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2008 In A Nutshell

You will often hear of a certain event or game that it captured the spirit of an entire season on its own. Today I ask you, the reader, to choose the event that best illustrates everything the 2008 Seattle Mariners were all about. The event that best epitomizes the anguish, the humiliation, and the occasional hilarity of a season gone to waste. There are many candidates, but there can be but a single nutshell, so choose wisely, and take your time. For this is pretty much the most important ballot of the year.

WARNING: many many .gifs to follow. Upon clicking through, please allow time for the images to load. View the images before voting.

Star-divide

A

Lowewp_medium

B

Hamiltonhr_medium

C

Felixhurt_medium

D

Spanrobbed_medium

E

Hunterrobbed_medium

F

Woodsslip_medium

G

Yuniout_medium

H

Autostrike2wv0_medium

I

Williehurt_medium

J

Vidroself2_medium

K

Raulfalls_medium

L

Richmond_medium

M

Perlozzocrazy_medium

N

28akex2_jpg_medium

O

Badangle_medium

 

Poll
2008 Seattle Mariners in a nutshell:
A (Lowe wild pitch)
9 votes
B (Hamilton homer)
33 votes
C (Felix hurt)
72 votes
D (Beltre robbed)
43 votes
E (Sexson robbed)
30 votes
F (Woods trips)
21 votes
G (Yuni out at home)
23 votes
H (Auto strike)
34 votes
I (Willie hurt)
26 votes
J (Vidro hits self)
107 votes
K (Raul falls)
36 votes
L (Brawl)
29 votes
M (Perlozzo flips out)
3 votes
N (Lawn dart)
160 votes
O (Bad angle)
67 votes
Other (please describe in the comments; I may be forgetting a few)
6 votes

699 votes | Poll has closed

6 recs  |  Comment 108 comments

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Comments

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It took a while to load all of those...

It was worth it though.

BOOYA! You got Slurved!

by Slurvey on Oct 8, 2008 7:18 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Man, tough call.

I think “O (Bad angle)” is the most metaphorical though. This team couldn’t keep up with anything.

by ThundaPC on Oct 8, 2008 7:20 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Lawn Darts shows how inept we were.

However, for me the season ended the 2nd game of the year when Hamilton crushed JJ and our season. That is what I might have chosen.

by Sec 108 on Oct 8, 2008 7:21 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I voted for O

as the perfect metaphor – charge the season and then OOPS!

by seattlebruin on Oct 8, 2008 7:22 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

The Sexson homer getting robbed just pissed me off.

I voted C it shows no matter what we do right we’ll just end up losing in someway after that. I hate you mets…

BOOYA! You got Slurved!

by Slurvey on Oct 8, 2008 7:27 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I love how K-Rod points to the air like it's a routine popup

thank god someone will probably pay him a shitload of money and he’ll regress. Hopefully it will be the Angels

by basebliman on Oct 9, 2008 10:52 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I voted F

Maybe because I haven’t seen it before and it made me laugh the most, but falling over right from the start was exactly what the ‘08 M’s were all about. Felix getting hurt is more of a representation of Seattle sports in general to me.

On a related note, I or M would work great for the Angels’ year (or A for the Mets’ last two)…

by Crystal for DH on Oct 8, 2008 7:32 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I vote F

It epitomizes the epic fail at even the simplest tasks that was Seattle ’08

by mariners124m on Oct 8, 2008 7:52 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

To me

Lawn Dart perfectly conveys the comical ineptitude of this team.

by BrianL on Oct 8, 2008 7:56 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Lawn dart is the funniest,

and that’s how I voted. Although now that I think about it ‘bad angle’ really does sum up the 2008 season best.

by brayden04 on Oct 8, 2008 8:01 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No gif can describe it

P. Miguel Cairo makes the team (bringing a knife to a gun fight).

by Tony S on Oct 8, 2008 8:04 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Stop posting gifs in this thread

It’s breaking my internet

Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org

by I'm NOT Corco on Oct 8, 2008 8:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm running FF3 on a brand new 2.6 gig mac

and it’s still taking this page about two minutes to fully load.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on Oct 8, 2008 9:02 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Not saying I don't like it

just defending those with older machines.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on Oct 8, 2008 9:02 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It does take an awful long time

hence the warning. It’s just a one-time thing, though, and I think it’s worth the trouble. I love most of these.

by Jeff Sullivan on Oct 8, 2008 9:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yeah, they're all pretty awesome

or depressing, I can’t figure which.

Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.

by pdb on Oct 8, 2008 9:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yep, about 2 minutes is about what it took for me to load.

