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Players I Had No Idea Were Still In The League

So I was just scrolling through box scores, as I am wont to do when it's nighttime and the Mariners aren't playing, and when I clicked on Houston/San Francisco, I happened upon an unexpected sight:

  IP H R ER BB K HR Season ERA 
B. Moehler 5.0 8 3 3 0 2 1 4.58

Brian Moehler. This guy. 5743_medium The guy who the Reds picked up for Noochie Varner at the deadline when he was supposedly on his last legs back in 2002.

I couldn't believe it. I consider myself to be pretty damn up to date when it comes to being familiar with current Major Leaguers and for whom they play, but this one caught me by surprise. Brian Moehler's still around and even getting himself some starts. Who knew?

This discovery inspired me to go through everyone who's played in the big leagues this year to find out who else I'm missing. What follows is a list of such players, in no particular order:

Ramon Santiago
Aaron Boone
Kevin Cash
Wil Nieves
Brady Clark
Damion Easley
Marlon Anderson
Robby Hammock
Luis Rivas
Jose Cruz Jr.
Nelson Figueroa
Mark Redman
Chan Ho Park
Chad Durbin
Justin Miller
Ron Mahay
Ramon Ramirez
Mike Lincoln
Doug Waechter
Seth McClung
Kent Mercker
Keith Foulke
Tim Byrdak
Russ Springer
Chad Fox
Yhency Brazoban
Armando Benitez

Aside from having been forgotten, all these guys also share the common trait of being terrible. Lesson being, if you want me to remember that you're still in the Major Leagues, don't suck. Or suck spectacularly. If you just suck a little bit and either occupy an unimportant role or disappear for a while, that's a great way to make people think you're lying when you introduce yourself at parties.

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If I have herpes and I pass it on to all of you

I celebrate it because now we’re all connected forever

This is kind of like that

by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on May 15, 2008 6:57 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

No, I meant, Aaron Boone is still in the league?

I thought he was gone like two years ago.

by Matthew on May 14, 2008 10:42 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Not only that, but check out his batting line.

He’s been absolutely incredible for us as a bench bat/1B backup. Limited AB, of course (sample size blah blah blah) but so far it’s worked out well.

by esoteric on May 14, 2008 10:48 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

He also went to Spring Training with the Nationals but couldn't hack it and retired from baseball halfway through.

Once more, I commend people to check out Aaron Boone’s statistically unsustainable 2008 batting line: coming into today’s game (where he went 1 for 3) it was .319/.385/.596 with an OPS+ of 154.

The beauty of small sample size is that it can make even Aaron Fucking Boone look like Lance Berkman.

by esoteric on May 14, 2008 10:53 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

not true

He decided to start the season in the minors. He’s currently on AAA Columbus’s reserve list, but in 13 games this season he is putting up a line of .261/.327/.348

So yeah, he’s done, and if he’s on the reserve list I doubt he plays another game

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by I'm NOT Corco on May 15, 2008 12:56 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Huh. Coulda sworn he bowed out completely.

Well good for Bret. But he’s cashed.

by esoteric on May 15, 2008 11:02 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I thought he retired (again) as well..

I like midgets more than I should.

by Thingray on May 15, 2008 11:28 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

BTW, Aaron Boone was 2 for 4 again today, raising his BA to .327

That includes the hit that broke up Pelfrey’s no-no in the 7th. And with Nick Johnson out for 4-6 weeks he’ll be seeing even more playing time.

by esoteric on May 15, 2008 6:56 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Kent Mercker?

Holy shit. I can’t believe that guy was responsible for the majority of two no hitters.

by JI on May 14, 2008 10:39 PM PDT   0 recs

Here are a few more

The Molina brothers
Mike + Mark Sweeney
Guillermo Quiroz
Steve Trachsel
Jon Lieber
Doug Brocail
Paul Lo Duca
Ron Belliard
David Eckstein
Marco Scutaro
Gregg Zaun
Eddie Guardado
Cliff Floyd
Troy Percival
Ron Villone
Trevor Hoffman
Shawn Estes
Doug Mientkiewicz
Alan Embree
Keith Foulke
Damion Easley
Craig Counsell
Esteban Loaiza
Mark Grudzielanek
Hideo Nomo!!!
Ron Mahay

by Edgar for Pres on May 14, 2008 10:53 PM PDT   0 recs

Hoffman?

seriously?

The Molina brothers?

We laugh at Benji everyday, and his brother is like 26 years old.

We just saw Guardado yesterday…

and Eckstein, everybody hates Eckstein, we haven’t forgotten about him.

by JI on May 14, 2008 10:55 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Nomo surprises me

Mark Sweeney sorta, but I knew everyone else was in the majors, and a lot of those guys play important roles on their teams

Corky Miller is a bit of a shock to me

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by I'm NOT Corco on May 15, 2008 12:57 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Shawn Estes hhahahaha

I think he’s the only one on your list and not Jeff’s that I didn’t know was still in the bigs. Maybe him and Counsell

by seattlebruin on May 15, 2008 8:22 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I saw Estes pitch in Mt. Vernon a long time ago.

I can’t remember the name of the field, but it was south of downtown along the river. He had no command and a pretty lousy attitude that day. The one play I remember is someone got picked off first base. The runner attempted to dive, but he fell straight down like Richie trying to dive for a grounder.

by Jed MC on May 15, 2008 8:47 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Remember this game?

Didn’t they find out he was cheating a few days later?

by JI on May 14, 2008 10:57 PM PDT   0 recs

Justin Miller's actually decent.

