade?

Like, say, Clement and Triunfel for Kerry Wood and Corey Patterson.

I mean, you have to wonder sometimes when you see GMs in any sport making trades that a fourth grader who doesn’t even know what a jock-strap is would be able to tell you is shit.

by lyleleander on May 5, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I would so organize "scouting trips" to Cancun

Or better yet, can you see Bavasi stumbling around the French Quarter with a half empty hurricane from Pat O’Brians in his hand screaming “Show me your tits!”

by thewyrm on May 5, 2008 12:13 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Creepy Girls Gone Wild Infomercial guy:

The party doesn’t get started ‘till Bill Bavasi makes the scene! Bill: “I aint got beads, but you can show me your tits for a prospect or two!”

by thewyrm on May 5, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yeah

Like Carlos Guillen for Ramon Santiago…

...ah son of a bitch.

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 5, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Speaking of which

I am imagining Greg Norton having a stellar year in Atlanta, as a pinch hitter or whatever they will have him doing there. And Bill Bavasi will have nothing to show for it.

by Fin on May 5, 2008 12:13 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Except his drink tab

don’t forget his drink tab

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Also:

Why is Duran Duran playing 2B for the Rangers?

by eponymous_coward on May 5, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

increasingly desperate for relevance in the 21st century

they’ll do whatever it takes.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 1:29 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

scroll lock.

bring back josé cruz jr!

by darmok on May 5, 2008 1:41 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Pause.

And F4. Also, this little symbol: `

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

F5, excuse me.

F4 Rules.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

All my f keys do different function

since I have a macbook. For example, F3 displays all the windows with expose, and F4 displays my dashboard, while F11 turns down the volume and F12 turns it up .

by Fin on May 5, 2008 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

F10 is really important

and that’s the one key my keyboard is missing.

by JI on May 5, 2008 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Num Lock

Fucking Num Lock.

by Paytheline on May 5, 2008 1:49 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Insert.

I fucking hate insert. When I click it instead of “delete” and suddenly all my text starts overwriting itself. Fuck that. Who in the world needs that?

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:51 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Might use

some of those keys with numbers on them on top of the letter keys.

by Paytheline on May 5, 2008 1:51 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No way. Number pads are far better.

But I have no number pad on my laptop, and I DO have a number lock… So… That may actually be the most useless key on my keyboard.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:52 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

What the hell are you talking about!?

The ten-key is God’s greatest gift to mankind.

by BrianL on May 5, 2008 1:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ah yes.

Breasts, then the ten-key.

by BrianL on May 5, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Also, Firefox.

But the 10-key is pretty high up there, to be sure.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:56 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

on my keyboard at work

F11 replicates the Z function on this here website.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 1:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hey, mine too!

Which is good because my left hand just can’t handle game threads.

by JI on May 5, 2008 1:51 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well played.

I did not see that coming.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:52 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

nope

” ` ” is a tear: :`(

by JI on May 5, 2008 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No it isn't. An asterisk works better: :*(***

How is the tear leaving from the far left of the eye. I think not.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

So does your face.

Snap.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:53 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

@---<---------

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

. .
O <=====

by JI on May 5, 2008 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

(_|_)

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

~~~~~~~~~~~~

who uses this??~~~ You can;t even use it to write Iba~nez

by Fin on May 5, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I do.

It means “about” or “roughly.”

So, Sexson is a ~.200 hitter.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

i use it ~5 times a day

bring back josé cruz jr!

by darmok on May 5, 2008 1:56 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You just have to click hard enough.

Ibañez. See?

the other angels fan

by Eyebrows on May 5, 2008 2:06 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

huh?

question marks? parenthses? brackets? asterisks?

by Matthew on May 5, 2008 2:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

without parenthses

(you couldn’t do this)

by JI on May 5, 2008 3:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

might be a decent option for RF

I don’t think Wlad is gonna be the answer.

FREE JEREMY REED!!

by MFAN on May 5, 2008 1:32 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Matt Scherzer starting tonight for the D-Backs

23 innings in AAA Tucson: 38 K, 3 BB
4 1/3 perfect innings, 7 K’s in long relief in only MLB outing last week

by vkut79 on May 5, 2008 3:06 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Which one's the crazy one?!

Yesterday's Pants
A blog-thingy about the Mariners and stuff.

by BrettJMiller on May 5, 2008 3:15 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

He looks like a Real Doll.

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 3:16 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Holy..... whoa!

How does that happen?

I’m probably gonna end up watching their game… cuz the M’s are pretty darn boring.

by vkut79 on May 5, 2008 3:18 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

They call him Mad Max.

Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.

"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert

by Goose on May 5, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's a bionic eye!

Like the $6million man! That’s why he has such good control!

the other angels fan

by Eyebrows on May 5, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's Max Scherzer

Felix Hernandez may be The King, but Justin Upton is a GOD.

"I eagerly await the day when I can shit in the living room"
~Robert

by Goose on May 5, 2008 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

here is a letter I am sending to the M's regarding the up coming series. I was hoping to embed the youtube video

May 5, 2008

Dear Mariners (Except King Felix Hernandez, Erik Beddard, Adrian (Captain Awesome) Beltre, and Ichiro),

It saddens me to write this letter, especially after so many years, but you have broken my heart too many times. If you don’t change your ways, I’ll have to move on. I am not one to just toss around ultimatums, but I feel you have taken me for granted for too many years.

Time and time again, you’ve told me that you will change, that you will do better, but they are always hollow promises. Recently it seems you have become even more nonchalant, which I think could be my fault. Admittedly, I have been hanging out with people on the North-side of Chicago and in Tampa Bay. They are fun, but they still don’t hold a candle to what you and I had in the old days.

I will give you four days to me show you still care about us. Please don’t let me down.

Yours,

Neil

P.S.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdZb2inh4YM

by InSpokane on May 5, 2008 3:34 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Sorry, didn't want to be snarky

but it would look really bad if you sent an email to the Mariners and accidentally mis-spelled the name of the one of the star players

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 3:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Let me guess.. Rickroll?

I like midgets more than I should.

by Thingray on May 5, 2008 4:37 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yep.

Haven’t you memorised the URLs yet?

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 4:39 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

no such thing

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 4:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Woah, mindfuck

Try this one for size too. I think even pdb might find this one amusing:

8-bit Rickroll

by Alex B on May 5, 2008 5:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Knowing pdb, I doubt that.

But I find it entertaining.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 5, 2008 5:30 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Not so much

but better than the standard rick roll if you must do one I guess.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 9:17 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think we need a running "Player of the day" type deal like

Bluebird Banter’s Jay of the Day or Boyfriend of the Day at Royals Review.

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 4:42 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Scapegoat of the Day

Would seem more fitting in these dire times.

by Alex B on May 5, 2008 4:47 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hmmmm

I could get on board with Scapegoat of the Day.

by seattlebruin on May 5, 2008 4:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Do other team's player count?

Someone say something witty.

by Omerta on May 5, 2008 4:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

MATT KATA!

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 4:51 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Or how about

Bonds of the Day

Today’s BOTD is Barry Bonds

by Alex B on May 5, 2008 4:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Knowing the M's, our Bonds of the Day would probably be

Gary “U.S.” Bonds

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on May 5, 2008 4:56 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Series EE Bonds

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on May 5, 2008 9:17 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

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