OFFTOP 10.13.08 Garfield Edition
I'm not usually one for a case of the Mondays, but it's only 8.49am and I'm already set to climb back into bed and hide from the world. I couldn't wake up with my first alarm and then the second did not sing at the appropriate time. My shuffle was dead, forcing me to listen to thumping baselines as I scooted along. Water from residents oversoaking their balcony plants drenched me as I rode through the French Quarter. Upon opening my scooter seat, I found that red beans and rice had leaked all over my bag (including my new 80-count box of tea). As I hustled to make the six block walk, a cop stopped me to lecture me about riding on the sidewalk, causing me to clutch my dripping bag to my almost-new fleece, which will cause me to smell like chipotle for the rest of the day. And then, upon checking my email, yay--two new job rejections!
Please, give me some good news, or at least tell me of your worst Monday horror stories.
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Not only is it Monday, which is bad in and of itself...
it is also Columbus Day doubling the shittiness.
All I can say is that, not unlike Janette Rankin who famously chimed “I love my country but I cannot vote for war”, I myself love my Phillies but I cannot root for Joe Blanton.
Cuba Si! Yanqi No!
I don't have any Monday stories...
everyday is the same to me. Most of the time I don’t know what day of the week it is until I check LL and see the OFFTOP. I haven’t figured out if this is awesome or sad.
Sometimes it sucks
Like today when I read the Sunday train schedule and got on the wrong train for 30 minutes. I was busy reading a book I had just bought. Luckily my teammate says, “I can’t believe we’re still underground.” Then I realized it wasn’t Sunday :(
I would like to live in a world in which Mondays do not matter.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 8:06 AM PDT up reply actions
Uhhhhh...good news?
I don’t have any BAD news, but I’m afraid I can’t offer much good news – except to offer the quite possibly naïve assertion that the worst may, in fact, be behind you; that you’ve front-loaded all the crap from today into one hour and now it’s smooth sailing.
And honestly, job rejections are OK – at least you heard something. In my last bout with unemployment, I sent out about two to three resumes a day for about four weeks, and got exactly ONE response – the rest just vanished.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Did you know that Garfield is funnier without Garfield?
It’s the Garfield comic, and all that’s done is Garfield is completely taken out. It’s hilarious.
Other kids may be sayin' hi-ho, but The Gooch just says yo.
Wow that was really strange.
The nostalgia was very enjoyable.
Does your sock pupped understand you too, John?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:16 AM PDT up reply actions
My sock pupped 6 little ankle socks... it was the miracle of life
but I wish she hadn’t done it on my bed… now there’s blood and placenta stains on my sheets.
by johnbai on Oct 13, 2008 10:25 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
The tea has been saved.
Inside the box were eight individually wrapped cellophane packages.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 8:10 AM PDT reply actions
oh and by the way nola
nice color scheme.
(I don’t really know what color scheme you’re referring to but I like to obey the tags when possible)
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
It goes with the sc tag.
But thank you for obeying the tags.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 8:19 AM PDT up reply actions
I do what I can to make the world a better place
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I'm sick, it sucks
except the part where I’m in the OTFPOTD from my bed
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 10:52 AM PDT up reply actions
Somehow, I have no tea at home
I just realized this about ten minutes ago
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions
Sucks.
My box at work is a little stale-ish, but I’m just finishing T2, and about to grab T3 before lunch. Seems to be de-fogging my brain a little bit…
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions
but oddly doesn't taste good steeped in hot water.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
You know what's incredibly annoying
is riding your bike to work and forgetting to pack work socks. So now I’ve got the dress shirt, black trousers, black shoes, and white socks combo going. sah-weeeeeeeet.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
And I would judge you harshly for this, also.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 8:22 AM PDT up reply actions
As well you should.
Macy’s opens in a half hour, and I will be there when the doors open. This is unacceptable.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
The realization that I forgot socks hit me halfway to work
but since “halfway to work” means “at the bottom of a really big damn hill that I don’t want to ride up again” I just kept going.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Too much work
both in the application and in the removal.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
It's the look of a new generation.
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 8:27 AM PDT up reply actions
It's the look of Elvis Costello
but he never did it with dress trousers and wing tips. He was more of a jeans/docs kinda guy.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
So that Poltergeist DirecTV commercial
has the funniest disclaimer ever. At the bottom of the screen, when all the crazy ghost rays start flying out of the TV, in small print it says “NOT INTENDED TO DEPICT ACTUAL VIEWING EXPERIENCE”.
