18-30
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 10:42 PM PDT
in Game Recaps
70 comments
Hypothesis
This team couldn't possibly be as bad as it was four years ago.
Evidence
-The pitching staff's a lot better. We have a 4.34 FIP so far in 2008, as opposed to 4.96 in 2004. Even with a bunch of solid innings turned in by Freddy Garcia and Bobby Madritsch, that wasn't enough to save a lousy group. And while the back of our rotation has completely tanked so far, at least this year's edition of the team has quality pitching depth to...um....step in and...zuh...
-The offense is a lot better. The 2008 team's .309 OBP and .384 SLG run circles around the 2004 team's .331...and .396...this doesn't...but depth, we have depth, right? Clement and...and the...
-The defense is a lot better. You'd rather have a .312 BABIP than a .289 BABIP, right? Except...hey wait...but I thought...
Conclusion
oh shit
Biggest Contribution: Ichiro, +2.8%
Biggest Suckfest: Miguel Batista, -30.0%
Most Important AB: Ibanez DP, -10.7%
Most Important Pitch: Inge homer, -15.7%
Total Contribution by Pitcher(s): -36.5%
Total Contribution by Hitters: -18.4%
Total Contribution by Opposition: +4.9%
(What is this chart?)
(Note: I don't actually think we're as bad as we were in 2004 but man oh man would that ever be hilarious. And in Pythagorean terms we're right on track.)
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You know what would make this funnier?
If you deleted the frames in which Raul reappears.
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 10:48 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
This was the edit I liked
don’t fuck with my creative vision.
(j/k hugs, the video is available below, knock yourself out).
by JI on May 22, 2008 10:50 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
as much as I like him dantily scampering after tha ball
I’m beginning to think you’re tight.
by JI on May 22, 2008 10:55 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I trust your software more than my software
Make it happen.
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 10:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
By removing Raul?
I just don’t see it. Raul running in from the right and disappearing is what makes the whole thing. For me, at least.
by Teej on May 22, 2008 11:12 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Removing his second appearence.
...in other words we want and endless loop of him wiping out—but it’s not working each time I try to alter the gif the speed is all wrong and the picture is distorted and it’s not working.
by JI on May 22, 2008 11:15 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
The video is archived in fanshots if anyone else wants to take a stab.
I don’t have a good video editor to take out the frames from the original source.
by JI on May 22, 2008 11:17 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Make sure you do not remove the ball bouncing for a while.
See if you can cut right before he reappears, so the ball is rolling for a while… RAUL … rolling…......... cut.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:17 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Absolutely.
The long lead-up to Raul flying by is what makes it so funny.
by Teej on May 22, 2008 11:25 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, that's what I attempted
but it looked like an acid trip
by JI on May 22, 2008 11:26 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I'd help, but I don't know anything about computer software,
let alone .gif creation.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:36 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
No, not by removing Raul altogether.
By removing when he reappears afterwards, so it is just a brief instant of the ball going right by him and him stumbling.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:16 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oh, I got it
yea this way would be amazing
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie
by cougfan on May 22, 2008 11:22 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I don't know why I can't get this to go faster
by Jeff on May 23, 2008 12:53 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Still a lot of fun to watch.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 23, 2008 12:58 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey, that's alightly worse than what mine enfed up like.
by JI on May 23, 2008 1:10 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
One of these days I'll seize admin power
and my posts will make slightly more sense.
by JI on May 23, 2008 1:13 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:02 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
It's come to this
I actively root for the dramatic and spectacular failure of this team. I enjoyed this nutcrusher of a series in Detroit WAY more than I did the Padres games that we won two of.
I don’t feel any conflict in the least about it. I only hope that the players I do like (Ichiro, Beltre, Wlad, Felix, RRS, Lopez, Putz) turn in good performances, and the rest of these douchebags get run out of town, from the top down.
Does anyone really disagree that the Sexson fight hasn’t been the best moment of the season? All that rage and frustration, focused into smashing the face of an idiot Texan, is really the only feeling that I associate with these 2008 Mariners.
by Jordan of Boise on May 22, 2008 10:49 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
At this point I'm afraid that brawl may have to account for like ten of the Top 50 Mariner Moments of 2008
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 10:50 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
off the top of my head
#2 Burke keeps Washburn’s ERA under 12
#1 The Raul lawndart.
by JI on May 22, 2008 10:54 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Why not do a top 50 best worst moments of 2008.
Where you list in descending (ascending?) order the most embarrassing moments/plays of 08. That would be hilarious, and I bet you’d enjoy doing it.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:06 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Because I present the list in the offseason and I prefer to be happy in the offseason
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 11:06 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
You don't find this funny yet?
I find it funny.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:08 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
This will not be funny in the offseason when I want to be happy
by Jeff on May 22, 2008 11:11 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
You can use gifs.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:12 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
You are wittier any anyone could ever imagine.
I think I laughed too hard at that based on what it is.
Anyway, rec
Yesterday's Pants
A blog-thingy about the Mariners and stuff.
by BrettJMiller on May 23, 2008 1:38 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Agreed
At least the more we lose, the more it sends signals to the FO that this team needs to be blown up.
Besides, it’s already practically a dead meme, but c’mon – Strasburg.
The artist formerly known as Katal
by Katal LM on May 22, 2008 10:57 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
only thing is, the team doesn't need to be blown up
the FO does.
by Matthew on May 22, 2008 11:04 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I root for their failure.
Though the Sexson fight is not number one, as there was no frustration left at that point. It was just funny. Well… I mean… I guess it could be number 1 in terms of overall hilarity.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:07 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I couldn't bear to watch today.
But I wanted to do something similar.
I had a colonoscopy.
by Paytheline on May 22, 2008 10:51 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
I forget:
Why did we release Bobby Madritsch?
by pup on May 22, 2008 11:16 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Did anybody see Churchill's comments about Beltre?
He said the M’s have no shot at re-signing him and that it’s more than just a hunch. Not that it surprises me, but what would we do without King Awesome?
by Happybelly on May 22, 2008 11:29 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Carlos Triunfel, meet 3rd base. 3rd base, Triunfel
Meanwhile, you hope/pray that Tui grows up really quick.
by Gomez on May 22, 2008 11:54 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
How's his defense?
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 22, 2008 11:58 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
His defense at short right now is [pukes]. He really struggles in the middle infield since you have to be able to cover so much ground.
His future probably is at 3rd. No one knows how he’d play it because, obviously, he hasn’t.
by Gomez on May 23, 2008 12:02 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Sorry, I meant Tui.
Or are you talking about Tui?
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on May 23, 2008 12:11 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I hope red doesn't see this
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie
by cougfan on May 23, 2008 12:50 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
so...Mike Morse is starting at 3rd in 2010
FREE JEREMY REED!!
by MFAN on May 23, 2008 1:59 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
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