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4/27: Open Game Thread

Tiny by Jeff on in Game Threads Comment 726 comments

Oakland Athletics at Seattle Mariners, Apr 27, 2008 1:10 PM PDT


Lineup

Oakland Athletics @ Seattle Mariners

04/27/08 1:10 PM PDT

Oakland Athletics Seattle Mariners
Mark Ellis - 2B Ichiro Suzuki - CF
Daric Barton - 1B Jose Lopez - 2B
Emil Brown - RF Raul Ibanez - "LF"
Frank Thomas - DH Adrian Beltre - 3B
Jack Custoids - Pylon
 Greg Norton - DH
Bobby Crosby - SS Richie Sexson - 1B
Ryan Sweeney - CF Brad Wilkerson - RF
Rob Bowen - C Kenji Johjima - C
Jack Hannahan - 3B Yuniesky Betancourt - SS
W-L G GS CG SHO SV BS IP H R ER HR BB K ERA FIP
2008 - Felix Hernandez 2-0 5 5 1 0 0 0 37.2 33 9 7 3 12 31 1.67 3.48

W-L G GS CG SHO SV BS IP H R ER HR BB K ERA FIP
2008 - Joe Blanton 1-4 6 6 0 0 0 0 41.2 50 21 20 2 7 18 4.32 3.33


Earlier this morning, whilst I lay in bed and accompanied Eliza Dushku to Home Depot to buy planks of redwood for her above-ground pool deck, there came a knock that aroused me in all the wrong ways. Yawning, I stumbled out of my room and groggily opened the door, whereupon I was greeted by the pleasant faces of two middle-aged men with different ties and matching conviction. Exhausted and just the slightest bit hung over, at first I didn't do the math in my head, and so for about three or four minutes I stood there while they engaged me in conversation about current events and universal concerns. I nodded and mumbled and nodded some more, but gradually I began to come to and take stock of the situation, at which point one of the men asked me if I'm familiar with God.

I paused for a moment. Then, with a hint of a smile, I turned to the man and replied.

"I sure am."

I asked if they wouldn't mind letting me get to breakfast, so they issued me a polite farewell and walked away. I closed the door.

Today I don't have time for proselytization. Today I worship at the altar of Felix.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LET'S GO MARINERS!!

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Heathens

We don't negotiate with terrorists.

by Mariner John on Apr 27, 2008 11:51 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Sooooo.....

tomorrow you’ll have time for proselytization?

by brayden04 on Apr 27, 2008 11:58 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Tomorrow I have to go to work

but yeah, I wouldn’t mind.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:01 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

In a raspy fishman voice

Salutations, do you time to talk about the lord? . . . that’s okay kids, more in heaven for us.
God I love Venture Bros. Returns June 1st!!

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:01 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oh man

I shouldn’t have watched that, the wait is even more unbearable now!

The poster formerly known as Matt.

by bluemax on Apr 27, 2008 12:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Which begs the question

Who would you rather build a deck for? Eliza or King Felix?

Free Barry Bonds

by thejew4u on Apr 27, 2008 12:00 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Eliza

Felix can stare at a tree and make it build itself.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:01 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

All Hail the King!

Today he shall smote the A’s.

Go Nova

by dbroncos31 on Apr 27, 2008 12:00 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I love sunday day games!

They are the only games I get to watch in real time when I am at work up here in Prudhoe Bay.

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:00 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Whats it like up there

I’ve always wanted to drive the Dalton Highway.

by Robert on Apr 27, 2008 12:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I once got in a argument with a co-worker that was attending a seminary school

by saying that my God (Felix) was ten times the God that his was.

by Robert on Apr 27, 2008 12:01 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

In regards to praying for wins

Felix has 100 times the track record God does. Felix gets things done that Gods has trouble with.

by JI on Apr 27, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The stats prove it

Felix already has more career wins.

by Fett42 on Apr 27, 2008 12:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The two things that have confused my spirtuality the most over the least 10 years

Matchups of:
Randy Johnson v. Mark McGwire
Randy Johnson v. Jim Edmonds

I won’t know what to do if I ever see Felix v. Pujols

by JI on Apr 27, 2008 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

May the power of the Anti-Virus (Greg Norton) be with you

"I've seen many, many blue skies turn gray, but the sun will eventually return, and so will I. So will I." - Carlos Pena

by R.J. Anderson on Apr 27, 2008 12:03 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Rays lead Boston 1-0 in the 5th

going for the sweep.