Which is disappointing, because I really thought DirecTV would be my source for supernatural portals; now I gotta find another one.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I'm sick of how often it's getting shown.
Companies need to learn that after about 10 viewings of the same ad within a 2-day period, I will hate whatever they are selling. Geico does a brilliant job of mixing it up.
I'm pretty tired of it too
The concept is great, but rotate them around a bit. The Geico ads are just unbelievably odd.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I never said I like Garfield.
I wish for this
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 8:54 AM PDT up reply actions
I do; it's Calvin and Hobbes.
Or do you just not know what that looks like?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:04 AM PDT up reply actions
I don't see an image either
and I know what C&H look like.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Frenchman.
Mon ostie de saint-sacrament de câlice de crisse!
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:09 PM PDT up reply actions
I know how it goes
Here is what cheered me up :)
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3640890
I can only hope something like this happens to me today.
Well not the broken pinky. But an uncrushing.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 9:10 AM PDT up reply actions
Y'all know me so incredibly well.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:49 AM PDT up reply actions
Be that as it may it's still fun live.
I don’t actually sit and watch a game on tv.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:10 AM PDT up reply actions
I don't actually watch the NBA much
but I find the theory of watching it far less irritating than the theory of watching the NFL.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Imagine how popular he would be if he were actually good
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 11:09 AM PDT up reply actions
My comment should be construed as sarcasm
since I’m already on record saying how much I love Chris Paul
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 11:19 AM PDT up reply actions
I'm more envious of the fact that you get to spend this horrible Monday in bed.
And cruel for reinforcing that fact.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions
You know what sucks...
Using up the remaining vacation days so that you can move. And then catching a cold in the process. And having to come back to work after having missed a week to put out the fires that cropped up when you were gone…
I’ve got a massive cold and I’m having to try and figure out how to fix a broken SQL/ASP app first thing. Nevermind the fact that I lost about 20 hours of sleep last week as well.
T=1 It’ll probably be much, much higher by noon…
This signature space for rent.
Man, and I thought waking up sucked.
Sorry to hear you’re going through all of that!
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
but I now have black socks on
so things are looking up.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I couldn't find my black socks even if I tried...
Of course, I normally wear white socks with my black shoes, which drives a lot of people crazy. But my feet pretty much hide in my cubicle all day so I don’t really care much either.
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 10:09 AM PDT up reply actions
As long as we're doing comics...
Random Wondermark of the day!

Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
I know I said last week that I don't like internationals
But I probably like them better than Chris Iwelumo does.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Do you like them more than Ashley Cole does?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 9:41 AM PDT up reply actions
I like nothing about Ashley Cole
I don’t often hold grudges against athletes that move teams, but for some reason I want Ashley Cole to step on a sprinklerhead in training and rip his ankle to shreds.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Well this sentiment made my day better.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 9:48 AM PDT up reply actions
I know, I'm sorry
From now on, it’s all sunshine and kittens.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
That wasn't sarcasm.
You think I’m an Ashley Cole fan?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 9:54 AM PDT up reply actions
Didn't think so
but I know you’ve been having a bad morning and the general sentiment was at odds with your desire to have a better day. Overthink? Me? What?
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Creative depictions of what should happen to Efootballers on opposing teams are welcomed and encouraged
As opposed to information regarding Afootball players broken digits.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 9:59 AM PDT up reply actions
People always talk about how macho football players are
Romo’s out with a broken pinky? Diddums. Buddy-tape it and get back out there, you wuss.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
That's a horrible morning
In happier news, t-148 minutes until I ask my first girl out for coffee without doing it via the internet in over 3 years
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Good luck.
Remember: don’t overthink it. Just do it.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
This is the plan
I figure it’ll be easier if I generate a completely unrelated conversation and then segue into said situation
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I'm trying to debate if this is the best or the worst idea I've ever heard
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Urbandictionary settled that
As much as I would like to do t his
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Given that she may not get it
It’s pretty hilarious
I’ll take the safe route
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Remember the joke arguement Jeff and I had?
I used some of those lines while breaking up with a GF because I was getting bored with the argument.
Just don't force the clever and witty
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
We all know what happens when I try to force clever and witty
It fails miserably
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
It fails for most people when forced, actually
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
How do you force wit?
