Aaaaaaaand This Begs For A Caption Contest
The person with the best caption wins a comment recommendation from yours truly and a free subscription to the True.com Sexy Singles newsletter.
I'm going with Seattle Mariners third baseman Adrian Beltre signals for a timeout after identifying a fan on the field as Izzy Alcantara.
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"To no avail, Adrian Beltre try's to tell his biggest fan Red not to use his laser-vaporizer on Mike Reilly after Beltre was called out on strikes before being allowed to appeal his own swing."
I fucking hate you Mariners
by kentroyals5 on Apr 5, 2008 11:31 PM PDT 1 recs
Adrian Beltre does battle with the catchers maks that magician Yuniesky Betancourt has bewitched to chase him around the field
by nadzor on Apr 5, 2008 11:37 PM PDT 1 recs
"Beltre called time out. While his pitch recognition wasn't the greatest, he couldn't shake the feeling that the last pitch was in fact a catcher's mask."
by Jeff Weaver's Doritos on Apr 5, 2008 11:40 PM PDT 1 recs
"Use the Force, Adrian."
"Your eyes may deceive you. Only the Force helps you battle the masked enemy who cannot be seen."
formerly known as mdl
by iglew on Apr 5, 2008 11:42 PM PDT 0 recs
Don't make me slap you, Invisible Catcher! I've got a bat!
by Gomez on Apr 5, 2008 11:52 PM PDT 0 recs
Home plate umpire Jerry Crawford
evaporated from the intense heat generated by an Adrian Beltre stare down during an appeal of a called strike check swing.
Baseball been bery, bery good to me. - Chico Escuela
by 116in01 on Apr 5, 2008 11:55 PM PDT 0 recs
oh man I've got to stop cheesing on game day
I am totally tripping balls
by JI on Apr 6, 2008 12:10 AM PDT 0 recs
"Well,"
a winded and slightly disheveled Beltre explained, "I first suspected something was off when instead of calling the pitch, home plate umpire Jim Joyce bear hugged Pierzynski from behind and cackled menacingly. It’s not often you actually hear someone cackle. I mean, really cackle. So when he and A.J. dematerialized, I just knew Jim had kidnapped A.J. and escaped somewhere back in time, and it was up to me – and my familiarity with Quantum-mechanical phenomena – to save him. It was a simple matter of deduction to know where in time Joyce would most likely taking him. I pointed down to the first base umpire to corroborate my theory, though I suppose in retrospect it wasn’t all that necessary. Anyway, you all know the rest, and that’s how Red and I saved the universe. Honest. You can check with the first base umpire if you don’t believe me! He’ll tell you!"
by Jamelah on Apr 6, 2008 12:12 AM PDT 0 recs
Overheard in the stands....
"Yellow and blue for Adrian .... pitch comes along... and THAT happened! Over to the right.... I'm not sure what that means..."
by abelard on Apr 6, 2008 12:20 AM PDT 0 recs
Here goes...
Seattle's Adrian Beltre recoils in shock after seeing that Jason Voorhees is on a mission to be the only guy with a sports mask.
by SethGrandpa on Apr 6, 2008 12:40 AM PDT 0 recs
Note "shock" not "fear"
Beltre fears nothing except the occasional curvy pitch.
by SethGrandpa on
Apr 6, 2008 12:42 AM PDT
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Adrian Beltre performs as lead dancer for the Weather Girls' new 7th inning stretch tune "It's Raining Masks"
The A's colors are green and gold.
by mikeA on Apr 6, 2008 12:45 AM PDT 0 recs
And I'm rather drunk...
Doing a similar reply to the thread half an hour later.
by Sidi on
Apr 6, 2008 1:09 AM PDT
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"Whack a Mole? No, this is Wack a Mask!"
Curse you, Detroit Lions!
by Coach Owens on Apr 6, 2008 2:02 AM PDT 0 recs
Despite the recent nationwide cat ban
Adrian Beltre is caught "cheesing his fucking brains out" in the middle of a game. Afterward, Beltre attempted to rationalize his use of the illegal substance, "Have you seen our offense?"