James Shields is good.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:04 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

That 15 year old better slow it down

once you get that tramp label, it can be hard to live down.

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:17 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You're not fooling anyone

embrace your awesome perversion.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:24 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

ONE OF YOU

ONE OF YOU
ONE OF YOU
ONE OF YOU
ONE OF YOU
ONE OF YOU

by JI on Apr 27, 2008 12:26 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ok, you got me

I’ll take Rays away to a place no one can judge us for our love!

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

A major politician

just had a scandal where he had sex with a 15 year old girl. The guy is pretty old, maybe around 50 I think. Anyway, there were some people who were upset, but all the other politicians stood up for him saying “he didn’t do anything illegal.”

by brayden04 on Apr 27, 2008 12:34 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Up here in Alaska

as long as he/she is 16 it is legal.

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

State of Alaska Age of Consent law

At 16 years of age you become sexually independant unless the older party in the relationship has a position of power or authority over the juvenile, in which case the age becomes 18. You don’t have to think too hard to figure out why we have the highest incidents of rape, domestic abuse, and fetal alcahol syndrome per capita in the nation. We got problems.

by thewyrm on Apr 27, 2008 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think in WA

16 is ok if you are 4 or less years olders. So you can hook up with a 16 year old if you are 20. Hey, speaking of which, is Corco around?

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 12:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yeah the Romeo and Juliet laws

I don’t know why I know this. Honest.

by brayden04 on Apr 27, 2008 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I swear on my life I was

reading an article about this somewhere lately. But for the life of me I just can’t remember where it is.

by brayden04 on Apr 27, 2008 1:04 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

That's a whole lotta swearing on your life.

Sure you want your life riding on this?

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 1:05 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

hmmm....

Ok, you’re right. I swear on your life I read about this somewhere lately. And for the life of you I can’t remember where it is.

by brayden04 on Apr 27, 2008 1:10 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You could probably be the alcohol supplier

At a high school party, you could probably get plenty of high school tail that way.

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 12:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hah, loser.

I’m 20, but look 25/26 (thank God for the beard). The first time I was carded for anything, ever, was at the movie theater of all places a couple weeks ago.

by Liebkartoffel on Apr 27, 2008 12:58 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Extreme drunkeness

made more obvious by the fact that I voicing my disapproval of our right fielder.

by Robert on Apr 27, 2008 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Dude, when you are drunk

Just chill there, that’s what I have to do. Plus I guess when I grow stuble it makes me look a couple years older than I am so as long as I don’t get IDed Im ok.

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Just wondering

Hey Jeff I don’t mean to be nosey but….. I’ve been reading the site for a couple of years and I really don’t know much about yourself or any of the other "managers" of the site. Is there a bio section that I’m missing that would answer some of my questions? How did you guys acquire your baseball knowledge? Why are you a Mariner fan? What are you doing in California, etc…

by coasty141 on Apr 27, 2008 12:18 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

My profile bio is pretty accurate

I was born in San Diego and became a Mariners fan because (A) rooting for the home team is too easy, and (B) I have an uncle in Seattle who wasn’t weird and a little crazy when I started liking sports. If it weren’t for the old Texas Rangers ESPN message board, I may not be who I am today, because it was Adam Morris (now he writes Lone Star Ball) who introduced me to Baseball Prospectus, which put me on the road to knowledge. Ironically I now consider BP to be a little behind the times.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I was rushed

I don’t have time to be hilariously dishonest when I’m in a hurry.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 12:32 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

wait, this bio?