And if you did, wouldn’t that be a good thing?
You force wit by being in an uncomfortable position and trying to be funny
despite the fact that the situation may not call for funny, but merely for genial, in order to appeal to someone. And it’s not a good thing. Look at any politician that tries to be funny – it NEVER works. (NO POLITICS – that’s just a generic example)
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I guess I would call that trying to be witty and failing.
To me, forcing wit implies that you were at least successful at being witty.
I'd say get away from campus.
Too many people pausing by those tables and saying hello.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:25 AM PDT up reply actions
That's what I was thinking
That leaves one technical dillemma though- she’s off campus and h as no car. Do I offer to pick her up or just expect her to appear at the coffeehouse?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
You most definitely offer to pick her up.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:27 AM PDT up reply actions
It makes it seem more like a real date with the pickup
Which makes things a bit more formal
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Bah, I've never been one to pay much attention to society's "rules" on dates.
You picking her up would just be you being a nice guy.
The pick-up makes things more formal
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Yes, but if she doesn't have a car, then it's necessary.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:28 AM PDT up reply actions
Or it could be a meet there and he offers a ride home situation
which strikes a good balance between formal and not.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
That's what I was thinking
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
As long as she has a way to get there.
If she lives in walkable distance to a coffee shop, go there.
And make it more like 5:30pm.
Then if it works out dinner, and then drive her home.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:30 AM PDT up reply actions
coffee then dinner?
Is that ethical?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
More ethical than coffee then offering to drive her home.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:31 AM PDT up reply actions
Given that you are a female
and I’m having trouble looking at this objectively/rationally I’ll assume you’re right
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Wait should I just give her one of my cars during class so she can meet me there?
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
actually no
I’m having trouble looking at this rationally but even I know there’s no reason to do that
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Yeah, that sends a very needy/desperate vibe
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
nononononono
remember I am the voice of reason here.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:49 AM PDT up reply actions
I'm going to shoot for sometime this evening
or tomorrow evening
like 7 or 8 ish
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
What time is a good time then?
I always thought dinner was 5-6
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
It's a very interesting phenomenon.
Go to a restaurant at 5.30 and notice the age of the crowd. They’ll all be older than your parents.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I've never been to a restaurant much after 5:30
My Dad always insisted we eat sometime between 430 and 530
And yeah, there are lots of old people
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I'm going to be so fucking hungry if I don't eat dinner until 7 or 8 tonight
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Ice cream is always a delicious backup plan
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I'm not going all the way to Renton
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
You honestly think a good date is a trip to Fry's?
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Actually, this could explain even more.
Do you think this?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:25 AM PDT up reply actions
Brayden, don't take this the wrong way, but
WRONG
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 6:54 PM PDT up reply actions
Haha
I didn’t take it badly, it made me laugh. Ok, with every girl there are going to be better/worse places for a first date. If a baseball game is a good place for a first date with a girl, then that’s awesome and that girl is awesome. But I think for the majority of girls a baseball game is not a good place for a first date.
I think it takes quite a bit to offend me
I mean, where you have meetings and such I have people screaming obscenities at me. So I’m kinda used to it.
Ha.
I think one of the funniest heckles (what’s the word for this?) I’ve ever received was in Provo, Utah. I was playing a game there and someone in the stands yelled, “Hey 24, they don’t get any sun in Seattle do they??”
I looked into the stands and everyone there was lighter skin than me. I honestly wasn’t sure how to react.
You know what's a great place for a first date?
Jazz Alley.
No.
Any place that inhibits conversation is a bad place for a first date. Jazz Alley would be a perfectly fine 2nd or 3rd date.
Chuck Mangione was playing.
My date and I were too busy reveling in his ability to effortlessly hit a note twenty lines above the staff. We just muttered “wow” every few minutes.
Despite that, we managed to stick together for a while.
We had so much fun it spawned a second date shortly afterwords.
Yes.
Her uncle worked at a propane retailer. Never approved of my hippie music.
"Dad, can I get a gun rack for my bike?"
“Bobby, if you weren’t my son I’d hug you.”
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms. t going well.
One of the biggest things I miss about Olympia is being able to pick this up whenever I want:

J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions
There used to be a Dancing Goats Cafe on 4th and Washington in downtown Oly that had a mural of that on the outside wall.