He could stand to walk fewer guys but his strikeout rate is good.

We don't negotiate with terrorists.

by Mariner John on May 14, 2008 11:01 PM PDT   0 recs

I remember he was awesome

for a season and a half ,like, ten years ago, and then he got hurt, started to suck and lost his job to Placido Polanco.

by JI on May 14, 2008 11:04 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Believe it or not

but Tatis just got called up by the Mets.

by Milendriel on May 14, 2008 11:12 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

wow.

...and now I'm here

by Librocrat on May 15, 2008 12:48 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

He's hitting

1.000 for the season.

Haters.

by JohnPeterson on May 15, 2008 1:58 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

haha

I saw his corpse play in Tacoma last week

Good for him

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by I'm NOT Corco on May 15, 2008 12:57 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

He was hitting for New Orleans

Prepare, Mets fans, to have his two grand slams in one inning brought up again and again.

by Gomez on May 15, 2008 8:17 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I will never forget his name because of that feat.

I can’t wait until that is a trivia question in 10 years and I will be one of the few to know.

by Wilder. on May 14, 2008 11:51 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I remember that too

he was amazing in Ken Griffey Jr. baseball on N64.

The poster formerly known as Matt.

by bluemax on May 15, 2008 12:43 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Russ Springer and Kent Mercker were the two guys I was shocked about.

If Miguel Cairo was not a Mariner, he would be on this list. Also, Arthur Rhodes

by Wilder. on May 14, 2008 11:50 PM PDT   0 recs

Kent Mercker

Speaking of baseball zombies….

by Gomez on May 15, 2008 8:16 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I await the career resurrection of Kent Bottenfield

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 15, 2008 12:44 AM PDT   0 recs

Good point.

Now where did Tony La Russa put Adam Kennedy…

Coldly devouring reason as if it were a delectable snack

by Frosty Raptor on May 15, 2008 1:24 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

We won the WS because of that trade.

o_0

~Till the Halo burns out...

by Zu Long on May 15, 2008 11:05 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Maybe

But maybe not. When the trade was made, we had Troy Percival, Garret Anderson, Tim Salmon, Darin Erstad to sign, as well as Edmonds. Mo Vaughn was a $10 million anchor around our necks. We had no one who could play second base, and our pitching sucked. Someone in the outfield had to go. Would it be A) the 26 year old with a down season on the heels of two pretty good seasons, B) the 28 year old constantly healthy hit machine, C) the 31 year old franchise keystone, or D) the 30 year old who was pretty good but an injury threat, plus something of a clubhouse douchebag.

The Angels went with D), and in return got one of the best 2B prospects in baseball plus a 30-year old reliever turned starter. The second part was risky, but if you look at Stoneman’s options at the time, he didn’t have a whole lot of choice. Ken Hill and Tim Belcher were still under contract, and our farm system had Jarrod Washburn, Scott Schoenweis, Ramon Ortiz and Seth Etherton. He needed some kind of pitching help and a cheap 2B-man to build for the future, and Jim Edmonds was the cost for that.

Now Bottenfield tanked, but while AK was never a great hitter, he was a great defensive 2B. And defense is a big part of what got us to the playoffs. (Jarrod Washburn, Ramon Ortiz, and Kevin Appier all had good years because our defense kicked ass). If we keep Jim Edmonds, do we get a good defensive 2B? Or just the pitcher? And what about the guy we traded? Erstad, Anderson and Salmon all came up huge in 2002, Erstad on defense mostly, but still huge.

Plus if Jim Edmonds never goes to St. Louis, does he have his breakout year at 30? He gave credit for his offensive performance to tutoring from Mark McGuire. If not, do we still win in 2002? Also, there’s some indication that Edmonds wanted out of Anaheim after his arbitration was up anyway. Do the cash-strapped Angels manage to outbid the rest of the league for Edmonds in the 2000 off-season?

I’ve thought about it a lot, and I’m not sure we win the WS in 2002 without the Edmonds trade.

~Till the Halo burns out...

by Zu Long on May 15, 2008 12:27 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I'm not saying it was neccesialiy a BAD idea to trade him

they just didn’t get much in return. That’s one of those trades that looks awful in hindsight, but wasn’t AS awful at the time.

It’s funny how many players credit Mark McGwire with turning them into a much better hitter. I hope that someday he takes up the offer to become a coach.

by JI on May 15, 2008 12:39 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

That's true enough.

It definitely wasn’t the highlight of Stoneman’s GMing career, but I feel like it wasn’t that bad a move given what he had to work with, and few of us are complaining now about the results.

It’s funny how many players credit Mark McGwire with turning them into a much better hitter. I hope that someday he takes up the offer to become a coach.

You don’t need a coach to teach people to take steroids. :-P

Sorry, couldn’t resist.

~Till the Halo burns out...

by Zu Long on May 15, 2008 2:20 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

hmmm

Chad Fox and Kent Mercker are the two real surprises for me on that list

Determined, Jonesing Commentor

by I'm NOT Corco on May 15, 2008 12:58 AM PDT   0 recs

Does anybody remember what Jose Cruz Jr.'s ceiling was when he was called up?

I vaguely remember reading an article in elementary school that compared him to Ken Griffey Jr. I also remember a bit of consternation over trading him for Paul Spoljaric and Mike Timlin. Funny how it’s the other deal for relief pitching that the M’s would like to have back.

Meh. Darren Brag