And I’m on a machine that’s almost 5 years old with FF3. Although once it loads and is stored in cache, I’m able to come back to it and it loads instantly, provided I don’t close the browser.

With that said, I’m going with B. JJ’s season is a pretty good example of the Mariners season as a whole. Came in with high expectations, and failed them. In this instance he failed them spectacularly.

God, I was at that game too. It was freezing and it was horrible.

by Goose on Oct 8, 2008 9:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

That is number 2 for me.

I’m pretty sure Brett was standing next to me when that happened. That place got quiet real fast.

by Sec 108 on Oct 9, 2008 9:02 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm using the most recent build of FF3

Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org

by I'm NOT Corco on Oct 8, 2008 9:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

New computer? Defrag? Faster connection?

This post is definitely intense, but a trip to McDonald’s is excessive.

by Teej on Oct 8, 2008 11:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

O

Seeing the ball roll for a few seconds then watching Raul shoot by arms flailing is classic.

Perfectly encapsulates the fail of 08.

by Will Kier on Oct 8, 2008 8:11 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Vote for I

3 events happened in this clip which can be seen to sum up our season. First, the M’s tried to do well (WFB running hard). Second, the M’s failed (WFB getting called out). Third, the team imploded (WFB collapsing in pain).

by Scrupio on Oct 8, 2008 8:20 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I'd be hard pressed not to choose N

seeing as I was at the game and all… damn it, Raul >:(

by ningwers on Oct 8, 2008 8:20 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Though other moments were more memorable

I voted for K not just because it was an appropriate representation of this season but, quite appropriately, there’s a WaMu logo in the background, making it a multilayered illustration of fail.

by Gomez on Oct 8, 2008 8:46 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Also

After these multiple GIFs on one page tried to BSOD my computer, I was smart enough to hit ESC when reloading the page.

by Gomez on Oct 8, 2008 8:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm voting for H because it loaded

Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org

by I'm NOT Corco on Oct 8, 2008 8:48 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Sexson is such a bitch.

I mean seriously, who fights like that? What a fucking wimp.

by brayden04 on Oct 8, 2008 8:50 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

J must be the choice..

Raul’s were hilarious, but I cant use a Raul gif to sum up the failures of this season cause Raul was a beast with the bat.

And the robbery of home runs and getting thrown out at the plate indicates metaphorically that we were close to success but have bad luck or were just an inch short of success. That obviously wasn the case.

The Vidro gif sums up the yr. Pathetic veteran hitting himself in the face chasing a bad pitch.

by DarkLou on Oct 8, 2008 9:11 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

A vote for Option J here too.

Vidro was unable to hit anything but his own face. It’s so poetically apt. The Mariners season in a nutshell.

B.J. Upton's new nickname = "Laggard McShambleslow"

by esoteric on Oct 8, 2008 9:30 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I voted for G.

Because Yuni fails at everything and our team was as ridiculous as his slide.

by Mariner John on Oct 8, 2008 10:17 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I voted for Lawn Dart.

Early season hopes of being at least respectable being embarrassingly thrown into the ground. I’m pretty sure that was the exact point where I realized that this team was terrible and nothing could be done to salvage the season.

54!

by joof on Oct 8, 2008 10:40 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

C

Because for every good thing that happened this season, it was immediately followed by garbage. That was 2008.

by Matthew on Oct 8, 2008 11:14 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I'm going with auto strike.

In encapsulates the inevitable futility of the year. From another angle, it suggests that at some point, even Gameday decided it didn’t give a shit.

by Paytheline on Oct 8, 2008 11:28 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Lawn Dart

And not just because it’s probably the funniest gif I’ve ever seen.

This season began in the heat of a long-running argument about the Bedard trade. With a record payroll and expectations as high as they’d been since 2002 or 2003.
The suddenness, the comprehensiveness and the…creativeness of the ineptitude this season was something I don’t think I’ve seen before. For those of us that don’t have to write about this shit every day, there really was something fascinating in this season, like the music of The Shaggs or other outsider art.

All of this is summed up in that magisterial “throw.” The argument about LF defense, the expectation of a close play, the can’t-turn-away beauty of a play so terribly NEW. Once this season was lost, and you can argue that happened in April, most of us were tuning in (if we did) simply to see how bad it was going to get. Raul Ibanez showed us that this question can never really be answered in his interpretive dance entitled “There is no floor.”

by marc w on Oct 8, 2008 11:38 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

N

Because it everything seems to be looking positive…Raul actual plays the carom…but then it turns to major failure extremely fast.

by SethGrandpa on Oct 8, 2008 11:50 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I also need this explained.