Still the best coffee I’ve ever had.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 11:59 AM PDT up reply actions
You can download their coffee reports.
Oh goodness me I want to be a person who treks to the highlands to sample coffee beans.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:02 PM PDT up reply actions
That would be a pretty awesome job.
Assuming you didn’t work for the people that pull their coffee beans out of jungle cat stool.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Aren't those supposed to be the most tasty, though?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:04 PM PDT up reply actions
There's a limit to how far I'll go to enjoy the best.
Anything that comes out of something’s butt is most assuredly over the line.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:05 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm going to have to try this.
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 12:08 PM PDT up reply actions
It's fantastic.
Definitely Batdorf’s best blend by a damn sight.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:10 PM PDT up reply actions
Starbucks doens't have Mountain Dew.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:32 AM PDT up reply actions
Coming to a close
I just need to find someplace that sells that Tropicana Twister in 6 1-liter packs
Nothing you say ever surprises me.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions
My fifth grade or your fifth grade?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:06 AM PDT up reply actions
Note to Robert
there’s no need to answer this.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
But I've seen her drink coffee before
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Corco's off
40% chance I ask and she says yes
35% I chicken out
25% I ask and she says no
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Don't chicken off, go for it
good luck…
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Corfailed
I didn’t even do it-
I’m going to wait until a natural conversation develops towards the end of class which happens sometimes anyway so no worries there
The thing is I have to walk out of the room at roughly the same time as her or I’m either chasing her or awkwardly waiting for her and she packs a bunch of shit and I travel light so there was no way to succeed
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Oh yeah that's the plan
Believe it or not you guys are not my primary consults here
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
You are consulting too many people.
Just ask her and be done with it.
Right
That’s why I bailed today
I made myself too nervous by over-consulting
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
No, see how these are not the same thing?
“Just ask her and be done with it.”
“That’s why I bailed today”
I guess that was more in response to "You are consulting too many people"
I need to sit back and think about this rationally
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
We generally cross paths at 9:25ish on Tuesday mornings
I’ll do it then
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
The best way to approach this is to just ask her straight out.
Like many things in life, you start thinking about this too much and that causes you to heap all this extra pressure on yourself that isn’t really there. If you wait too long and get the idea in your head that you won’t succeed, you’re effed.
Two things. First, girls aren’t idiots. They are more sensitive than guys to body language and small things that we think are inconsequential. With this in mind, she probably has an idea that you like her. Which leads to my second thing. Girls love confidence. I haven’t met a girl who didn’t like confidence. Confidence is tricky, you can’t overplay it because then it becomes arrogance. But the beautiful thing about confidence is you can fake it. And fake it long enough and eventually it becomes real.
by brayden04 on Oct 13, 2008 5:51 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Wow fail.
What that should say is isn’t this the girl who thought you were cute? Don’t chicken out, you’re in a great position!
Good luck dude.
So I just bought the new David Byrne/Brian Eno record
and it’s actually pretty good. I was a pretty big Talking Heads fan but most of David Byrne’s solo stuff was kinda meh. But this is a good record – very lush, lots of midtempo-y stuff but really well written songs and great production.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Some of my favorite Byrne stuff was his post-Talking Heads solo work
But I preferred his Uh-Oh stuff to his wanky experimental soundtrack compositions.
Yeah, this is much more Uh-Ohish
and it’s really quite good. Probably not something I’ll listen to a ton, but I do quite like it.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Eno is a fantastic producer...
I never thought I’d see the day where he’d work with someone like Paul Simon, but man the more I listen to “Surprise” the more I see how the two of them can co-exist pretty well.
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 10:59 AM PDT up reply actions
I hope you aren't using that on your lap
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
He already drinks enough mt dew to make this not an issue.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 10:50 AM PDT up reply actions
I had a high school cross-country teammate
who used to think that if he drank enough Mt. Dew that it would be an effective form of birth control. Fortunately, I dont think he ever got laid. Although it would have been great if he had ever used the line, “It’s OK baby . . . I’m on the Dew.”
by FlaskInSafeco on Oct 13, 2008 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions
I was wondering what he meant by "draw backs"
when a 200 F heat source is sitting on your lap the last thing you probably need to think about are what the drawbacks are.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Sad that this has to be explicitly stated, really
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
This exchange for some reason had me cracking up
Dude #1:What happened?