Jeff Sullivan is the modern-day descendant of a mutant family that has latent superhuman powers. Following an electrical accident, Sullivan finds himself transported into a parallel Earth where the Allies lost WW II and the Japanese rule America. After fighting the Japanese, Sullivan meets other members of his dimension-spanning family who teach him how to use his powers. He then returns to his Earth to fight crime.

by Matthew on Apr 27, 2008 12:34 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Jeff Sullivan

Jeff Sullivan is an intelligent and emotionally troubled teenager who sleepwalks, and experiences visual hallucinations possibly because of his schizophrenia (which he takes medication for), and is in the medical care of a psychiatrist. One night, a jet engine from a commercial aircraft falls into Jeff’s bedroom. He avoids death only because prior to the accident, he had obeyed a voice in his head that led him to sleepwalk outside of his room. The voice is that of Gomez, an apparently imaginary friend in a man-sized rabbit costume. At midnight on October 2, Frank prophesies to Jeff that the end of the world will occur in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes and 12 seconds.

Later, Jeff begins seeing “silvery plastic gel” spears that flow out from people’s chests. Such a spear indicates where a person will travel in the near future. In one example, Jeff sees one spear snake into the room, followed by his younger sister skipping through the room. Another spear leads Jeff to a pistol in his parents’ closet, which he takes and keeps.

Meanwhile, Gomez instructs Jeff to perform acts which provoke certain chains of events:

  • Jeff is instructed to flood his high school, which ends up giving him the opportunity to court his new classmate, Brent Lillibridge.
  • Jeff is intrigued by Gomez to pursue the question of time travel, so he starts a conversation with his science teacher. The teacher gives him the book “Juiced” by Jose Canseco, an old man known as “Grandma Death” among the neighborhood youth. The book explains the scenario that Jeff is going through.
  • Jeff burns down the house of a motivational speaker he ridiculed at a school assembly, thereby exposing the speaker’s secret “kiddie porn dungeon”. The speaker’s arrest begins a series of events that results in Jeff’s mother chaperoning Jeff’s younger sister and her dance group on a flight to Star Search in Los Angeles.

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Damn.

Do I get applauded anyway for the editing labor?

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You couldn't edit out

the kiddie porn dungeon?

by JI on Apr 27, 2008 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Why would I?

Patrick Swayze needs respect.

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

How come this looks so familiar?

And does Jeff look like this?

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

What I never understood

Was where all of a sudden the knife came from in that scene.

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I pissed myself first time I saw Frank

I had to shut my eyes for the first like 6 minutes of the movie first time I saw it.

by qrsouther on Apr 27, 2008 1:01 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Jeff lives in his mothers basement

On days where he feels the need to be presentable, he wears pants.

by Graham on Apr 27, 2008 12:43 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wang?

9 k’s against Cleveland? uh???

Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!

by MfaninAlaska on Apr 27, 2008 12:42 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Good News

Balentein back in the lineup for Tacoma… playing RF.

Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!

by MfaninAlaska on Apr 27, 2008 12:51 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I hate when the Mariners play Oakland

Because the stupid games are blacked out on MLB.com

One more reason I’ll be more than glad to move away from California…

by Ike Clanton on Apr 27, 2008 12:54 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Goddamn baseball fight

made me miss Kreguer’s bullet points.

by JI on Apr 27, 2008 12:56 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

This might be my last game for a few days/.

I have to move out of my flat in the morning so I’ll need to get broadband in my new place. Hope to go out with some low-stress, easy win Felix-related goodness.

Man, moving flats is so stressful. I just hope this game is enjoyable and not stressful…

Beware of the GTE.

by EnglishMariner on Apr 27, 2008 1:09 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Moving flats is a piece of cake....

it’s moving the hills that are a son-of-a-bitch.

by PLU Tim on Apr 27, 2008 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Killer for my fantasy team.

I’ve got both Shields and Beckett

Hmm... Needs more Bonds.

by Double06 on Apr 27, 2008 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's always pretty shitty there.

I do like Cleveland, but I admit the weather there is just as unpredictable as it is here in Seattle.

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

1 Down 26 to go

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:11 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

:(

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Damn there goes the no-no

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:12 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

woo 2 outs

Hmm... Needs more Bonds.

by Double06 on Apr 27, 2008 1:13 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Things I like:

DP.

Things I don’t like:

Perfect games being broken up early on Felix Day.