The Mariners organization has yet to release an official statement.
by thenatural on Apr 6, 2008 2:52 AM PDT 0 recs
Seattle Mariners third baseman Adrian Beltre reacts to the floating catchers' mask before appealing to the 1st base umpire.
by ThundaPC on Apr 6, 2008 2:55 AM PDT 0 recs
Accosted by what appeared to be an invisible catcher and having difficulty deciding whether to bludgeon his opponent to death or vaporise him with heat-vision, Adrian Beltre appeals for time.
by Graham on Apr 6, 2008 3:43 AM PDT 0 recs
Someone could probably put this more eloquently:
"King Awesome halts the universe of time to delve into the mind and soul of his opponent."
by Wilder. on Apr 6, 2008 5:34 AM PDT 0 recs
Adrian Beltre battles the black hole of suck that has pulled Ramon Hernandez from the place of existence
by OlSalty on Apr 6, 2008 7:15 AM PDT 0 recs
Ill shoot
The Mariners' Adrian Beltre reacts in shock as the entire Orioles team disappears from the face of the earth from this season's sheer irrelevance.
by sandalfan on Apr 6, 2008 7:52 AM PDT 0 recs
Adrian Beltre
was forced to fend off the apparently haunted catcher's mask with his bat for more than 4 minutes until the grounds crew could arrive with a makeshift net. There is still no official explanation for how or why the mask floated out of the Orioles clubhouse and attacked Beltre. "I never really thought those fencing lessons would come in so handy," Beltre quipped afterwards.
*Visiting Angels fan* Never give up, never surrender!
by TheOptimist on Apr 6, 2008 9:28 AM PDT 0 recs
I was too slow typing up my fencing reference... now I look like I was copying.
by WWUPhil on
Apr 6, 2008 9:38 AM PDT
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S'Okay, you went in a completely different direction. ^_^
*Visiting Angels fan* Never give up, never surrender!
by TheOptimist on
Apr 6, 2008 9:45 AM PDT
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Beisdes, I just noticed that if you look carefully in the background...
this picture was taken while they were facing the Rangers. Oops. >_<
*Visiting Angels fan* Never give up, never surrender!
by TheOptimist on
Apr 6, 2008 9:52 AM PDT
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Coming from a fellow Angels fan, this might seem like bias, but
WINNER.
~Till the Halo burns out...
by Zu Long on
Apr 8, 2008 8:40 AM PDT
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King Awesome says
"Your welcome for the seppuku, bitch"
by don gato on Apr 6, 2008 9:29 AM PDT 0 recs
Two possibilities
1. Batter Adrian Beltre signals baserunner Ichiro Suzuki to return to third base after realizing that pitcher Bugs Bunny, arguably the best player ever banned from baseball, had employed the famous switcharoo play in which he pitches the catchers mask and then tags out the runner leading off of the base. It was all for naught as Beltre, Vidro, and Wilkerson all struck out on the ensuing pitch. It was described as a slow, curvy ball, the main weakness of the 2008 mariners.
or
2. Olympic qualifier Adrian Beltre, Dominican Republic, protests the host nation China's mistreatment of Tibetans by holding a fencing exhibition against the world's most difficult opponent, the invisible man. Beltre is revolutionary in fencing after employing a bat as opposed to the traditional epee or foil, only after his attempt at using no instrument failed.
by WWUPhil on Apr 6, 2008 9:36 AM PDT 0 recs
Clearly, it's:
Funk Blasted: Adrian Beltre, in full disco motion, is stunned by his first ever Reverse Funk Blast, which ejected the catcher, and not the ball, from the field of play at Oriole Park at Camden Yards late Saturday. No runs were credited for this version of the Funk Blast, though the catcher had to be replaced. The Orioles won the game 6-4.