Dude #2:I was at my dealers house.
#1:Uh huh.
#2: I was buying my PCP.
#1:Of course
#2:And…uh I didn’t have enough money for all of the gallon.
#1:oooohh, it’s expensive?
#2:But I wanted the whole gallon.
#1:Of course
#2:So I set up a deal where I would leave her as collateral.
#1:Uh oh!
I'm all for making the best of this season
and ending up with Knowshon Moreno, Chris Wells, Jeremy Maclin, Michael Oher, etc.
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions
I will not stand for another goddamn season of draft hunting.
I’m standing at the 3 of the worst years ever for my teams in 2008 and all my hope resides on Alfie’s bum knee, Spezza’s stupid brain and Heatley’s awesomeness.
Thankfully the NFL draft is so unredictable
that it’s kind of pointless to project it this early. I am just expressing that should our season suck, at least we can fix a hole on the team
by seattlebruin on Oct 13, 2008 11:09 AM PDT up reply actions
This is hilarious
stronger profanity is expressed using words and expressions related to Catholicism and its liturgy.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions
English doesn't use "votive candle" or "tabernacle" in swearing.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
D'Ambo!
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:41 AM PDT up reply actions
I'm all for involving tabernacle as a swear word.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions
This is how cultural trends are born.
Let’s do it.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:04 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm trying to decide if it should be a verb, adjective or noun.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:06 PM PDT up reply actions
Count me out.
I’d appreciate my religion not being slammed, especially a hugely important part of said religion…
I even regret my earlier comment a bit, but couldn’t resist doing so at the time…
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 12:11 PM PDT up reply actions
fuck ostie.
That one’s easy to remember.
I wonder how many people speak french/quebecois in Vancouver. I got myself in a pickle last time I was there for swearing in chinese, forgetting how many people there speak chinese.
Not as many as back east
but there’s a few. You’d probably be better off swearing in a neutral language though.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Time to break out my Danish curses?
Or I could just slur into my Scottish so nobody can understand me.
I'd go with Danish
Canada being a colony and all.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Maybe I'll just mix english french and chinese into a mishmash
though I actually did enjoy the very shocked look I got when an eldery chinese woman overheard me saying unrepeatable things about goats and the ancestors of nobody in particular
SEA
HORSE!
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:10 AM PDT up reply actions
Highway run...
Into the midnight sun…
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 10:56 AM PDT reply actions
They say that the road ain't no place to start a family.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
circus life, under the big top world
we all need the clowns to OH HOLY GOD STEVE PERRY WHY DID YOU WRITE THAT LINE CLOWNS ARE NO GOOD FOR ANYBODY
(standard disclaimer about posting clown pics)
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Hmmm.
Need to add this one to the grammar nazi cache….

This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:18 AM PDT up reply actions
No kidding...
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:42 AM PDT up reply actions
You know what I could do for right now?
Snow. Lots of it.
no precipitation for 24 more hours please
I just stained my deck and it needs to finish drying.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Don't say I didn't warn you...
It’s raining here in Oly. I tried mowing my massive lawn last night, but the neighbors kept interrupting me. Got the front yard done, and stashed the mower under a tarp in the back yard. I don’t think I’ll get to finish the back yard this evening after all :-(
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions
You could have fog in Prague.
Is that good enough?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
The fog in Prague rests mainly on the log.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
by pdb on Oct 13, 2008 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
I slog in clogs upon that log, mouldering deep in blackest bog
past pens of hogs and dying dogs to the steps of the bar wherest they gape agog at a handsome frog living so far from his native gulag. I order up a Cape Cod grog.
No, I hate it when people blog about stupid stuff
like what they had for lunch or where they went for beer last night.
I'm in the same boat.
This last weekend was cold enough for me to start thinking about winter and all its wonderful amenities.
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 11:30 AM PDT up reply actions
So for an Anniversary present my wife asked for me to quit smoking
I feel completely lost today, but I refuse to fail.
Hopefully it'll get easier.
Good luck to you.
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 11:52 AM PDT up reply actions
switch to heroin
then smoking won’t seem so bad to your wife. Happy anniversary, by the way.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Which area of Seattle is "Georgetown", and why have I not heard this neighborhood?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:58 AM PDT reply actions
I actually was having a discussion about this area with Katal last night and we both agree that said area is completely pointless
Not if it gives me a job it's not.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 11:59 AM PDT up reply actions
You haven't heard of it
because it has fewer white people per capita than other neighborhoods.
