As Brad Pitt goes, so go the Mariners
In AK1984's diary about what else happened in 1995, the M's greatest season, it came up that both "12 Monkeys" and "Se7ven" came out that year. "Pretty damn good year for Brad Pitt," I thought to myself. Then, hmmmmm, let's examine this some more:
1991 - M's break .500 for the first time, Brad Pitt breaks out to the public in a supporting role in "Thelma and Louise"
1995 - As mentioned before, best year for both.
1996 - Not much happens for either
1997 - M's make playoffs but lose decisively in first round. Brad Pitt stars in "Devil's Own" with Harrison Ford. Both are promising at the beginning, but fizzle in the end.
1998 - M's losing record; Pitt, "Meet Joe Black" ugh.
1999 - Pitt stars in "Fight Club", another hint of greatness to come. M's still lose, but sign Olerud, Javier, McLemore, and Snelling
2000 - M's make playoffs, Brad Pitt marries Jennifer Aniston.
2001- M's historic season, extremely entertaining for all their fans, but no big prize at the end. Pitt stars in two very entertaining movies, "Ocean's 11" and "Spy Game", but neither are Oscar-bait, so no big prize at the end.
2002/2003 - M's have winning years, but no playoffs. Pitt appears in "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind", a pretty good but not great movie.
2004 - M's go 63-99, their worst year since 1983. Pitt stars in "Troy" and "Ocean's 12" -- double ugh.
2005 - Not much better for either.
2006 - M's go 78-84, showing improvement. Brad Pitt produces and stars in "Babel", an improvement over his movies of the past few years.
2007 - M's break through and win 88 games. Pitt acclaimed in "The Assassination of Jesse James...", and "Ocean's 13" is, at least, better than "Ocean's 12"
So the big question, what's up for Pitt in 2008? Tidings are good, Mariner Fans! Pitt has two films scheduled to release this year: "Burn After Reading", by the Oscar-winning Coen brothers, co-starting Oscar winners George Clooney, Tilda Swinton, and Frances McDormand. Also "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", directed by David Fincher ("Se7en", "Fight Club"), co-starring Oscar winners Cate Blanchett and Tilda Swinton (again). So, Mariner Fans, make sure your October is clear....
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Comments
Plus, isn't Brad Pitt supposed to marry
That must mean the M's are gonna win it all, regardless of the movies Pitt makes.
I don't know if you consider it a good thing
Yes she is the naked dragon hotness, but something tells me this parallel will only set Brad and the Mariners up for an ultimate humiliation (Bedard tearing his groin, Felix having his passport revoked by Chavez on a visit home, being destroyed by the surprising Orioles in the ALDS, stuck with ten kids on an ashram in Cambodia while your wife's sex tape with Wilmer Valderama is leaked on the internet).
by Jordan of Boise on Mar 7, 2008 10:47 AM PST up reply actions
I agree with Jordan,,,
by edgar is good on Mar 7, 2008 10:52 AM PST up reply actions
Does not compute
She is not, you are correct.
This is the strangest research even on this site.
Nothing's funnier than math humor
by pdb on Mar 7, 2008 2:37 PM PST up reply actions
That's acute thought.
It's what divides us as a people.
hmm, Graham might know,
If you ever call my phone
Just so you know.
you can't know that.
That's a distinct probability.
When you integrate math humor into
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on Mar 7, 2008 8:56 PM PST up reply actions
P.S
by Last Fan Of Jose Lopez on Mar 7, 2008 8:57 PM PST up reply actions
You're right.
If you draw up the paperwork
by Jeff Sullivan on Mar 7, 2008 9:26 PM PST up reply actions
okay, that one made me laugh
by pdb on Mar 7, 2008 9:35 PM PST up reply actions
Jeff hits all the right angles sumtimes.
I Liked Troy
by TheMarinator on Mar 7, 2008 11:33 AM PST reply actions
Troy inspired my wife and I to reread the Illiad
Actually
behind the offensive line...
Graham Bell?
by TheMarinator on Mar 7, 2008 3:38 PM PST up reply actions
I live one block away from ours.
Paint Me A Skeptic
that's why...
You have no sense of humor.
by pdb on Mar 7, 2008 1:07 PM PST up reply actions
Clearly you've never read this:
Pitt's best film was in 1993*
But, they did draft A-Rod that year, so that's something.
* True Romance.
A bunch of movies missing, some good
- A River Runs Through It (one of the best)
- Interview with the Vampire & Legends of the Fall (both hits with the ladies, I believe, though generally not very good)
- Sleepers (pretty darn good, as I recall)
- Snatch (definitely top 3)
by The Alaskan on Mar 7, 2008 3:35 PM PST reply actions
Say what?!
by edgar is good on Mar 7, 2008 4:04 PM PST up reply actions
Oh, was that humorous?
by The Alaskan on Mar 10, 2008 9:24 AM PDT up reply actions

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