Beware of the GTE.

by EnglishMariner on Apr 27, 2008 1:14 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I wish....

all of our pitchers could develop a skill that made all batted balls go to Beltre.

by PLU Tim on Apr 27, 2008 1:14 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

If you removed all the other fielders

every batted ball would be Beltre’s eventually.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yahoo has recently changed their box scores to be sweet

Instead of saying Ground Outs, Fly Outs they now say Ground Balls, Fly Balls.

by Fett42 on Apr 27, 2008 1:15 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Barrel-chested?

I prefer keg-abdomen’d as a description of Cupcakes

by Graham on Apr 27, 2008 1:16 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Pezzer!!

Hmm... Needs more Bonds.

by Double06 on Apr 27, 2008 1:17 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

AHAHAHAHA

Beware of the GTE.

by EnglishMariner on Apr 27, 2008 1:17 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

CUAT

Beware of the GTE.

by EnglishMariner on Apr 27, 2008 1:17 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Raul would have got that one.

Midnight Baseball - No Lights - Only in Alaska!

by MfaninAlaska on Apr 27, 2008 1:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Easily

good God Cust is the slowest motherfucker in the stadium.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Doubles...

are for #6 hitters. Lopez needs to know his role as a #2 hitter and draw walks…

by PLU Tim on Apr 27, 2008 1:19 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

If he's not sac bunting

I don’t think he knows what to do with himself

by thenatural on Apr 27, 2008 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think his role as a #2

Is to either move Ichiro up or drive him in, but get on base.

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No matter how bad out OF defense is

at least we dont have Sweeney in CF and Cust in RF

by thenatural on Apr 27, 2008 1:19 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Yeah really

I thought Beane was supposed to be smart

by marinator on Apr 27, 2008 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

but why???

productive outs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

by thenatural on Apr 27, 2008 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

BELTRE!!

Hmm... Needs more Bonds.

by Double06 on Apr 27, 2008 1:22 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

BELTRE!!!!!!

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:22 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Well we're winning this game

Felix doesn’t need many more runs than this today

by marinator on Apr 27, 2008 1:22 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Hope so

Cause I have no confidence we’ll score anymore, yet alone get a hit.

by Slica on Apr 27, 2008 1:24 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Beltre!

This delay is killing me

by thenatural on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Run Scored. Game Over.

I fucking hate you Mariners

by kentroyals5 on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

who needs broussard?

we have norton

http://seattlesportsmaniac.blogspot.com

by LantermanC on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Beltre + Norton!

Our Manny + Ortiz combo!

by JLC on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I hope this is sayonara Pepe

Please don’t give him enough AB’s for his option to vest

by marinator on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

woot!

norton!

F off vidro.

by deacvision7 on Apr 27, 2008 1:23 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I am glad Norton is a veteran

Or he would have never been given a second chance by Mac

by vkut79 on Apr 27, 2008 1:24 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

And RF/DH

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Big Whiff

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:27 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Is Thomas better than Norton at this point?

Perhaps the Big Hurt is finished after all

by marinator on Apr 27, 2008 1:27 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Oh Man...Felix

I fucking hate you Mariners

by kentroyals5 on Apr 27, 2008 1:28 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Fuck yeah

Clement for DH

by Fett42 on Apr 27, 2008 1:28 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

KK

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:28 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

KKK...

lol

At least we don't have Zito's contract.

by ColeFitz on Apr 27, 2008 1:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

WOWOWOW

I fucking hate you Mariners

by kentroyals5 on Apr 27, 2008 1:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

HOLY SHIT

AWESOME!!!!!!!!

by BrianL on Apr 27, 2008 1:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Woah

That was fucking wicked.

I’m going nowhere for the next 2 hours

by marinator on Apr 27, 2008 1:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Oh my god

How is this not illegal?

by JLC on Apr 27, 2008 1:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Quit trying, Oakland

It’s not becoming.

by Jeff on Apr 27, 2008 1:30 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Holy crap.

Felix day. Man. Nothing like it. Nothing at all.

"Ever tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett http://mvn.com/milb-mariners/

by JY on Apr 27, 2008 1:30 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

HOLY SHIT

STRUCK OUT THE SIDE!!! FELIX IS NOW TRUELY ONE OF THE ELITE! JUST 1 PITCH TOO MANY OF A 9 PITCH INNING.

by Fin on Apr 27, 2008 1:30 PM PDT