Same applies for Beacon Hill.
Conversely, you have heard of Ballard, Northgate and Wallingford.
It also has few people in general
It’s pretty sparsely populated, compared to the rest of the city.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I don't know why I ask, really.
If I’m willing to commute to Tacoma I’d be willing to go pretty much anywhere within the city.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:00 PM PDT up reply actions
It is south of SoDo and north of Boeing Field.
Tends to run along Airport Way. It is an Industrial area for the most part, but it has become a growing neighborhood in recent years.
Well, I like it.
There’s a brewing company, Stellar pizza, several pubs / restaurants… if I want to go out for dinner and I’m tired of Columbia City I usually go to Georgetown.
The area I'm picturing isn't very lovely but I haven't seen much of it.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:06 PM PDT up reply actions
I have friends that live of of Corson Ave.
The city is really doing a nice job of cleaning that area up.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
Going South from Safeco its after the seedy area on 1st and before the seedy area further down on 1st
Georgetown is way further south than that.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:10 PM PDT up reply actions
It's just north of White Center.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:13 PM PDT up reply actions
Whatevs, Georgetown is bitchin'.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:15 PM PDT up reply actions
It's more northeast of South Park
But that is quibbling. The point is that Georgetown does in fact rock.
Jules Maes has the greatest bouncer in the world.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:19 PM PDT up reply actions
Jules Maes is one of my favorite bars in Seattle
I love that place, and Georgetown itself is pretty cool.
Should I put this into my cover letter?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:21 PM PDT up reply actions
I think it should be this poem by the late Steven Jessie Bernstein:
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:29 PM PDT up reply actions
(This poem is about living in Georgetown, in case that wasn't obvious.)
(Also, *Jesse)
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:33 PM PDT up reply actions
SHERRY SHERRY BABY WON'T YOU COME OUT TONIGHT
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
SHE WANTS TO TAKE IT IN HER EAR
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions
I have not listened to or read that in a long time.
I will raise a glass to Steven Jessie Bernstein tonight.
I hadn't listened to Prison for a few years, but I put it on this summer while driving back to Missoula from Glacier Park.
It’s just so damned brilliant. The line "The following is pure fiction; actually, I have been handsome and popular all my life. " is alternately the most hilarious and depressing thing I have ever heard.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:40 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm going to have to dig this out tonight, now
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Georgetown is awesome!
They have an ice cream shop that has punk rock shows, a couple really cool bars, and a really bitchin’ vegan restaurant. It’s on the shortlist of neighborhoods we’re looking at moving to this summer.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:06 PM PDT up reply actions
Ok, then, let's all cross our fingers that these people actually look at my resume this time.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:08 PM PDT up reply actions
The 9 lb Hammer is an awesome bar
and Jules Mae’s is great.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Have you not yet learned you're not meant to cook?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions
I like to think he's boiling the tortellini in Mountain Dew.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:30 PM PDT up reply actions
What on earth for?
I wonder what the boiling point of mountain dew is, anyway?
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
When I worked fast food in high school I used to pour soda on the grill when I got bored.
It was pretty fantastic.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:32 PM PDT up reply actions
What exactly happens?
Does it spark?
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
The sugar caramelizes instantly.
Soda water itself worked great to spot clean the grill, so it would do this thing where the sugar would turn into a huge, sticky, bubbling mass in the middle and the area surrounding the sugar mound would be spotlessly clean.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:35 PM PDT up reply actions
Bullshit, I got the idea from a female co-worker.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Obviously I meant good for you.
Which I realize is fairly far away along a good spectrum from the rest of us.
And no, I can’t make that sentence clear.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:54 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm confident in the knowledge I must make more money than you.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions
if not there is really no justice in this cruel and evil world
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I'd be more offended by this if I wasn't noticing who was asking.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:50 PM PDT up reply actions
You also couldn't figure out the difference between 1st Street and Alaskan Way.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
In Seattle, East-West arterials are generally Avenues, and North-South arterials are generally Streets.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions
I fear I will never udnerstand east-west and north-south again after living here.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions
This is the best part about living in Seattle.