Bring back José Cruz Jr!

by darmok on Oct 9, 2008 9:09 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I have no idea what happened there, either, but I voted for it.

Getting called out on an automatic strike generally involves failing utterly to play the game. Like refusing to step in the batters box.

I don’t know what happened this time, but regardless it’s the best way to sum up our season.

I like using semi-colons; they make me feel smart.

by Llewdor on Oct 9, 2008 9:33 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Voted D

The look on Beltre’s face sums everything up for me.

by Smegmalicious on Oct 9, 2008 12:25 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Has to be lawn dart

Seeing that IN PERSON was one of the greatest moments of my life. I knew ‘this is why I am a Ms fan.’

Then again, I also saw the Lowe wild pitch in person too……..

I should either NEVER go to another M’s game, or go to ALL of them.

by Limerickx on Oct 9, 2008 6:23 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I went with J.

This team kept screwing itself over again and again.

But for some reason, I can watch F continuously. Seriously, how the hell does one fall like that?

by NOLAmarinergirl on Oct 9, 2008 7:07 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

G had the most complete metaphor for the organization’s expectations and results: Yuni expects to score but instead runs face first into a shin guard.

I also liked K (Raul falls down) for the subtle irony of the giant WaMu sign in the background of the shot.

by MrIncognito on Oct 9, 2008 7:14 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I voted Lawn Dart because

it looks like the ball explodes when the Yes graphic comes up. That just typifies the season for me.

Be open minded about what you don't know.

by Jed MC on Oct 9, 2008 8:39 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Notably absent from this list is Ichiro

“Ichiro hurts his team by not failing spectacularly thereby preventing us from landing Strasburg!”

by PDXTai on Oct 9, 2008 8:41 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

K

Finding new and inventive ways to loose AND a giant WaMu banner in the background sums up the season for me.

The Felix getting injured clip was too painful.

by DoesntCompute on Oct 9, 2008 8:59 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

E - Sexson getting robbed

Really represents the futility of the year. And damn it, we all wanted Richie to succeed. He hit it and it looked like it was out. They were going to beat the angels. Then start winning a bunch and take first place and make the playoffs and win their first world series and it was going to be an awesome season. Then Torii Hunter ruined my goddamned birthday.

Bring back José Cruz Jr!

by darmok on Oct 9, 2008 9:18 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

This was my 2nd choice

Man, was that a punch in the stomach.

by Gomez on Oct 9, 2008 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Good God.

That game was the last instance of GTE up until Felix got injured, wasn’t it?

by BrianL on Oct 9, 2008 11:17 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well is GTE only GTE when it's angry?

Because positive GTE counts then the Felix Slam would’ve been the next GTE by a matter of moments.

by SethGrandpa on Oct 9, 2008 12:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I voted "other"

The play that made me laugh the most was against Toronto in the Skydome. A Jay hit a stinger off the RF wall and Reed played it perfectly and made a pretty good throw to the cut-off man, Richie Sexson. Sexson seemed to be inspired and he did a little spin and threw the ball almost directly on the dirt towards the catcher. Dave Sims’ call was perfect: “Richie tries to use the turf to get the ball home!” I laughed for a good five minutes.

Cuba Si! Yanqi No!

by Patrick517 on Oct 9, 2008 12:20 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I have to go with K for one simple reason

The Mariners couldn’t even go backwards (1st overall pick) correctly, just like Raul

Raben died for your sins.

by rlintott on Oct 9, 2008 12:43 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I like to think

that someone had to restrain Rick Rizzs from running onto the field and wrapping up Willie in his arms when “I” happened.

by BrianL on Oct 9, 2008 1:19 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

This thread is incredibly cathartic

MORE PLEASE. My misery, I will truly wallow in it.

by Lents Park Homer on Oct 9, 2008 2:14 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Bedard MIA

I think the winner should be something involving him. Say what you will but he was a letdown.

has anyone sent this to failblog?

by vj on Oct 9, 2008 2:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Had to go with Perlozzo (which surprisingly has the least amount of votes).

That man summed up this team’s frustration when he flipped out. All he needed to do was knock the umpire on his ass and it would’ve been perfect.

by Wilder. on Oct 9, 2008 2:40 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Lawn dart for me

Vidro hitting himself is also an acceptable way to look at things. For too long this season, management allowed players to try to fill roles they had no business in based on reputation and history, not objective evaluation.

by SkipT on Oct 9, 2008 4:04 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

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