LaRussa for 2008 Manager!
by EireDuck on Apr 6, 2008 10:39 AM PDT 0 recs
Adrian Beltre
will take some time getting used to new 3rd string emergency catcher David Eckstein (and his amazing see-through skin!)
but what he lacks in skin pigmentation and visibility he makes up with...uh...
by Karma Police on Apr 6, 2008 12:51 PM PDT 0 recs
"Stand Back!...
..I'll deal with this."
"Get offa my lawn!"
by Greybear on Apr 6, 2008 1:22 PM PDT 0 recs
Seattle Mariners third baseman Adrian Beltre waits to be tapped in by Houston Rockets center Yao Ming during this year's Annual Pro Sports Battle Melee. To his right, Melee veteran Alan Iverson slings a trophy from his recent conquest over Milwaukee Brewers catcher Jason Kendall. Beltre is 3-0 lifetime for this charity event, raising over $40,000 for autism research through match pledge donations.
by iheartjavelinas on Apr 6, 2008 1:24 PM PDT 0 recs
Caption
"Beltre just recently finished watching 'Saturday Night Fever'"
by marinerbaseball116 on Apr 6, 2008 3:13 PM PDT 0 recs
"I said throw me a belt high fastball!!!!"
Funk for '08!
by shunter160 on Apr 6, 2008 5:29 PM PDT 0 recs
hmmmm
"Rangers Catcher Gerald Laird had apparently laughed at Beltre's appeal of his own check swing. After teleporting Laird to a remote part of Argentina, Beltre 'appealed' to the third base umpire and asked if anyone else had something to say."
"Beltre signals to a baserunner that Texas Catcher Gerald Laird had fallen for a classic trick: "I told him that there were free Funyons near the M's dugout."
"Adrian Beltre appealed to the first base umpire after determining that he, and not Gerald Laird and Tim McClelland (both caucasian) had survived the lightning attack by the demented killer. 'I have seen many movies,' said Beltre afterwards, 'and I have no seen this situation.'"
"Beltre's off-season workout plan included Tiger-Crane style, which helped getting home plate umpire Mark Carlson to change a called strike. Gerald Laird, not pictured, fainted."
by marc w on Apr 6, 2008 5:53 PM PDT 0 recs
Hello, my name is Adrian Beltre.
You kill my father. Prepare to die.
by borgy on Apr 6, 2008 8:06 PM PDT 0 recs
"Alarmed upon suddenly realizing...
that Texas Rangers catcher Ghost Laird is spooking him on Martin Luther King Jrs birthday, Adrian Beltre asks "What would Ichiro do?' and immediately goes into Killer Kung Fu mode."
by kva15 on Apr 6, 2008 8:09 PM PDT 0 recs
Damn!
Evolution has done these mosquitoes well. Invisibility powers AND catchers masks??? Wow!
Ill Ligitamus Non Carberendum
by PositivePaul on Apr 7, 2008 9:04 AM PDT 0 recs
WWWWWWIIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAARD
Now you can choose the size of your circle.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on Apr 7, 2008 12:45 PM PDT 0 recs
I know this isn't one of the best,
but I'm curious how many people got this reference.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on
Apr 8, 2008 12:11 AM PDT
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That phone company commerical
Altell I think...whatever..it sucks!
I fucking hate you Mariners
by kentroyals5 on
Apr 8, 2008 12:38 AM PDT
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Awesome. I just wanted someone to get the reference.
...and now I'm here
by Librocrat on
Apr 8, 2008 1:18 AM PDT
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...um
"...the Snickers bar had flown from Beltre's left hand almost to the mound before Laird made his move..."
You could be a part-time model...but you'd probably still have to keep your normal job
by pakipaki on Apr 7, 2008 3:14 PM PDT 0 recs
Realizing he might have "caught a peice" of the catcher on his warm up swing.
King Awesome requests a time out from the umpire.
Fun Fact: Angels third baseman Chone Figgins' first name is actually pronounced "Shawn." And his last name is actually pronounced "Weinberg" (it's a silent "Figgins").
by Thingray on Apr 7, 2008 5:23 PM PDT 0 recs