You don’t need to understand N-S-E-W. All you need to understand is Cascades-Olympics or Lake-Sound.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
The month I spent working for a housecleaning service when I first moved here was terrible
but it was a Godsend in terms of figuring out the street networks.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:27 PM PDT up reply actions
Except depending on the neighborhood you are in
the streets don’t run on true cardinal driections, but rather are tilted by about 30°
Flip that
N-S arterials are avenues (12th Ave, 1st Ave) and E-W are streets (E Galer St, E Roy St., E John St).
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
You are in fact correct.
Whoopsies.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:28 PM PDT up reply actions
This is why I don't do compass directions.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 1:32 PM PDT up reply actions
I can navigate all over Seattle without using a street name
I mostly use bars.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I didn't even get lost and I was a small town folk in the big city
and I was terrified
by JI on Oct 13, 2008 1:15 PM PDT up reply actions
You once took a wrong turn and ended up in the wrong city.
by Graham MacAree on Oct 13, 2008 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions
*When the correct city was ~4 miles away from where you started
by Graham MacAree on Oct 13, 2008 12:52 PM PDT up reply actions
There are roads called Bel-Red for a reason.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
I always wondered that about the Eastside
are people there so challenged that their road names always have to have a destination and an origination built into them or they’ll get lost? Bel-Red, Woodinville-Duval, etc.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
It's an older method of naming roads in aggrarian areas
It looks silly that these areas are developed but when they weren’t it made plenty of sense.
The road that connects Greenfield ,OH with unincorporated Sabina 10 miles away is logically called Greenfield-Sabina Rd.
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
lolz, Erik Bedard hates Seattle
because of confusing roads haha brbr
Unfortunately I did not lock the text messages of distress
In which you wonder where on earth you are.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm looking at the text messages from that day and I don't see anything sounding the least bit distressed
I meant when you couldn't figure out Alaskan Way/1st.
And from that day you were distressed later when you tried to drink a martini.
talk about a girl.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 1:03 PM PDT up reply actions
I have gotten lost trying to find my way on Bel-Red road so many times it's not even funny.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:01 PM PDT up reply actions
Exurban street networks are so fucking stupid it's not even funny.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:03 PM PDT up reply actions
It makes more sense than urban street networks
To get from UPS to S 38th St I am on one road with three different names, Alder, Cedar, and Pine just because Ithe road has veered slightly to the left
It makes no sense
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
Talk about making NO sense whatsoever...
One of the streets I moved near seems to simultaneously run east-west AND north-south in the same vicinity. When we looked at this house the very first time, we completely got lost. And I even had a map with directions.
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 1:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Tacoma's street network is a different animal.
The city plan was changed three or four times very early in the city’s history.
Seattle’s street network is really simple, aside from the area around Greenlake.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:30 PM PDT up reply actions
Don't feel bad
I was once walking home from a friend’s house that was a quarter of a mile away and I got lost and took a good 45 minutes to get home
If you and I both agree on it it must be true
Determined, Jonesing Commentor | Proud proprietor of Washingtonhighways.org
I have eaten some dodgy foods in my day
but I think this one is right up there in the “nope, not even worth pondering” category.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Have I mentioned how you need a woman?
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:33 PM PDT up reply actions
Right about the same time that the rest of us mention that it may never happen.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Where is Broberto?
I’m concerned about the tortellini in Mt Dew.
by Kirsten Schlewitz on Oct 13, 2008 12:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Wow...
So do the requirements for being QB at Wazzu include also having to be a drummer for Spinal Tap?
This signature space for rent.
I'm a little concerned that thewyrm has been eaten by a polar bear.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
hahahahaha
http://black20.com/finds/spielberg-loves-shia
You may gain some yards on the ground, but eventually Lofa will end up biting you in the ass.
So...
Will the Dow go up 1000 points in a day? Don’t the markets close at 1:30 Seattle time?
This signature space for rent.
Ah.
So the financial adviser my wife met in the new ‘hood was correct – the Dow was due for a massive recovery very soon… I wish I would’ve had some money to throw into the market. It’s a great time to buy if you know what you’re doing.
This signature space for rent.
by PositivePaul on Oct 13, 2008 1:22 PM PDT up reply actions
I like how CNN is calling it a "stunning reversal"
well, it’s only stunning if you don’t understand the concept of “buy low”.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
My one and only stock gained almost 15% today.
I wish I could have done as I wished and sold half of my shares a year ago, because I knew the market was due to fall. The plan was to put the money in a high yield savings account, and but like crazy when the time was right. My mom was convinced I was going to spend the money on guitar stuff and refused to tell me who I needed to talk to in order to sell.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:32 PM PDT up reply actions
wait, what?
Oh yeah, baseball. If this game goes as long as Saturday’s I can watch some of it when I get home.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Normally I would be annoyed as hell about a day game during the week
but since I have today off and I’m going out for my girlfriend’s birthday tonight, this is the only way I can watch the game.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:35 PM PDT up reply actions
Sun Liquor for a drink at happy hour, Stumbling Monk for a beer or two, Kingfish Cafe for fried green tomatoes, red beans and rice and fried chicken.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:36 PM PDT up reply actions
Considering how well the present I bought her went over I could probably take her to KFC and buy a bottle of Boone's and call it good.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:43 PM PDT up reply actions
You of course realize that I have to ask what the present was now
but if you don’t feel like sharing that’s cool.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
iPod Nano.
The added benefit is that I get to use mine again.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:46 PM PDT up reply actions
awesome. It's good when everybody wins.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
It's so damned hard to get in there, but well worth the wait.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
Been a while since my last bacon-related post.
I can’t let you all get away with out one today.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
They apparently have chicken fried bacon at the Twilight Exit.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:35 PM PDT up reply actions
They do, and it's awesome
but I couldn’t eat the whole portion because I could feel my system starting to seize up.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I've always thought that bar has a depressing name.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
I mean messed up
because it hasn’t yet been deep fried. THEN it’ll be awesome.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
Holy crap! I would sleep for two days straight after eating that.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms.
Holy crap!
I would sleep for two days straight end up in the ICU after eating that.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
This thread needs more
Calvin and Hobbes (especially ones that actually show up).
This reminds me how much I hate those Calvin pissing on things stickers.
I have a hard time believing Calvin has such a clear preference for Ford trucks that he would feel the need to urinate on a Chevy logo.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:52 PM PDT up reply actions
I am happy that the people that actually buy those
have no clue how awesome C&H really is. That they only see it on one level.
I wonder if Bill Watterson makes money off of those things.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions
I've said it before and I'll keep saying it
it saddens me greatly that there’s an entire generation of people that only know Calvin as that kid that pisses on truck logos.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
He has never produced anything nor endorsed anything Calvin/Hobbes related other than the comics themselves.
Yup.
All those Calvin pissing-on-things stickers are in violation of copyright laws.
by FlaskInSafeco on Oct 13, 2008 2:34 PM PDT up reply actions
These are the same people who have tattoos of Yosemite Sam or the Taz.
Screw you, Mariners. I'm back in football's loving arms. t going well.
I should get a Family Circle tramp stamp.
J.K.L.
by Aaron Campeau on Oct 13, 2008 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions
Or the ones where Calvin (and Susie in some cases) are praying.
For one thing those aren’t licensed merchandise (Bill Waterson was very strict about his licensing), and Calvin and Hobbes took a more skeptical view of things anyway.
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions
I have a 187mb PDF file of every last one
Except for that stupid fake on the internet whose creator needs to die a thousand deaths
I need this file.
I have 5 of the books, but it’d be nice to have the complete collection. Is there a way you can put this on a site for download?
by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 13, 2008 3:20 PM PDT up reply actions
just buy the complete C&H
it’s less thefty that way. I may not be averse to downloading the occasional album, but free download of someone’s entire body of work seems to be a little much.
Nice Guys Finish Third - Hopelessly lost, but makin' good time.
I torrented the non-pdf one
Quicker and easier but the Sunday ones didn’t look that great
by JI on Oct 13, 2008 9:40 PM PDT up reply actions
I leave for Orlando on the 19th.
This is going to be the longest damn week ever.
Is anyone else having a hard time loading up SBN pages right now?
The ad server seems to be broken and it’s causing things to hang up for me.
Something is up with SBN.
It’s taking me about seven minutes to load up even small fanposts right now. Appears to be related to trying to retrieve data from whoever is providing the ads here.
SBN is being dumbbbbb....
The road to hell is paved with Mariners.
by .Taylor on Oct 13, 2008 6:44 PM PDT reply actions
Anyone ever hear of Swedish Indie band Love Is All?
They opened for Of Montreal and I thought they were all right and generic. Their best song was Wishing Well which you can find here

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